Rain Of Fire
by omens
Summary: Written for Degrassi Board's 2006 DeBoWriMo. Emma comes face to face with her past and must decide if she's really moved on. [EmmaSean] ...Discontinued...
1. Chapter 1

"Emma!" Manny screamed through the house. "Are you here?"

With a groan, Emma rolled away from Peter and sat up on her bed. Manny was supposed to be out with Jack and Angela all day while her parents were out so she and Peter could have some privacy. But as usual, Manny wasn't sticking to the plan.

"I thought she was going to gone all day?" Peter asked.

"So did I," Emma said and got up to go see what Manny wanted before she headed down the stairs.

She found her in the kitchen, clutching a newspaper like a drowning man with a raft. She was flushed and panting, as if she had run the entire way there.

"What is going on? In case you forgot, I'm a little busy at the moment." Emma said, crossing her arms over her chest in annoyance.

"This," Manny declared with a dramatic flourish of her newspaper, "is what's going on." She tossed the paper onto the table and Emma looked down at it in disinterest.

"Manny, it's the sports section."

"I know." she said. "Look at the headline."

Emma scanned the top of the page and read it aloud. "National Drag Race Finals to be Held in Toronto. So?"

"Look at the drivers." she insisted, picking the paper up and holding it under Emma's nose.

"Unless there's a famous actor or something racing I'm really not interested. In fact, I still wouldn't be interested. And where are the kids?" Emma stated with an accusing glance.

"With Joey." Manny admitted sheepishly.

"Manny. The whole reason I was going to watch Angie was so Joey could be with Diane."

"She had to go into work." Manny said in defense. "But stop changing the subject. This," she waved the paper again, "is important."

"What is so important about a bunch of race car drivers that it couldn't wait until tonight?" Emma finally asked.

"They're already in town." Manny said cryptically.

"Am I supposed to understand that?" Emma asked in exasperation.

"Just read the names." Manny insisted.

With a disgruntle sigh, Emma took the paper and began reading names off. "Luke Tyson, Vancouver. Noah Reed, Halifax. Tyler Randall, Montreal. S..." she stopped, swallowing hard.

"Sean Cameron, Wasaga Beach." Manny finished, taking the paper from her and laying it back on the table. "He's back."


	2. Chapter 2

"Em, you okay?" Manny asked with concern.

Emma had been sitting in the chair she had all but collapsed into after Manny had broken the news that Sean was back in town. But more so shocking, was that he hadn't even called her to let know he was there or even coming.

"Why did you tell me?" Emma whispered. "Why?"

"I thought you'd want to know." Manny told her; confused by the anger she could hear building up in Emma's voice.

"Well, I don't. Of course now it's too late and I do know." Emma snapped, getting out of her chair and pacing around the kitchen. "God, you think I'm going to be able to do anything until I know why he's here?"

"He's here for the race." Manny said slowly, as if Emma wasn't capable of understanding. "According to the article, he's become one of the best Amateurs in the country."

"I just can't believe he wouldn't tell **someone** he was here." Emma whispered, coming to a stop next to the refrigerator and leaned her forehead against the cool metal.

"Would you have rathered I not told you and kept it to myself?" Manny asked.

"I don't know. I mean...its **Sean**, y'know?"

Manny came over and wrapped an arm around her shoulders. "I'm sorry. I thought you'd be excited that he was back."

"Everything okay up here?" Peter's voice interrupted them, and they both sprang apart.

"Peter, I'm sorry. Manny and I were just..." Emma began, flushing because she had actually forgotten for a moment that he was even there.

"Yelling." he finished for her. "You guys were pretty loud."

"Sorry." Manny added. "That was my fault. You know me-speak first, think second. If ever." she shrugged her shoulders sheepishly.

Peter looked at Emma's face, pale and slightly queasy looking. He knew something was wrong. And the fact that they wouldn't tell him made it that much worse.

"Em?" he said softly. She looked up at him, and for a second he thought she might burst into tears. "You sure you're okay?"

She smiled weakly at his concern. "I'm fine." she assured him. "But I think I'll go lie down for awhile."

Try as he might, he couldn't keep the disappointment off his face. He had been counting one whole day alone with Emma and now that was gone. But he couldn't let her know how upset he was, when it was obvious that she felt just as lousy, if not worse.

"Okay. I'll call you later." he said, walking over to kiss her on the forehead before leaving.

"I hate lying to him." Emma said once the door closed behind him. She sank back into the chair she had been in before. "This is something he should know about."

Manny sat down across from her. "Have you told him about Sean?"

"I told him the basics. First boyfriend. Broke my heart. Saved my life."

"But not the details." Manny surmised.

"I just couldn't bear it. Talking about it is just too painful." Tears began to well up in her eyes. "I can't believe I'm still crying over this. It's been over a year."

"A broken heart always hurts, no matter how long." Manny said simply.

Despite the somberness of her tone, Emma laughed. Manny glared at her. "I'm trying to help you."

"I know. It's just that you sound like a fortune cookie." she explained.

"Where do you think I got it?"

"Thanks. For everything. I think I will go lie down for a bit." Emma told her.

"Okay. I'm gonna go get Jack and I'll see you later." she hugged her briefly before leaving through the front door.

Emma sprinted up and made sure that Manny was inside Joey's before grabbing her shoes and her purse from her room. Careful to make it look like she was still there, she snuck out the front door and ran around the corner to the bus stop.

She had to know for sure.


	3. Chapter 3

Dusk was already falling by the time Emma arrived at the race track. Mostly deserted, there were just a few people standing by the announcer's booth at the far end of the course. She hesitated. While she really wanted to se Sean, going up to a group of strange men wasn't exactly the best idea in the world.

"You lookin' for someone?"

Emma jumped at the voice behind her. She turned to see a thirty-ish guy with straggly blonde hair and an oversize jacket there, absently flicking a lit cigarette. Instinctively, she took a step back while trying to find her voice.

"I'm waiting for my...my boyfriend." she said. "I was supposed to meet him here half an hour ago. He probably got tired of waiting and left. So I'm just gonna go." she started to leave, but he grabbed her arm.

"I find it hard to believe that any guy would be angry enough to leave you." he says in a low voice, leaning his face very close to hers.

"Please let go." she says in a weaker voice than she would have liked, trying in vain to pull her arm free.

"Just relax baby." he told her, inching even closer and giving her a whiff of liquor.

"Let go." she said louder trying desperately to pull away.

"Calm down." he said, an edge creeping into her voice. He was starting to get twitchy and Emma was growing more scared. So much so, that neither of them noticed someone had broken away from the crowd at the booth and was coming towards them.

It wasn't until the man was jerked backwards from Emma did either of them notice him. "I believe the lady said ' let go'." he spat at the man who was now lying on the ground.

"Hey man, no need to get violent." he said, rising up and wandering off.

"You okay?" the guy asked, turning around so Emma could finally see who had just saved her.

"Sean!"

"Em, what are you doing down here?" he asked, clearly unsettled by seeing her.

"I read in the paper that you were in town. Were you even going to call me?" she demanded, anger taking the place of the fear of a few seconds earlier.

Sean swallowed and looked down at his shoes. It was obvious that he wasn't going to answer her question.

"Forget it. I don't even know why I'm here." she started to leave but he stepped in front of her. "Why **did **you come down here?"

"I just...I wanted to see how you've been. It's been over a year Sean and nothing. We had no idea if you were alright or not. But it's all too clear that you're just fine."

She tried to leave again, but once more Sean stopped her.

"I tried to call. So many times. But something stopped me." he said softly.

"Like what?" she demanded.

"I just didn't want to hurt you anymore."

Without a word she walked by him.

"Emma!" he called after her.

She turned, walking backwards away from him. "That's crap Sean and you know it."

"Fine!" he yelled. "I didn't want the distraction. There! Are you happy now?"

"If that's the truth, then yes." she retorted.

"Why do you do this? Why do always show up and complicate everything?" he asked,

kicking at a rock.

"Me! Do you not remember the past, I don't know, five years? If anyone shows up at random times and complicates things, it's you."

They stood there for a long time, ten feet apart, glowering at one another while their words sank in. By then the sun had finally gone down and moonlight was beaming down on them.

Sean was the one to break the silence. "I guess we have a lot to talk about, huh?"

"Yeah." Emma said. "I guess we do."


	4. Chapter 4

Emma knew that it was a bad idea. Walking around downtown Toronto, at almost midnight, was sure to get her into more trouble than she could handle right now. Especially with Sean.

"So ... how have you been?" he asked. Those were the first words he'd said in over a half an hour.

"Okay." she said curtly.

"I still talk to Jay sometimes." he told her, kicking at a rock with his shoe so it skidded several feet in front of them. "He mentioned something about you being sick a while back."

"It was nothing." she said hurriedly. There was no way she could get into her eating disorder with Sean now. She had to get him off the subject.

"How did you get into drag-racing?"

Sean stopped walking and turned to face her, even though she was looking everywhere but at him. "Don't try and distract me Em. He said you were in the hospital. That's not nothing."

"How does he always seem to know everything? He was kicked out of school and I haven't talked to him since..." she clamped her mouth shut immediately.

"Since? Since what?" he demanded.

"After you left ... we kind of ... hung out a bit." she stammered. It didn't sound at all convincing, even to her, but it was way better than admitting that she had caught and STD from him after several not so romantic interludes.

"Hung out? What the hell does that mean?" Sean was practically yelling and the few people still out were beginning to look their way.

"Last time I checked Sean," she moved in closer to him so that the gawkers couldn't overhear her, "you dumped me. Then you left. So whatever right you think you have to ask that question, it doesn't exist."

Emma could see the pain flicker in Sean's eyes at her words and she felt a pang of guilt that went straight down deep in her heart. She had sworn to herself, so long ago she couldn't even remember when it had been, that she would never judge Sean or throw any of his mistakes in his face. She had wanted to be the one person he could come to and not have to worry about their opinion of him. She had wanted to be a safe place for him.

Emma had given up on the idea of a happily ever after with Sean a long time ago. But that didn't stop the desire she felt to be able to look at him and just see Sean, not his past. Now here she was acting like everyone else and reminding him of the things he'd done to her.

Sean took a deep breath. He knew that Emma would never be able to forget the horrible things he'd done to her after their break-up, but he had hoped by now that she would have been able to forgive him. The day he went back to Wasaga and decided to stay she had told him that she wasn't angry anymore. At the time he had believed her because the part of him that was so raw from the shooting needed to know that maybe, just maybe, if Emma could forgive him, there was some good in him after all.

"Sean I'm sorry. I shouldn't have said that." Emma said quietly. They stared walking again. Nowhere in particular, just up and down streets, and across intersections, just to prolong the conversation without the seriousness that comes with sitting down.

"No. You're right. I have no right to demand to know what goes on in your personal life. Especially while I was gone. You're not my property, or my business."

She looked down at her shoes to avoid the tears she knew would come if she looked into those eyes of his.

"I just care that's all. Jay's an okay guy and all...he's been a good friend, but...he's not someone you can trust. Around girls, he pretty much has no boundaries." he finished.

"I know. That's why it was o easy." she whispered.

By then they had reached a dead end on a far side of town. A bus bench covered in graffiti and chipping paint sat before them. Emma sat without thought.

"I was really messed up after the shooting. For a long time. And Jay was there. He was safe."

Sean sat beside her, a confused frown creasing his brow. "Jay? Safe? I don't really see that."

"He had a girlfriend. He didn't want a relationship. He didn't even want to talk to me really. I didn't have to think or feel or do anything with him except just be there."

A disturbing thought came to Sean that he didn't even want to consider. But he had to ask-whether it was his place or not. "You guys didn't...?"

Emma's head shot up. Under other circumstances her expression might have been comical. But there was nothing lighthearted going on. "No. Never."

Relief he couldn't explain washed over him. That was a lie, he could explain it.

He didn't want Jay to ruin Emma. That was the way he saw it. There was something pure and almost ethereal about her and Jay's influence had a way of tarnishing the good in people. Especially innocent people like Emma.

"Fair enough." he said. "So are you going to tell me why you were in the hospital or do I have to guess?"

"I had this ... thing. It was no big deal. Honest."

"Em, come on. Being in the hospital sounds like big deal to me."

Emma felt the tears that had been at the edge of spilling over ever since she'd first heard Sean was back in town finally overflowed. "I can't."

She felt the warm pressure of his hand cover hers folded in her lap. A silent plea for her to be honest with him in a way he knew he didn't deserve. But he needed her to know that she was safe with him. And that he truly wanted to be there for her in a way that she had wanted to be for him.

So she told him. Everything about her life since he had been gone. Jay. Her parents. Manny. Her anorexia. Every detail. Except one.

She didn't mention Peter. She just didn't know how.

She was still crying at the end. Somehow his arm had ended up around her and her head on his shoulder. She laughed when he offered her the hem of his shirt to dry her eyes with.

She declined so he wiped them away with his fingers. Closing her eyes against the movements of his fingers on her face, a wave of nostalgia washed over her and it took all her strength to pull back from him.

"You know what? I'm starving." she announced, rubbing furiously at her eyes herself to erase the final vestiges of wetness.

"I think we passed a diner a few blocks back." Sean offered. "Wanna go back? French fries on me."

"Only if we can get milkshakes, too." She smiled at him.

He couldn't help but return it. "Strawberry?"

"You remember?"

"It's hard to forget a girl who likes to dip her fries in strawberry milkshakes." he said and grimaced slightly.

"Its good." she insisted.

"I didn't buy it in grade seven, and I don't buy it now." he declared, standing and offering a hand to her.

"Someday," she said in a playfully warning tone, "I will get you try it. Then you'll have to admit you were wrong."

"That'll be the day." he muttered as they made their way down the streets. Both of them were pretending not to notice that they were still holding hands.

The diner Sean had spotted was old and small with peeling fifties-era wallpaper and a jukebox with flickering lights. The few customers looked unseemly at best and the only staff they saw was a sixty-something woman in a pink polyester uniform like out of an old movie.

She walked over to them once they sat down, drawing stares from the few patrons. It wasn't often they had new customers. Especially ones so young.

"What it'll be?" the waitress said gruffly.

"A large fry and two strawberry shakes." Sean said quickly before Emma could even touch the stained menu that was sticking ever so slightly to the greasy table.

The waitress walked off without another word.

"Charming." Emma quipped.

"Come on, it has ... character." Sean said in a fake cheery voice. He looked at her disbelieving expression and laughed. "Okay, it's a dive. But it's open."

"True." she agreed. They couldn't ask for much more at nearly two a.m. on a Tuesday night. Or rather a Wednesday morning.

The typical awkward small talk common in such situations ensued and Sean listened in skepticism and awe as she recounted tales of Manny's big break, her reconciliation and breakup with Craig, Craig's big break in Vancouver, Liberty and J.T.'s baby, Spinner's newfound religion, and Alex's relationship with Paige.

"Guess I missed a lot." he said.

"Yeah."

Their food arrived and Sean took a tentative bite and sip. Surprisingly good. He took another. Surprisingly great.

They ate it all. And despite Emma's needling, Sean refused to dunk even one fry in his milkshake. An old song came on the jukebox. It was one she recognized vaguely from her mom's massive eighties collection.

Sean noticed the smile playing lightly over her lips at the song and the light rain beginning to fall outside. Some of the lights in the diner flickered and went out, creating a dim glow around them.

"Would it be too corny and out of character if I asked you to dance?" Sean asked.

Emma broke from her daydream and looked at him in surprise. "Dance? Are you serious?"

"It's seems fitting. It's been a pretty ... interesting night."

She grinned. "I would have gone with 'bizarre' but whatever." she held her hand out to him and he grasped it, leading her over towards the few feet of empty space by the window.

With her arms wound around his neck and his hands splayed on her hips, it was hard to imagine that they had ever been apart. Sean could have sworn that if he closed his eyes, he could have been right back to where they used to be. Before he screwed it all up.

Emma's eyes were closed as tight as she could squeeze them. She knew that if she opened them, in the midst of spinning slowly across the floor, it would all come crashing in around her. But Sean messed with her plans like always.

"Em?" he whispered into her ear.

She lifted her head off his shoulder and looked at him. The expression on his face was one she'd never seen. It wasn't a way he'd ever looked at her before or even a way that Peter had ever looked at her and it was unnerving in the best way possible.

The rain was glowing on the asphalt outside in the glare of the lights outside the diner and they cast a warm glow on the two of them, lost in a moment they knew shouldn't be happening. But with the red of the overhead letters reflecting on Emma's face, Sean knew it was hopeless and leaned in to kiss her.

It took three seconds for Emma to respond and about ten after that to realize what she was doing and pull away.

"Em? What's wrong?" Sean reached out toward her, but she turned and ran outside into the rain.

"Emma!" his voice echoed behind her and she dove into the cab she had waved down before the tears began to fall. She had been right all along.

Sean Cameron always led to trouble.


	5. Chapter 5

Emma cried the entire cab ride home and she wasn't even sure why. Each time she thought she had herself under control she would remember Sean's face as he stood in the rain outside the diner looking at her ride off in the cab and she's start sobbing again. So far the cabbie had given her four tissues.

Why was she so stupid? She never should have gone down to that track. Never should have left it with him. Never should have accepted his offer to dance.

But she had done those things and now there was this big dark cloud of a secret hanging over her head. And she was left wondering what she would do the next time she saw Peter.

She hit the back of the seat in front of her in anger, which went unmentioned by the cabbie. This was just classic Sean. Her life was finally going good. Really good. She had her disorder under control, her parents were back on track, and she and Manny hadn't had a fight in forever. But mainly it was because of Peter. He was so wonderful.

But now their relationship was marred forever. She had this ... thing hanging over her head now. How was she supposed to look Peter in the eyes knowing that she had just kissed her ex-boyfriend behind his back? The guilt wasn't something she could live with, and she couldn't just pretend it never happened.

Right?

Telling Peter was only going to hurt him and most likely end what they had tried so hard to build. She couldn't stand losing Peter right now. He had become the biggest part of her support system. Her recovery might give way and collapse if she lost him.

So she just wouldn't lose him. She'd ask Manny what to do. She could be as completely objective as any best friend could be and she would keep it to herself.

Emma tried to crawl through the basement window as quietly as possible. She had no doubt her parents were waiting on her, but there was no reason for them to know that she knew that.

"You're safe. They've been in bed for hours." Manny said. After it was decided Manny would be spending her senior year with them, her dad had brought over all of her things and her bed was set up across the room from Emma's. It was closer to the window, so it was no surprise Emma had woken her up.

"How is that possible? They would never go to sleep when I've been out all night." Emma said as she pulled her pajamas out of a drawer.

"I told them you went to a movie and a late dinner with Peter and probably wouldn't be home until late." Manny said sleepily.

"What about Peter? He was supposed to call me."

"He did. I kept the phone down here by claiming my agent was supposed to call me. I told him you were sick in bed."

She sighed in relief. "Manny, I so owe you."

"Don't worry about it. Where have you been anyway?"

"With Sean."

Manny sat up immediately and turned on her lamp. "You've been with Sean all night?" she asked, waving her hand toward the window where the sun was just beginning to creep up.

"What happened?"

"Well first he saved me from some perv, then we argued, walked around town, I broke down and told him everything that I've been through since he left ..." she began.

"Bet that was fun." Manny interjected.

"It wasn't. Then we went to this diner and ate, we danced..."

"Danced?!" Manny asked incredulously.

Emma nodded. "Then he kissed me."

Manny's mouth dropped open in shock. "He kissed you? Did you kiss him back?"

"Just for a second. Then I panicked and ran out." she admitted as she sank onto her bed with the pajamas in her lap.

"Wow."

"I know." Emma said miserably. "What do I do know?"

"Well you can't tell Peter, that's for sure."

Emma looked up at her. "Why not?"

"Because Sean will be back in Wasaga by the end of the week and you'll be here and alone if you tell Peter. Is it really worth it?"

"I guess not."

"Are you sure you know what you're doing?" Manny asked. "I could always come with you."

Emma shook her head. "I'll be fine. I'm just gonna go and tell him, then I'll be back in time for my date with Peter."

Once Manny had Emma thoroughly convinced not to tell Peter what had happened, they had discussed how she was going to deal with the Sean factor. Emma had finally settled on going down to the track and telling him the truth-that she had a boyfriend and that he should just forget it ever happened.

She headed out the door to the bus stop down the block. Inwardly, she cursed again at not having her license yet.

Fifteen minutes later she got off the bus, relieved not to have to endure any more stares from the other passengers as she mouth the words to her speech in practice.

_'Sean, you're a great guy and last night was amazing, but I have a boyfriend that I really care about so I think we should just pretend it never happened.'_ she repeated for the millionth time in her head.

She walked over to a guy in some type of uniform holding a clipboard. The stands were getting crowded in anticipation of that day's finals. "Excuse me." she said.

He looked up at her with disinterest. "Yes?"

"Could you tell me where I might find Sean Cameron?"

He pointed to a burnt orange car at the far end of the track. "Number eight, last lane."

"Thanks." she muttered, heading through the dense crowd.

She kept going over her speech in he mind as she drew closer to the figure hunched over the lifted hood of what she'd been told was Sean's car. That had to be him. The space got smaller and she realized that it was definitely Sean, working away at something in the engine. Emma got momentarily distracted by the light sheen on the forearms exposed in his white tank. She shook her head to banish the thoughts.

She watched the muscles in Sean's neck tense and his arm cease its movement. She could tell just from those clues that he'd realized she was behind him.

"I have a boyfriend." she blurted out. _'So much for my speech.'_

Sean dropped the tool he had been using into the tool box beside him and stood up, letting the hood slam back down. He turned to her finally, wiping his hands on a rag. "So?"

"So?" she repeated. "That's all you have to say?"

"What do you want me to say Em? Good for you. You should have told me."

"I know. I just didn't know how to bring it up."

"How about by saying 'Sean I have a boyfriend'? That would have been a good start." he shot at her.

Anger began to build up inside Emma. "When would have been a good time? When I told you about hooking up with Jay, or when we talked about my eating disorder?"

"Any time before we kissed would have been great." he muttered, walking around the side of the car and pulling a shirt out of the open window.

"You kissed me." she argued as he jerked it over his head.

"Yeah. But you kissed me back." he said in a little kid, you did too type of voice.

"And I was the one who pulled back. Because of Peter."

"Peter?" he wrinkled his nose in distaste of the name.

"Yeah." she sat on the hood of his car and he plopped down next to her. "He's a good guy.

I think you'd ..." she trailed off.

"I'd what?" he asked warily.

"I was going to say I think you'd like him, but the truth is you probably wouldn't be able to stand him. He's the kind of guy you always made fun of." she laughed.

"And you went from me to him." he said.

"Well, he is pretty cute." Emma said mischievously.

"Ah, I don't need to hear that." he covered his ears with his hands and she collapsed in laughter, reclining back against the windshield.

Sean laid back beside her, watching the other drivers get everything ready for the race.

This was the Sean she remembered. The one she had been so anxious to see the night before. The one she was so desperately relieved didn't hate her.

"So ... we okay?" she asked, turning her head to face him.

"I guess. I wish you had told me though."

"Me, too. I'm sorry. I was only trying to make it less awkward. I never thought you'd kiss me."

"And I'm sorry I didn't tell you I was coming to town." he said softly.

"Why didn't you?"

"I was afraid of what would happen when I saw you." he admitted.

"Why?"

He looked at her with a slightly sympathetic expression in his big blue eyes. "Come on

Em. You know why."


	6. Chapter 6

The only thing Emma could hear was the punding of her heart in her ears. The roar of cars taking practice laps and the sound of dozens of spectators watching were drowned out as her pulse continued to race at warp speed.

"Why?" she managed to croaked out. Her throat felt like it was coated with sandpaper and there had been a huge lump rising ever since Sean had said it.

"We've both been through so much. I just thought it would be easier for both of us if I could just come, race, and go home undiscovered." he said. But Emma knew better. The look in his eyes was far too intense, the color too dark, for him to be telling the whole truth. More than anything, she thought he was just telling her what she wanted to hear. Trying to make it easier for her. "Guess the paper kind of blew that for me, huh?"

"I guess." she told him. "So," she said brightly, "am I ever going to get to see you race this thing?" she asked, tapping the hood of the car.

"Only if you promise to be waiting at the finish line when I win." he replied.

"**When** you win?" she raised her eyebrows skeptically.

"I don't know if you've heard, but I'm pretty good." he stage whispered in her ear.

She grinned at him. "Actually, I have heard that."

"So...you going to stay and watch me?" he asked.

"Of course."

"Good." he hopped off the hood and held a hand out to her. "Because the race starts in ten minutes."

"Ten minutes! Why didn't you say something?" she demanded, taking hold of his hand and sliding off. He began leading her through the crowd toward the same announcer's booth she had noticed the night before.

"Because I know from experience that you won't shut up about something that's important to you." he grinned back at her over his shoulder. They had reached a small set of bleachers by the booth where a few people, mainly women and kids were seated. The drivers' families, she assumed.

"You know me too well." she muttered under her breath. He heard the words and smiled to himself.

"Wish me luck." he said.

She beamed at him. "You know it."

"Peter. What are you doing here?" Manny asked, stepping out onto the porch and closing the door behind her.

"I came to see if Emma was up to going to a race with me."

She gulped. "A race?"

"Yeah. I noticed you guys looking at it in the paper yesterday. I had no idea she was into that sort of thing."

"That sort of thing. Right. You know how Emma is. But she's actually...not exactly here...at the moment." Manny stammered.

His brow creased in confusion. "She's not? But I thought she was sick."

"She was. She is. But this old, old friend of hers, of both of ours really, came into town and Emma went to go see them before they have to go home." she explained clumsily.

Peter looked less than convinced. "Why didn't you go with her?"

"We were never really that close." she smiled at him somewhat lamely.

"Yeah. I don't buy a word of that." he stated matter of factly. "Where is she?"

"She's at the race." Manny finally admitted.

"The race?"

"The old friend of hers, he's racing."

Peter let the words sink in, obviously unhappy with the implied meaning behind them.

"He?"

"Yeah. Sean. He moved away last year, and Emma just wanted to see how he's doing. He didn't exactly leave under the best of circumstances." Manny said weakly.

"Sean? As in the ex boyfriend Sean? Is that where she was last night when I called and you fake whispered that she was in bed? With Sean?" he asked.

"Well..." she began, trying desperately to think of a way to say that Emma had, in fact, been with Sean the night before without upsetting Peter more than she already had.

But he turned around and stomped toward his car before she could say anything more. "Peter!" she raced over and opened the passenger door of his car. "What are you doing?"

"I'm going to go down there and see what's going on for myself since it's obvious my girlfriend isn't planning to fill me in." he said simply, sticking the key in the ignition and turning it.

"You're too angry right now. Why not just wait until you've calmed down a bit? You don't want to do something you'll regret later." she reasoned.

"Who says I'd regret it?" he demanded. He really just wished Manny would shut the door so he could go already.

"I do. I know how much you care about Emma."

He deflated, the pent up anger fleeing form his body. "You're right. But why didn't she tell me if it's no big deal?"

"Because she knew how you'd react. Emma and Sean...they have a history. But **you're** her boyfriend." Manny said.

He sat, staring at his hands gripping the wheel in concentration, and debated whether he should go down to the track or not. Of course he should. If this guy really was just a friend, then Emma wouldn't care. And he wanted to meet the infamous Sean. He'd heard enough about the guy to have his interst seriously piqued.

"You coming or not?" he asked Manny.

Emma watched as the cars made their seventh lap around the track. So far Sean was leading the pack. The paper had been right, he was **good**. Very good. She was practically about to jump out of her skin as she watched the cars circle their final laps around the track.

A small blue and white striped car was gaining on his bumper, and she covered her eyes. Unable to resist, she spread her fingers wide enough to see through. And just in time to see the hood of Sean's dark orange car cross the checkered line just seconds before the other one.

Emma screamed, jumping out of her seat and rushing down the short set of steps to the side of the track where Sean's car was waiting. He had jumped out, whooping and pumping his fist in the air in victory. Reporters and well wishers swarmed him, but she waved her arms like a maniac and managed to catch his eye through the throng of people.

"Emma!" he yelled, tossing his helmet to the guy on his right and side stepping the mayor to get through to her.

She threw her arms around his neck when she reached him, holding on as he hoisted her off the ground and spun her around in circles. "I knew you could do it!" she creid when he set her back on her feet. The only reply he could manage was a huge smile and he planted a huge kiss on her cheek. She hugged him again.

"Sean."

They turned, arms still around one anothers' waists to see the mayor coming toward them with a large trophy and a huge cardboard check. "Congratulations." he said as he handed them over, somehow managing to shake Sean's hand without dropping anything.

He turned back to her, smiling and kissed her on the cheek again as the reporters descended upon them.

Manny and Peter hit the heavy midday traffic as they approached the race track. The race had already begun by the time they found a parking space.

"We're late." Manny complained as they hurried through the crowd.

"I know." Peter scowled, stopping short and peering throughout the stands for Emma's blonde head.

"There she is." Manny said, pointing her out in a small section of bleachers right next to the announcers.

"What's she doing down there?" Peter asked in distasted, eyeing another occupant's clearly pregnant stomach. "It looks like racers' families."

"Well I highly doubt Sean's family being here to watch him." Manny remarked bitterly.

Peter stood rooted to the spot as he watched Emma, clearly entralled by the activities, squirming in her seat and covering her eyes as they race entered the final lap. Whoever crossed the line first won the championship and ten thousand dollars.

A huge roar went up as a dark orange car hurtled across the line, barely six inches away from a small blue and white car. He took in Emma's scram of delight as she jumped out her chair, cheering and runnning off to the side of the track. Then he saw her leap into the arms of some blonde guy and watched him spin her around, only to set her down and kiss her on the cheek. Which he did again after he got his prizes.

Sean. Or at least he assumed it was Sean. He felt the heat in his blood rising as Emma wrapped her arm around the guy's waist as he talke to the reporters crowding around him. She was grinning goofily and gazing up at the guy like he was her hero.

This was **so** not good.


	7. Chapter 7

"That was so amazing!" Emma said once the crowd around her and Sean began to dissapate. "I had no idea watching a drag race could be so... so... "

Sean laughed as she struggled to find the right word. "Exhilirating?" he offered.

"Well, that too." she laughed. "But I meant ..." she snapped her fingers when it finally came to her. "Intoxicating."

He stopped and stared at her. "Intoxicating. I've never heard it described quite that way. Especially by someone who doesn't race themselves."

"It's tru though. " she insisted. "When I was watching you, I don't think anything could have pulld my attention away. It was fascinating."

Sean's lips curved into a grin as an idea began forming in his mind "I don't suppose I could talk you into a ride?"

"A ride?" Emma squeaked.

"Just a few laps around the track. I promise I'll go really slow."

"Are you kidding? I'd love to." she squealed and threw her arms around him once more.

"Let's go." he took her hand and head over to the car.

0000000000

"What are they doing?" Peter asked as he watched Emma and that ... that **guy** head over to his car.

Manny didn't answer. He didn't really want her opinion and there was no way she was going to mess with him given the current mood he was in.

They were sitting in the bleachers that were now almost completely empty, save the few preteen girls clustered in small groups giggling as they watched the drivers. Their eyes moved inperfect symmetry as Sean opened the passenger door of his car and Emma slid inside. He jogged over to the driver's side and got in, heading back over to the starting line.

"Is she going to ride with him in that thing?" he demanded, turning to Manny breifly before looking back out at the car. "Is she crazy? Those things are dangerous."

_'When it comes to Emma, everything about Sean is dangerous.'_ Manny said inside her head.

0000000000

They had been iddling at the starting line for ten minutes and Emma was starting to get impatient. Sean was taking his time explaining everything in the car to her so she wouldn't get scared. It was sweet of him, but she just wanted to **go** already.

"Sean." she interrupted him. "I'm fine. Really. Let's do this already."

He looked slightly taken aback for a second, then smiled. "Okay." and shifted the car into drive. He stepped on the gas, sending the tires squealing as they pulled out.

Emma screamed in suprise, but never closed her eyes as Sean zoomed around the track at full speed. If she wanted a ride, he'd make sure it was one she would remember.

0000000000

"Oh my God! That was unbelievable." Emma said, walking along the track after Sean parked his car for the night.

"Maybe next time I'll let you drive." he said.

Emma paled slightly. "I don't think I'm quite there just yet."

"Suit yourself."

"Emma!"

She and Sean both turned to see Manny and Peter walking toward them. Emma began adjusting her clothes and hair to hide the fact that she was freaking out on the inside. What was Peter doing there? And why had Manny come with him when she was suppossed to be the one keeping him from finding out where she was?"

"Hey Sean." Manny greeted warmly when they reached them. "That was some race."

"You saw it?" he asked.

"Yeah, we got here just as it was finishing up. But we did see you cross the finish line. Congratulations." she told them.

"Thanks." Sean's voice was friendly, yet a little strained. He was looking nervously over at Peter who in turn was eyeing him just as warily.

Emma noticed them sizing each other up and finally spoke up. "Sean, this is Peter."

Sean nodded in understanding. "The boyfriend, right?" Emma nodded. He extended his hand towards the other boy. "Hey man. Emma's said some good things about you."

Emma smiled at Sean's attempt to make this more comfortable for her and she loved him fo it. In a friend way though of course.

Peter took Sean's hand and shook. "Yeah. She's said some good things about you, too. And not just her." he let his gaze tick over to Manny.

An uncomfortable silence settled over them for a few minutes. Manny, who had been fidgeting with anxiety, spoke up brightly, "So Em, we saw you ride in Sean's car. What was that like?"

Emma's face broke into a huge smile. "It was incredible. I've never felt anything like that in my life. It was so ... freeing."

"Wow. Well than you definately have to take me for a ride before you go home." she smiled her biggest smile at him. The one she only used when she was flirting.

Emma began to feel the anger build up inside her. **What** was Manny thinking? Flirting with Sean? And right in front of her too. Even though she and Sean had been over for a long time it was still a pretty rotten thing to do. Then Manny smiled at her and she got it. She was flirting with Sean so Peter wouldn't get the idea that there was anything going on between **her** and Sean.

It was times like these she remembered why she loved Manny so much.

"So guys," Sean said in a rush, obviously attempting to stop Manny from further flirting, "there's a party tonight at the hotel where all the driver's are staying at. You guys want to come?"

"Sure." Emma and Manny blurted out simultaneously just as Peter said "No thanks."

"Why not?" Emma asked him. "It'll be fun."

"Yeah Peter, I thought you were a big party boy." Manny taunted.

He flushed, somewhat angry at her words but mainly at Emma's so obvious eagerness to go. "I thought you were sick." he said pointedly at her.

She squirmed under his gaze, almost as if he were a teacher and not her boyfriend.

"Yuo're sick? Why didn't you tell me. I would have-" Sean began.

She held up her hand to silence him. "I'm fine. And **I **will be there." she told him with plenty of emphasis on the word 'I'.

"We'll both be there." Manny added quickly.

Sean pretended not to notice the tension that had suddenly filled the air as he gave the girls the room number and headed off.

"You're not going to that party." Peter said once Sean was out of earshot.

Emma recoiled. "You're not my boss Peter. If I want to go to a party, I certainly don't need your permision."

"Emma."

"No." she said. Grabbing Manny's hand, she walked by him with a withering glance as she said, "Come on Manny. We have to go get changed. I want to look hot tonight."

"Emma don't do this." he yelled from behind her.

She jerked Manny back around from tossing a glance back at him. Silently, they headed for the bus stop on the corner.

0000000000

They could hear the music blaring before they even stepped foot off the elevator. "At least we know we're in the right place." Manny yelled over the music.

"What?" Emma said.

"What?" Manny repeated.

"Let's go." Emma took her hand and lead them down the hallway where the music seemed to be radiating from. Emma could swear the walls were pulsating around her in time with the thumping bass line.

Manny knocked on the door, and it swung open immeadiately. A tall, burly guy wearing sunglasses stood behind it and grinned leacherously as he looked them up and down.

"We're underage Perv." Manny said as she pulled Emma passed him.

The room was dark except for the stobe lights Emma was sure were againt the htoel rules and a hazy web of ciggarette smoke hung over the crowd. Inside, the music was blaring at an ear splitting decible and the crowd ws so thick she could scarcely move.

"Do you see Sean anywhere?" she shouted to Manny.

"What?" was Manny's reply.

"What?" Emma asked.

Suddenly, she felt a hand on her arm and she spun aorund. Sean was behind her with a tall dark haried guy holding two cups. "Hey." she said in relief.

He smiled and shook his head, indicating that he didn't hear her. He looked at the other guy and nodde towards Manny. He headed over to her and whispered in her ear. Smiling, she waved at Emma as they wove their way through the crowd.

Sean leaned in and whispered directly in her ear, "You want to get out of here?"

"I thought you invited me to the party?" she said back.

"Only because I thought you'd bring you're boyfriend." she replied, taking stock of her short denim skirt and white top.

"He's not exactly happy with me at the moment." she offered with a slight shrug.

Taking her by the hand, Sean lead her out the door and back toward the elevator.

"But Manny ... " she said.

"Will be fine. Trey's a good guy. With instructions to take her straight home as soon as she asks and not to try anything." he told her.

"So you arranged a date for Manny when you thought that I would be with Peter?" she asked skeptically, raising an eyebrow.

He shrugged. "Just in case."The elevator doors opened and he held an arm out for her to get in first.

"Right." she muttered as the doors pinged shut behind them.

0000000000

"Manny."

She turned from her dancing to see Peter standing behind her, looking relieved to see her, and out of place in his khaki shorts and white button down shirt in the midst of concert tees and ripped jeans.

"Where's Emma?" he screamed. But with the music still so loud that she had to watch his mouth move in order to know what he had just said.

Her expression must have given it away, because she could literally see Peter's heart breaking in his eyes as the realization that Emma was with Sean sank in.

He turned to leave, but she grabbed hold of his arm to stop him. Whispering to Trey what was going on, she followed Peter out of the party.

0000000000

"There is no way I'm getting on that thing." Emma stated as she looked at Sean's motorcycle. "What happened to the car?"

"I had it hauled here. Races better that way. But this baby ... " he said as she circled around it, "is what you need if you truly want to know the meaning of intoxicating."

"Sean, no." she said.

"Fine. You stay here while I ride off, wind blowing, air rushing in my ears, heart pounding ... "

She was beaten and she knew it. Sean did too and handed a helmet out to her.

She fastened the straps under her chin and walke slowly to the side as if she were afraid it would attack her. Looking down at her skirt and flip flops she asked, "How exactly is this going to work?"

He unlatched the saddle bag on the side and held the top open. "Put your shoes in here."

"Isn't that illegal?" she asked.

Sean shrugged. "Either that or they fly off."

With a huff, she took her shoes off and put them in the bag. Grinning, Sean latched it and kick started the engine. She jumped.

"Okay, climb on. If your skirt's long enough." he said. "If not, keep both your legs on one side."

Which is what she ended up doing. She should have worn jeans like Manny told her too. Wrapping both arms as tight as she could around Sean's waist without squeezing the air out of him, she closed her eyes and pressed her forehead against his shoulders.

Sean chuckled and peeled out, causing Emma to tighten her grip as they headed down the street.

0000000000

"That was so incredible!" she creid as Sean pulled to a stop near the edge of town.

"I told you." he said.

She hopped off and unlatchde her helmet. "I had no idea it was possible to feel that alive."

"I know." he rested the bike on it's kickstand and flopped onto the grass of the small rest stop they were at. Folding his arms under his head, he peered intently up ta the stars. "Man, they look even brighter here than they do back home."

She sat beside him. "Sean?"

He gazed up at her. "Yeah."

"Are you happy in Wasag? I mean, are you glad you went back?"

It was something she had wondered since Jay's car had pulled out of his parent's driveway and she watched him get smaller as the distance grew. Things had been so strange for her since that day, knowing his life had gotten better in the tiniet way would somehow make it all seem not so bad.

"I guess. I fought a lot with my dad in the beginning, but now it's okay." he told her.

"Good. I know you really needed them after the shooting." Her voice was softer than she would have liked, but she couldn't help it. It made Sean look at her differently and he sat up beside her.

"I've really missed you Em." he whispered.

"You could have called me at anytime. Number's still the same."

He sighed, running a hand through his hair in frustration. "I know."

"I like your hair by the way." she told him and immeadiately wished she hadn't said it. It was totally random and competely out of context for their current conversation.

He looked at ehr as though she had just lapsed into German. "Thanks." he said stiffly.

"I mean it." she insisted, reaching up to touch one strand where it fell against his shoulder. It was much curlier now and took away some of the edge of his face. He looked older, yet sweeter somehow.

"Em." he whispered.

Without thinkning, Emma leaned in and kissed him, letting him pull he down into the soft grass beside him.

He pulled back abruptly. "I don't want to be the reason your relationship ends." he told her, tucking a stray hair behind her ears.

"Sean," she said softly, "if my relationship was working, do you think I'd be here right now?"

"It's not?"

"I thought it was. But the fact that I'm with you shows me that there's something Peter can't give me."

He leaned in closer, letting their breath intermingle in the night air. "What's that?"

"He's not you."

0000000000

"Thanks for the ride." Manny said as Peter's car pulled to a stop in Emma's driveway.

"Yeah." he muttered, eyes still fixed straight ahead as thoug they were still on the road.

Manny placed her hand tentatively on his arm. "For what it's worth, I really am sorry about all of this."

"Sure you are." he snapped.

"Believe what you want. Despite how I feel about you, you care about my best friend and that was enough for me." she opened the car door, but Peter tugged on her arm. She turned just in time for Peter to lean in and kiss her.

0000000000

"Em, are you sure you want to do this?" Sean asked for the third time.

"You're going home the day after tomorrow, right?" she asked.

He nodded. "Then I'm sure." she said and kissed him again, forcing him to lean against the wall outside his hotel room. With one hand tangled in he hair, Sean dug in his pocket for the key card. He finally extracted it and swiped without ceasing his and Emma's current activity. The door open, they stumbled as oone into the room.

No worries. No regrets. Not then. All of that could wait for the next day when she would be one day closer to Sean's leaving her once again.


	8. Chapter 8

_**A/N: A few people have mentioned the spelling mistakes. This is being written for DeBoWriMo, and for those of you who don't knnow what that is it's a challenge to write a certain number of words by the end of the month. There's no feedback allowed on the site, no editing, and no spell check. So please look over the boo-boos. They're out of my hands. But on the bright side, since it has to be done by the end of July, this is one story I know will definately get finished. Anyone who has ever read one of my stories will understand why that's such a big deal. : )**_

0...0

Less than a second after Peter's lips touched hers, Manny put both hands on his chest and shoved him backwards away from her. "Are you crazy?"

"What's wrong?" The dumbfounded expression on his face made it all too clear that he didn't think he was doing anything the bit innappropriate.

"What's wrong? Are you serious? You just **kissed** me, that's what's wrong. What about Emma?" she asked incredulously.

"Emma obviously never gave me a second thought when she went off with her ex boyfriend two nights in a row." he said bitterly. "If she's over it, so am I."

"Goody for you." Manny said, climbing out of the car. She paused before she shut the door and turned back to him. "For your information, Emma **loves** Sean. She always has and probably always will. So you can go be 'over it' with someone else." With that, she slammed the car door shut and stalked in the house.

"Manny." Snake said when she walked in the door. "Was that Peter's car?" He and Spike were sitting on the couch, clearly waiting up for her and Emma to come home.

"Um, yeah. It was." she admitted.

"Well, where's Emma?" Spike asked.

"She's um, she's still out." Manny said, avoiding both of their eyes.

"Where is she?" she demanded.

"If I had to guess ..." Manny began slowly and off their looks knew they wanted her too, "I'd say she's probably with Sean."

"Sean?" Spike asked in disbelief. "Emma's in Wasga Beach?"

"NO! No. She's not." Manny said quickly. "Sean's back in town for a few days."

Looking relieved, but non the less worried Snake asked in a too calm voice, "Why is Emma with Sean, past her curfew, while you're with Peter? And what is Sean doing back in Toronto?"

"Drag racing." Manny told them.

"Drag racing?" Snake asked. "You mean the big national finals they had downtown today? Sean was in that?"

"He won." Manny said as if would help. "There should be a big story about it in tomorow's paper."

"So last night when you said Emma was sick in bed..." Spike said as she began pacing around the room. "She wasn't really in bed was at all, was she?"

Manny squirmed under their equally intense gazes. She already felt incredibly guilty telling them as much as she had. Emma was going to kill her when she found out.

"Manny." Snake prodded.

"It's not really my place to say." she answered weakly.

"Even if you were the one that was doing the lying?" he asked.

She looked up at him, knowing that they knew the truth anyway without her having to say anything. So why should she bother to deny it? "Yeah," Manny admitted, "she was with Sean."

0...0

Sean pulled back form Emma slightly and looked down at her, gaspin for breath. "Em, are you really sure you want to do this?"

Emma sighed in frustration. She adored Sean for the fact that he was trying to make sure he wasn't taking advantage of her, but the nobility act was beginning to get on her nerves. She blew out the breath she hadn't even known she was holding and pushed him away so she could slide off the bed and stood beside it.

"Do you not want to do this Sean? Is that it?" she demanded crossing her arms over her chest.

He sat up, swinging his legs over the side of the bed. He pried one of her hands loose and held it against his chest. His other hand found it's way to her cheek. "Em, you have no idea how much I want this, but I don't want you to leave here thinking you've made the biggest mistake of your life."

"Is that what you think? That I'll leave here wishing it had never happened. If I thought there was a one in a million chance of that happening I wouldn't even be here right now. I'd be off with Peter somewhere. But I'm not. I'm here with you." Emma began running her free hand through Sean's long curls. "Because I want to be."

"What about Peter? Are you guys officially over now? Or are you cheating?" he asked.

"We haven't said the words yet, but we were over the second he tried to forbid me from going to the party." Emma said.

Sean looked at her with all the color draining from his face. "So you're still with him." he stated flatly. He started to get up.

Emma placed both of her hands on his cheeks to force him to look at her. "Sean ... I have been in love with you since I was twelve years old. And nothing has made it go away. Not the fights, not Chris, not Ellie, not the shooting, not Peter, nothing. I **love** you."

Sean's eyes searched hers for what seemed to her like forever. His eyes had taken on a dark, unreadable expression unlike anything she had ever seen, even in the movies. Emma held her breath, just waiting for Sean to call her out for cheating. Instead, his hands slid up her arms to cover her own on his face. "I love you, too."

For some unexplainable reason, Emma burst into tears. Sean looked horrified and stood quickly, wrapping both of his arms around her as she continued to sob, wondering what he had done to make her cry.

Emma was mortified that she was crying. But she had wawited so long for Sean to say those words, and to say them to him, that it seemed almost sad to finally have it all out in the open knowing they felt that way and had lost so much time. But mainly, she was just relieved and really happy.

"I'm ... so ... sorry." she choked out.

"For what" he asked mystified.

"For this." she pulled back and motioned to herself. "For crying like this. God, I'm such a mess." she rubbed at her face and pushed the blonde hair that shad stuck to her face back.

He took over wiping the remainging tears from her cheeks. "You're beautiful."

She scoffed. "A beautiful mess."

"Sounds like me, huh?" he grinned at her.

"Yeah, it does." she agreed.

"Seriously Em, I do love you. One of the only things my mom ever told me that actually made any sense is that when you love someone once, a part of you always loves them in some way." he tucked a stray hair behind her ears.

"So you still love Ellie?" she asked, dreading the answer.

"Yeah, I still love her. But I'm not in love with her anymore."

"You're sure?"

He kissed the tip of her nose softly. "Positive."

"But how could you love me, fall in love with her, fall out of love with her, and still love me?" she asked.

"Because as much as I cared about her," he began seriously, "I never got over you. Not completely."

"I never got over you either." she admitted.

"Really?" he asked smugly.

She laughed. "Yeah. I even took to calling you Hurricane Sean for a while."

Both of his eyebrows shot into his hair. "Sounds about right I think."

She smiled and kissed him again, wrapping both arms around his neck as they fell backwards onto the bed once more. And once more Sean pulled away.

"Sean!" Emma complained.

"Hang on." he said. He went over to the dresser where a clock radio was sitting. "Your first time should be special. Since I can't give you candles and roses, I can at least give you some music." he tuned the radio to a soft rock station he knew she loved because there were no commercials and she smiled at his remembering. Of course he remembered, he had always hated that station.

_I feel my heart doesn't fit  
'Cause it beats too many times  
And it skips  
Running races in my head and then_

I feel my hands don't work  
Touching your skin in the dark  
I was put here to watch  
Not meant to get caught up in it  
Close to your skin

Up and down  
On this merry-go-round  
Take me up  
Put me back in one piece  
But let me feel you  


The song was a new one that she loved, and the music wafted around them. She smiled softly as he came back over and sat down beside her. "I don't need anything but you." she whispered. Tentatively, he brushed a hand down her neck and leaned in to kiss her. He paused the second before he touched her lips, torturously searching her eyes once more for confirmation. She nodded and he kissed her soundly, slowly, deliberately.

_Well, here I am  
Landing myself again  
Ready to fake on a win  
But let me break him in  
Let me break him in_

I made a choice   
Try and make myself invisible  
Make sure I can fit it  
Cause I'm sick of feeling miserable  
Hidden by some lies  
Sacrifice my friendly ties  
Started from scratch  
Won't attack if he walks my way  
Hear what he has to say

I feel my heart doesn't fit  
'Cause it beats too many times  
And it skips   
Running races in my head and then

I feel my hands don't work  
Touching your skin in the dark  
I was put here to watch   
Not meant to get caught up in it  
Close to your skin  


"Sean." she whispered as he ran his hands slowly up her bare back.

"Yeah?"

"I love you."

"I love you, too Emma."

_I made a choice  
Try and make myself invisible  
Make sure I can fit it  
Cause I'm sick of feeling miserable  
Hidden by some lies  
Sacrifice my friendly ties  
Started from scratch  
Won't attack if he walks my way  
Hear what he has to say_

I feel my heart doesn't fit  
'Cause it beats too many times  
And it skips  
Running races in my head and then

_I feel my hands don't work  
Touching your skin in the dark  
I was put here to watch  
Not meant to get caught up in it  
Close to your skin _

0...0

The first rays of sunlight streamed in through the open window directly onto Emma's face. She groaned and buried her face against the pillow. Reaching her arm out for Sean, she discovered that the bed was empty.

"Sean?" she said, sitting up and pulling the sheet up around her. She called again, louder this time in case he was in the bathroom.

As though summoned by her words, the door opened and Sean walked through, carrying a white take out bag.

"Hey." he said softly.

"Hey." she answered.

He set his keys on the dresser by the door and climbed back up beside her on the bed. "I was hoping I'd be back before you woke up." Opening the bag, he extracted a large cup of coffee and handed it to her.

"Thanks." she said. "I'd kiss you but, you know, morning breath."

"It's okay. Maybe this will help." he pulled out a chocholate doughnut and handed to her. She squealed in delight.

"You are officially my favorite person in the world." she said taking a huge bite.

"I wasn't already?" he asked playfully.

"I plead the fifth until I finish my coffee." she said.

He nodded, sipping his own coffee, and his eyes slid over her. "You okay?"

"I'm fine." she assurred him. "Just a little sore."

"Sorry." he said. She could see the regret and sympathy in his eyes and she felt herself melt.

"It's all right. Last night was worth it."

It was Sean who melted then. He leaned in and kissed her, morning breath and all.

0...0

Manny sat uncomfortably at the kitchen table the next morning between Emma's parents. They were both silent and sipping at cups of coffee. Spike wathced the door while Snake kept an eye on the clock above the stove. They had all been up all night waiting on Emma and calling her phone. All twelve calls went straight to voicemail.

"I have to go." Snake announced at a little before seven. He was eaching summer school and ws already running late.

Spike rose as well, also on her way to work. Manny was watching Jack and got up to go get him when the rumble of a motorcycle sounded in the driveway.

Exchanging glances, they darted out the front door just in time to see Sean park, holding the bike up so Emma could slide off.

Balancing the motorcycle with one arm, Sean dug into the side bags to retreive Emma's flip flops. Holding them in her hands, she wrapped her arms around his neck and kissed him.

"Noon?" he asked.

"Noon." she confirmed. Sean had to do some press and photos for the race and had promised her an early dinner and a movie afterwards.

With a heartstopping smile, he kick started the bike and backed out of the driveway.

"Emma!"

She whirled to see her mom, stepdad, and a guilty looking Manny gapping at her from the porch. "Where have you been?"

"I was with Sean." she said in a 'duh' voice.

"All night." Snake said, making it obvious that she was in deep trouble.

"You're suppossed to be home by one. You know that." her mom said.

"It's summer and it's not like I was with some stranger or random guy you can't stand. I was with **Sean**."

"Doing what?" her mother demanded.

"Getting tattooed and doing ritualistic animal sacrifices." she said, walking past them into the house.

"Emma Nelson, you better stop right there!" her mother called out.

She stopped and waited, her back still to them.

Spike came over stood directly in front of her."You are not, under any circumstances, to stay out all night without telling us no matter who you're with. Understood?"

"Yeah."

"I hate to do this, but you're grounded for the rest of the summer." she told her.

Emma's eyes shot up. "But Mom ..."

"No. Breaking curfew was bad enough, but the attitude pushed it over the edge. The next three weeks, you don't leave this house. I mean it."

Without another word she left, followed by Snake and Emma whirled on Manny.

"I can't believe this!" she cried. "How could she do this?"

"Em, calm down." Manny said.

"Calm down. Manny, Sean is leaving tomorrow and my mom wants to put me under house arrest." Emma began pacing. "I won't let her do this."

"Em you don't really have a choice." Manny tried to reason with her.

"Yes, I do." she pulled her cell phone from her pocket and flipped it open. Scrolling down to the number Sean had given her the night before, she hit 'Dial.'

He picked up on the second ring. "Hello?"

At the sound of his voice on the other end of the line made her tension melt completely. "Where are you?"

"About three blocks away. Why?"

"I need you to come back and get me." she said.

"Em, no," Manny said.

Emma ignored her and Sean promised to be there in a few minutes. Snapping her phone shut, she headed downstairs to her room.

Manny followed behind her, begging her to reconsider. Emma refused to even acknowledge her presence, pulling a pair of jeans and a tee shirt from her bureau. She changed quickly and put on a pair of sneakers. The rumble of Sean's motorcycle could be heard growing louder and she headed up the stairs, pulling her hair up as she went.

"Emma please!" Manny cried as she walked out the door to where Sean was waiting.

Emma whirled around. "I thought you would be on my side Manny. You're suppossed to be my best friend."

"I am. That's why I'm begging you, please don't do this." Tears were beginning to form in Manny's eyes and she struggled to keep them from falling.

"Emma, is everything okay?" Sean called.

"It's fine. Manny, try to understand. If someone had tried to keep you away from Craig before he went to Vancouver would you have listened to them? Even me?" she asked.

Manny's shoulders slumped forward in defeat. She wouldn't have and Emma knew that. Just like she knew that Manny would understand why she had to go with Sean now. "No."

"Thank you." Emma said, running over and hopping on behind Sean, wrapping her arms tightly around his waist.

They began to back out, only to be stopped by Peter's car pulling up behind them. He jumped out and ran over to them. "Emma. I tried to call you all night."

"I was busy." she said bluntly.

"Why are you doing this? He's leaving and then what?" He took a deep breath. He didn't want to do what he knew had to come next. "If you leave now, it's over for good." he told her.

Manny watched as Emma stared at him in disbelief. Not because she was worried about their relationship ending, but at his trying to dump her when it was so clear that she already considered them finished.

"Peter," she said slowly like she was talking to a small child, "it's already over."

She whispered in Sean's ear and he turned the bike quickly, riding around Peter and the car, just narrowly missing the side view mirror on the way down the drieveway.

They sped out of sight and Manny looked over at Peter, watching them disappear from his view. He felt her eyes on him and looked up at her. He opened his mouth to say something to her but she cut him off, "Don't even bother." Slamming the door behind her, she went to get Jack just as he awoke and began to cry. Picking him up, she sat down with him and prepared herself for the expolsion that was about to ensue.

0...0

Peter got into his car, knowing that it was over with Emma and that Manny would most likely never speak to him again. Just yesterday, his life had been perfect. How had everything gone so wrong so quickly?

Sean. It was all Sean's fault. He had caused all of this and there was no way Peter would let him get away with it.

0...0

The sights of downtown Toronto sped by as Emma and Sean made their way through town. Sean began to pull over about a mile outside the city limits until Emma whispered in his ear for him to keep going. He wasn't sure if it was a good idea, but he knew there was more to that scene back at her house than he had been witness to. If anyone knew the need to get away from the world, he did. So if Emma wanted out, he would get her there or die trying.

0...0

'Skips' by Alexz Johnson


	9. Chapter 9

Sean pulled of the main highway they had been driving on onto a heavily wooded two lane road a few hours later and let the bike idle until it quit.

"Where are we?" Emma asked.

"About thirty miles outside the city." Sean answered. They had driven around downtown for a while, and out into the suburbs and new developements. When they came to an exit heading west, Emma had told him to take it.

"Why are we stopping?"

Sean leaned the bike onto it's kickstand and got off, Emma following suit so she wouldn't accidently tip their ride over. Sean stood next to the road, facing off into the dense woods surruonding them.

She came up behind him and wrapped her arms around his waist, leaning up on her tiptoes to rest her chin on his shoulder. "Sean?" she asked softly.

"This is a bad idea Em." he stated simply.

"Sean ..."

He pulled her hands away and turned around to face her. "Running away from your problems aren't going to make them go away."

Emma stared at him in shock. **Sean** was lecturing **her** about not running away from problems? It was so ironic that it was laughable. Which is what she did.

"What's so funny?" he demanded.

"I just find it hysterical that you, of all people, would tell me not to run away from my problems. Sticking around was never really your strong suit, was it Sean?" she shot at him.

His expression turned stony, and he faced the woods once more, refusing to look at her. And in an emotionless tone she hadn't heard him use in a long time he said, "Of all people" he threw back at her "I thought you would understand."

"Understand what? Why you had to leave? I did. But that didn't make it any easier for me. And it sure as hell didin't make it easier on Ellie knowing that I got it and she just couldn't seem to. But yeah, I got it then and I certainly get it now." She walked over and stood in front of him, locking brown eyes onto icy blue. Watched as he swallowed hard and fought to keep eye contact with her when he so desperately wanted to break it. Wanted to hide.

"You're a coward."

She noticed the way he reacted to her words. Jawing clenching and the veins in his neck beginning to protrude, she knew she hit a nerve. There was always something about that word, and other conotations of it, that resonate deep within him that make him want to lash out, hit harder, fight back. Just like she knew that they were about to go down that old path. The one that always lead to the implosion of whatever they had built up between tham at the moment. She could feel every fiber in her being screaming at her to stop, to apologize, take it back. But the look in those eyes she knew so well just wouldn't allow it.

"You run when things get tough. Like you ran from us the second things didn't go the way you wanted them to."

"I'm sorry you think so little of me." he said coldly and walked back over to his motorcycle. "Get on. I'm taking you home."

"Ugh!" Emma screamed, grabbing her hair in frustration. "God. Why do we always do this? We can't we ever just ... be. Why do we always have to wreck it?" she sat down on the ground, tears beginning to fall.

"Hey," he said, sitting down beside her and wiping his fingers across the wet tracks, "don't. It's not your fault."

"I always do this. I have all of these ridiculous expectaitons, and then I act like an idiot when things don't go my way." she said.

"You? What about me?" he said. "No matter what's going on, I somehow always manage to make you cry."

She laughed despite herself at Sean's willingness to take everything on himself like usual. "It's not you. I just wanted to have one perfect day with you. Instead, I get a fight with my mom, and take it out on you when you were only trying to help. Sometimes I think I sabotage everything good in my life because I'm afraid of waiting for it to collapse on it's own."

"I'm afraid I do have to take the blame for that one." he said.

"Sean, no."

"I broke your heart Em. More than once. I think that's a pretty good arguement for me being at the root of the problem."

Emma laid her head on his shoulder. "We're quite a pair, aren't we?"

"A beautful mess. That's us." he agreed. They sat for a while longer, not speaking as the sun set over the trees and dusk began to settle in around them.

"Sean." she whsipered.

"Hm?"

"Take me home. I have to face it sooner or later."

0...0

Sean parked a half a block from Emma's house at her request. She didn't want her parents standing on the porch infuriate while they said their goodbyes like they had that morning.

At the edge of the lawn, they stopped. Emma had been fighting back tears ever since Sean turned the bike down her block. Now, they began to spill over.

"You're crying again." Sean's voice, whispered softly against her ear, made them fall even faster. She threw her arm around his neck and breathed deeply, never wanting to forget a single detail of that moment.

"I'm gonna miss you so much." she whsipered in his ear.

"Not half as much as I'm going to miss you." he said.

"Don't count on it." She pulled back, gazing at Sean, trying to memorize every single detil about him from the way his hair now flopped against his collar to the clenched fists inside his pockets.

Emma knew she had to tell him what the scene he had witnessed that morning was really all about and just exactly what it meant for them. Nerves tangling in her stomach, she licked her lips anxiously. "Look Sean, my mom was pretty furious with me this morning," she began, "and grounded me for the rest of them summer."

"And then you took off with me." he sid, the peices beginning to fall into place.

"Yeah. And now, there's no way to know exactly how long I'm going to be incarcerated for. It may be a ... a long time...before I get to see you again." she told him.

He nodded, more to himself than to her as the words sank in. He should have expected a reaction like this. Emma's mom, while she had always been nice to him, had never been good at hiding the fact that she didn't really like him. Or that she thought he wasn't good enough for her daughter.

"It's cool. I'll wait. As long as I have to." he said.

"You will?"

Sean placed his hands on either side of her face and rubbed slow circles across her cheeks with his thumbs. "Yeah. You're worth it Emma."

She threw her arms around his neck once again and held on as if she thought she would never get to see him again ever. He held on just as tightly for a few minutes, until he looked up and noticed her mother standing at the window, watching them.

Slowly, he pulled back, hating the way her arms fell away from him. He kissed her softly, first on the lips, then the cheek, and finally on her forehead.

"You're not going to make this easy on me, are you?" she said, only half kidding.

"I love you Em." he said, the emotion of the past few days catching up to him and making his throat tighten. He left before she could answer, and walked out of sight without looking back. Because he knew if he did, he'd never find the courage to leave.

Numb, Emma walked into her house, coming face to face with her expectedly angry parents.

"Do you have any idea how much trouble you're in young lady?" her mother demanded.

Wordlessly, Emma walked over and threw her arms around her mother, much like she had to Sean only seconds before, as sobs overtook her body.

Confused, Spike hugged Emma back and whispered soothing words as she continued to cry.


	10. Chapter 10

_Tap-tap._

Emma rolled over in her bed when she heard the noise start.

_Tap-tap._

She glanced over at Manny, but found her snoring away as she had expected. Manny possesed that rare yet enviable gift that enabled her to be able to sleep through a hurricane if there was one.

A smalll light ebgan to shine in her general vacinity and she finally got it. There was someone at her window.

While Manny could sleep through anything, her mother couldn't and she would be down there in a heartbeat if she heard anything suspicious. SO she eased out of bed and crept over to the window as quietly as she could manage.

"Sean?" she asked once the window was open.

He held out a hand to help her climb out. On her feet, she hugged him as tightly as she could.

"Em, I can't breath." he wheezed breathlessly.

"Sorry." she let him go. "What are you doing here? I didn't think I'd get to see you again for months."

"I got back to the hotel and it was all I could do to not turn right around and come back here. I think I wore a track in the floor from pacing so much. So I tried to go to bed, but I just ... laid there. I couldn't leave it like that." he explained.

"I don't think I stopped crying until I laid down in my bed." she admitted. "You were gone what, three hours, and I missed you so much I felt like I couldn't breath."

Sean took her hand and lead her around the side of the house to the front yard. They sat on the steps, Emma twinning her arms around Sean's, their fingers entangling naturally. Leaning her head against his shoulder she whispered, "I wish the morning would never come."

"I know. And not just because I'm gonna get chewed out for missing all of my press stuff today."

Emma gasped. She had completely forgotten about that stuff. "Sean, I'm so sorry. It completely slipped my mind."

"Don't worry about it." he said.

She raised her head up and peered at him. "You remembered? And you missed it on purpose, why- why would you do that?" she stammered. She couldn't fathom why he would voluntarily skip something so important.

"Are you serious?" he asked.

"Sean, that could have really helped you. You should have gone."

"Hm, let's see." he said. "Go to the press thing and get my picture taken." he held up one hand. Holding up the other he said, "Or rescue my girlfriend from a panic attack. That's kind of a no brainer Em."

"You missed it because of me?" she sounded awed that he would do that for her, but truth be told he would do a whole lot more if need be.

"How else would you have gotten out of your house?" Emma knew the light tone he was using was only to hide the fact that he didn't want her to make a big deal out of it.

Emma knew that Sean would never understand the magnitude of what he had done. Or he would never admit it at least. "I don't want you to go." she said instead.

Sean took a deep brath and exhaled it slowly. "I wish I didn't have to. I ... I'm really gonna miss you."

Emma's eyes starting prickling with tears again. She ad probably cried an entire gallon in the last few hours, it was a miracle she had any tears left. "Wasaga not that far away. aybe you can come visit after my mom lifts the punishment."

"I didn't mean to get you in trouble." he said softly. She could hear the blame in his voice.

"Sean, you didn't get me into trouble. I did it myself by staying out. And then for leaving. But you want to know something?"

"What?" He tucked a stray hair behind her ear as he asked.

"I would do it all over agin." she admitted.

"Why?"

She snuggled closer to him, nuzzling her nose against his cheek. "Because you're worth it."

"When I'm with you I almost believe that."

Emma looked up at him when she heard the tone in his voice. Sean was looking down at the ground, avoiding her eyes. She felt her heart breaking for him. After all this time, he still had no idea what an amazing person he was. He couldn't see past the mistakes he'd made to notice all of the good things he'd done. "Sean."

He didn't look up.

"Sean, look at me." He still wouldn't.

"Please."

Finally, his eyes ticked up and locked onto hers. Doubt and resistance were swirling around in the blue depths. He was ready to deny anything she was about to say, she could see it plain as day. But she knew she had to. "Sean, you are worth it."

"Emma ..."

"No. You are. Because you're a great guy and I love you. That doesn't change anything that's happened, but it's not mutually exclusive either. And you're not going to change my mind about this no matter how hard you try."

He shook his head, a small smile playing a long his lips. "After everything I've done to you, how is it possible that you still feel that way. What did I do to deserve you?"

"You say things like that." she whispered, kissing him on the cheek.

They settled into a comfortable silence, each lost in their own thoughts. And each anticipating the inevitable second goodbye that would be coming in just a few short hours.

"Emma?"

"Hm?" She was running her fingers lightly up and down Sean's forearm, lost in thought, and wasn't really paying attention.

"Emma." he said a little more forcefully. She raised her head off of his shoulder and looked at him. "Yeah?"

"When you came to the race, you seemed pretty determined that that Peter guy was who you wanted be. What changed?"

Emma took a deep breath. She really didn't want to do this. But she knew Sean, and knew he wouldn't drop it. So she had to tell him. "The second Manny told me you were back in town, I freaked. I knew that everything had changed."

"How so?" He didn't understand why just knowing that he was back in town, for something that didn't even involve her, could have such a dramatic impact.

"Because as soon as I knew you were here you were the only thing I could think about. And I just couldn't ... I didn't want to do anything else until I saw you." she confessed.

"And now, you're sure? About you and me, I mean, you're not going to get back togteher with that guy after I leave are you?"

Emma pulled away and stood in front of him on the steps. "How can you say even think that? After every ... after what's happened the past few days, how can you ask me that?" she stammered over the huge lump that was beginnig to take up residence in her throat.

He stood up on the steps, their noses less than an inch apart. "Because I'm scared!"

"Scared? Of what?"

"Of this!" he motioined between the two of them. "Every time we try to do this, something happens and we just fall apart. I don't want that to happen again." He sank back down onto the step he had been sitting on before, his head falling into his hands.

She sat back down beside him, her hands going to her arm. She wanted, needed, him to know that she wasn't going to give up. "I don't either."

"I don't know," he said, "I just feel like ... if we don't get it right this time ... there might not be a next time."

"I know the feeling." she said.

"So what are we going to do? Try the long distance thing until one of us gets tired of it and just gives up? Then what? We're over for good?"

Emma shook her head furioiusly. "No. That's not going to happen."

He scoffed, and looked at hre. "How do you know?"

"Because I intend to talk to you so much, on the phone, email, whatever, that you're going to get sick of hearing from me. I'm going to fight for us Sean. With everything I have. You're it for me." she told him passionately.

Sean took her face in his hadns and kissed her hard, pouring everything he felt for her into it. "I love you."

"I know. Now can we just stop all of this drama please? I'm not sure I can take anymore."

He laughed. "Okay."

"So tell me," she inquired as she wrapped her arms back around his the way they had been, "what are you planning to do with that money you won?"

"Manny!"

Manny awoke with a start at someone yelling her name. It was Sunday and way too early for her to have done anything wrong. She turned her head, blury eyes finally settling on Spike standing at the foot of her bed.

She sat up. "What's wrong?"

"Emma's not in her bed or the bathroom. Do you have any idea where she is?" she asked, worry written all over her face.

Manny wasn't suprised. With Emma's disappearing act the day before, it was possible that she and Sean could have driven halfway to Mexico before anyone realized they were gone.

"No. She was here when I went to sleep last night." She got up and headed for the stairs with Spike. In the kitchen Snake was on the phone with someone but hung up quickly when they walked in.

"She doesn't know." Spike said.

He nodded. Walking over and grabbing his keys from the hook he said, "I'm gonna go look for her. Call my cell if you hear from her."

Both of them had followed him over to the door. "We will." Spike assurred him. He opened the door and stopped dead in his tracks. Spike and Manny looked around him to see why he wasn't moving.

Emma and Sean were still sitting on the steps the same way they had been the night before. And neither of them made any ackowledgement of to the presence of the peple behind them.

"Emma!" her mother said, obviuosly relieved but furious. "It's not even eight o'clock, what are you two doing out here?"

"It's my fault." Sean said without turning around. "I came over last night and ...well I'm sorry. I just didn't want the last time we saw each other to be when I dropped her off."

The tension that had been hanging heavy in the air seemed to evaporate. "I'm just gald you teo are here, and not off somewhere where no one knows how to find you."

"I'm sorry Mom." Emma said, turning to look at her over Sean's shoulder. "I know I'm grounded and everything but ..."

"Don't worry about that." she said.

The eyes of the other four people in the house turned to her in astonishment. "Sean, would you like to stay for breakfast?"

"Yeah. I'd like that." he said. He and Emma stood up and they walked into the house.

"So how long were you two out there?" Snake asked.

"Since about three." Emma replied.

"You sat out there all night?" Manny asked incredulously. "Doing what?"

"Talking." they said at the same time, then burst into laughter.

Spike, Snake and Manny all looked at one another in bewilderment. Apparently, they just didn't get what was so funny.

Snake got Sean involved in a conversation about racing, and then about Sean's motorcycle. They got so caught up, that Spike had to tell them four times that the food was ready before they got it.

It was a normal breakfast. There was no mention of the fight the day before or Emma's staying out all night and leaving the house after she came home. They talked about common things, the weather, news, sports. Sean tried not to say anything stupid like he had when he had been invited over for dinner. Snake tried to keep the conversation going with random facts and very unfunny jokes. Manny tried to pretend they were funny. Spike was preoccupied with the fact that Sean had pulled Emma and Manny's chairs out for them and that Emma knew exactly which dishes to pass him and when.

Sean helped the girls clear the table and do the dishes after they were finished. He played with Jack when he woke up. Then he went outside and helped Snake work on his car. Emma watched from the window, a soft smile on her face.

Her mom came up beside her. "When is he leaving?" she asked in a low voice.

The day before, Emma would have thought her mother was looking forward to his leaving. Now she kne that she was worried about her and what would happen once he was really gone.

"He told his mom he'd be home before dinner. So probably around three." she answered.

"I'm sorry for you. But it doesn't cahnge anything." She knew what that meant. She was still grounded. No matter how much she was hurting.

"Can I talk to him on the phone?"

"An hour a day. No more. The phone bill will go through the roof."

"Okay."

Her mom squeezed her shoulder reassuringly before walking back into the kitchen where Manny was coloring with Jack.

Lunch came and went and a few hours later Sean got up, saying he had to leave. Emma walke him outside. He had remembered Craig saying that Joey never locked the garage so he had parked it in there for safe keeping.

"My mom said I can call you once a day. But we only get an hour." she said.

He was playing with an end of her hair. Looking into her eyes he smiled. "I'm really going to miss you Em."

"Me too." She hugged him just as tightly as she had the night before, but not as dramatically. He pulled back far enough to kiss her sweetly and then he walked down the steps. At the sidewalk he turned back. She held her hand up in a sort of mini wave. He smiled returned it, walking from sight.

Emma sank down onto the steps, too heartbroken to even cry. They were back together yes, but he was about to be two hours away for who kne how long.

Manny came out and sat beside her. "You okay Em?"

"No." she said, still looking ahead as the ound of a motorcycle rumbled to life in the distance. "I'm not.


	11. Chapter 11

…0...0...0...0...0...0...

"Okay, how did all of this happen, and why didn't you tell me?" Emma asked as they walked through the halls hand in hand.

"When I was talking to you yesterday I just started thinking about how sad you've sounded every time we've talked since I went back to Wasaga. Then I thought about how much I missed you. And these guys, too." Sean jerked his thumb behind them to where their friends we're trailing along behind them.

"We missed you too Sean." Toby and J.T said simultaneously in goofy voices. Everybody laughed.

They rounded the corner and came face to face with Peter. Everybody stopped.

"Well isn't this cozy." he sneered.

Sean stepped a little ahead of Emma, still holding onto her hand. Peter eyed him warily.

Ever since that morning at Emma's house when she had left with Sean, Peter had done everything he could to find out information on the guy. There were more than a few people who were all too happy to dish some really juicy dirt on him, and him and Emma especially.

And he was more than a little unnerved by some of the things he'd found out. Why would Emma want to be with this guy? Yeah sure, he was no saint himself, but this guy - he was an actual criminal. With the rap sheet to prove it.

"Peter, just don't okay." Emma said as the guys continued to stare one another down.

"Don't what? Don't mention the fact that you cheated on me with this guy? Or that you dumped me for him? Why on earth would I ever mention any of that?" he asked, hostility dripping from his voice.

"Dude, you just need to get over it." Sean said.

"You know what, **Dude**," Peter shot back, shoving Sean slightly. "I think you should just stay out of it."

Emma's hand had been jarred loose from his grasp, but now she took hold of it again to pull him backwards away from Peter. "Sean, please don't. He's so not worth it."

"Come on man. Hit me. It's what you do best, isn't it?" Peter called to him. By now they were beginning to draw a crowd.

Sean made to go at Peter, but Emma placed her hands on his chest to stop him. J.T. and Toby were behind her now, ready to stop Sean if he somehow got past her. If they could.

"Sean." Emma said, but he was still looking over her shoulder at Peter. She placed her hands on his face, forcing him to look at her. "Sean. Please. For me."

The crowd around them was dead silent as they watched, and everyone heard Emma's plea. The air of tension hanging over the crowd visibly melted when they saw Sean's shoulders relax at her words. She had gotten through to him.

"Fine. But just this once." Sean said in a low voice so that only Emma could hear him.

"Okay. But not on school property. If you get expelled, I'll kill you." she said.

He took hold of her hand and started walking again, the crowd beginning to disperse.

They walked by Peter, and noted that his face was turning bright red with anger. He had obviously been expecting Sean to jump him.

"I can't believe you Emma." Peter called after her. "After everything we went through to

be together."

Emma stopped and, despite her better judgment, turned back to him. "What exactly did we go through Peter? My illness had nothing to do with you."

"I was there for you though. And I kept our relationship a secret for you because you didn't want to upset Manny." he said defensively. He actually sounded as though he thought she owed him a thank you or something for what he had done.

"It's over Peter. Accept it." she said.

"Accept what? You dumping me for that criminal? I don't think so." he said.

The few remaining spectators all gasped and started whispering at Peter's words.

Emma walked slowly toward him, fury glittering in her eyes. "You do not call him that. Do you understand me? You don't even know him."

"I know enough to know why you seem to like him so much." he said.

Toby and J.T. were still standing in front of Sean, and Manny and Liberty had each taken hold of one of his arms to keep him form charging at Peter.

"Oh really. And why is that?"

"It's the whole good girl, bad boy thing. You get a kick out of the cliché. It makes the goody tow shoes image more bearable, doesn't it?"

A few people in the crowd snickered at that. Some of them thinking that Peter had no idea about what had happened between Emma and Jay.

Emma breathed deeply at the sound of the laughter. She was not going to let this get out of hand. "You know what Peter? You're just mad because you gut dumped. For another guy even. And that wounds your little male ego, doesn't it? That poor little damaged me could possibly like someone else more than you. Why don't you just get over yourself and leave me alone. It's all a little pathetic." she said, turning away from him.

"Whatever Emma." Peter called after her. "I just hope the sex was good enough to trash what we had."

Emma stopped dead in her tracks, the sound of laughter and whispering flowing around her. She could see Sean in front of her, struggling with himself not to pound Peter's face into the ground. A part of her wanted him to. But another part of her wanted something else.

Before anyone knew what was happening, Emma had stalked over and decked Peter, sending him flying to the ground with blood gushing from his nose.

"All right Emma!" J.T cried, rushing over to giver her a high five.

Walking over to where she was still staring down at Peter on the floor, Sean took her hand. "Let's get to class."

"So what exactly are your plans?" Emma asked Sean as they sat down in Media Immersion. "You're not going back on Student Welfare, are you?"

"No. I can't. I'm eighteen and I've made too much from racing to qualify." he told her.

"Well, do you even have a place yet?"

He shook his head. "A hotel room I rented last night. I'm going to go look at apartment after school. I don't suppose you'd want to come with me?" he grinned at her, trying to be convincing.

"I would love to, you know I would. But I'm still grounded." she told him.

Disappointed, he sank back into his chair. "Fine. But you have to come over the second you get paroled."

She smiled. "Promise." she leaned in and kissed him lightly.

"Emma."

She looked up at the sound of her name. Snake was standing at the classroom door. Behind him was Ms. Hatzilakos. And she looked furious.

"You're needed in the office." he told her.

With a quick glance at Sean, she grabbed her bag and headed out the door, following the angry principal down the hallway.

…0...0...0...0...0...0...

"A week's worth of detention isn't so bad. It could have been a lot worse." Manny said, draping an arm around Emma's shoulder reassuringly.

They were waiting outside the door to the automotive class where Sean had last period.

Manny was on her way to play rehearsal, but wanted to stay with Emma until Sean got out of class, just to make sure she was all right.

"A month would have been worth it." Emma said. "But my mom is going to freak when she finds out. Then my grounding will most likely double."

"Oh yeah. I forgot about that." Manny said sheepishly. The class started streaming out and she said goodbye, heading off in the direction of the gym.

Sean came up behind her and slid his arms around her waist. "Hey."

She smiled. "Hey yourself. Think I could talk you into walking me home?"

"After you." They headed off, holding hands and drawing stares from every direction.

"I still can't believe you punched that guy. That was so not like you." he said.

"I know. I think you're beginning to rub off on me."

"I would have done it for you." he said playfully.

Emma's expression turned serious. "There was no way I was going to let him talk about you, and us, like that."

"I don't think he'll be doing it again any time soon. You've got some right hook Em."

She laughed. "Thanks. But I wouldn't count Peter out just yet. He's very ... determined."

They reached her house and Sean kissed her before heading off to look for apartments, with a promise to call later that night.

Emma smiled as she watched him disappear from sight. It was the first time in a long time she wasn't devastated to see him walking away from her. Maybe because she knew he would still be there tomorrow.

…0...0...0...0...0...0...


	12. Chapter 12

"Okay, how did all of this happen, and why didn't you tell me?" Emma asked as they walked through the halls hand in hand.

"When I was talking to you yesterday I just started thinking about how sad you've sounded every time we've talked since I went back to Wasaga. Then I thought about how much I missed you. And these guys, too." Sean jerked his thumb behind them to where their friends we're trailing along behind them.

"We missed you too Sean." Toby and J.T said simultaneously in goofy voices. Everybody laughed.

They rounded the corner and came face to face with Peter. Everybody stopped.

"Well isn't this cozy." he sneered.

Sean stepped a little ahead of Emma, still holding onto her hand. Peter eyed him warily. Ever since that morning at Emma's house when she had left with Sean, Peter had done everything he could to find out information on the guy. There were more than a few people who were all too happy to dish some really juicy dirt on him, and him and Emma especially.

And he was more than a little unnerved by some of the things he'd found out. Why would Emma want to be with this guy? Yeah sure, he was no saint himself, but this guy - he was an actual criminal. With the rap sheet to prove it.

"Peter, just don't okay." Emma said as the guys continued to stare one another down.

"Don't what? Don't mention the fact that you cheated on me with this guy? Or that you dumped me for him? Why on earth would I ever mention any of that?" he asked, hostility dripping from his voice.

"Dude,you just need to get over it." Sean said.

"You know what, **Dude**," Peter shot back, shoving Sean slightly. "I think you should just stay out of it."

Emma's hand had been jarred loose from his grasp, but now she took hold of it again to pull him backwards away from Peter. "Sean, please don't. He's so not worth it."

"Come on man. Hit me. It's what you do best, isn't it?" Peter called to him. By now they were beginning to draw a crowd.

Sean made to go at Peter, but Emma placed her hands on his chest to stop him. J.T. and Toby were behind her now, ready to stop Sean if he somehow got past her. If they could.

"Sean." Emma said, but he was still looking over her shoulder at Peter. She placed her hands on his face, forcing him to look at her. "Sean. Please. For me."

The crowd around them was dead silent as they watched, and everyone heard Emma's plea. The air of tension hanging over the crowd visibly melted when they saw Sean's shoulders relax at her words. She had gotten through to him.

"Fine. But just this once." Sean said in a low voice so that nly Emma could hear him.

"Okay. But not on school property. If you get expelled, I'll kill you." she said.

He took hold of her hand and started walking again, the crowd beginning to disperse. They walked by Peter, and noted that his face was turning bright red with anger. He had obviously been expecting Sean to jump him.

"I can't believe you Emma." Peter called after her. "After everything we went through to be together."

Emma stopped and, despite her better judgment, turned back to him. "What exactly did we go through Peter? My illness had nothing to do with you."

"I was there for you though. And I kept our relationship a secret for you because you didn't want to upset Manny." he said defensively. He actually sounded as though he thought she owed him a thank you or something for what he had done.

"It's over Peter. Accept it." she said.

"Accept what? You dumping me for that criminal? I don't think so." he said.

The few remaining spectators all gasped and started whispering at Peter's words.

Emma walked slwoly toward him, fury glittering in her eyes. "You do not call him that. Do you understand me? You don't even know him."

"I know enough to know why you seem to like him so much." he said.

Toby and J.T. were still standing in front of Sean, and Manny and Liberty had each taken hold of one of his arms to keep him form charging at Peter.

"Oh really. And why is that?"

"It's the whole good girl, bad boy thing. You get a kick out of the cliche. It makes the goody tow shoes image more bareable, doesn't it."

A few people in the crowd snickered at that. Some of them thinking that Peter had no idea about what had happened between Emma and Jay.

Emma breathed deeply at the sound of the laughter. She was not going to let this get out of hand. "You know what Peter? You're just mad because you gut dumped. For anther guy even. And that wounds your little male ego, doesn't it? That poor little damaged me could possibly like someone else more thn you. Why don't you just get over yourself and leave me alone. It's all a little pathetic." she said, turning away from him.

"Whatever Emma." Peter called after her. "I just hope the sex was good enough to trash what we had."

Emma stopped dead in her tracks, the sound of laughter and whispering flowing around her. She could see Sean in front of her, struggling with himself not to pound Peter's face into the ground. A part of her wanted him to. But another part of her wanted something else.

Before anyone knew what was happening, Emma had stalked over and decked Peter, sending him flying to the ground with blood gushing from his nose.

"All right Emma!" J.T cried, rushing over to giver her a high five.

Walking over to where she was still staring down at Peter on the floor, Sean took her hand. "Let's get to class."

"So what exactly are your plans?" Emma asked Sean as they sat down in Media Immersion. "You're not going back on Student Welfare, are you?"

"No. I can't. I'm eighteen and I've made too much from racing to qualify." he told her.

"Well, do you even have a place yet?"

He shook his head. "A hotel room I rented last night. I'm going to go look at apartment after school. I don't suppose you'd want to come with me?" he grinned at her, trying to be convincing.

"I would love to, you know I would. But I'm still grounded." she told him.

Disappointed, he sank back into his chair. "Fine. But you have to come over the second you get parolled."

She smiled. "Promise." she leaned in and kissed him lightly.

"Emma."

She looked up at the sound of her name. Snake was standing at the classroom door. Behind him was Ms. Hatzilakos. And she looked furious.

"You're needed in the office." he told her.

With a quick glance at Sean, she grabbed her bag and headed out the door, following the angry principal down the hallway.

"A week's worth of detention isn't so bad. It could have been a lot worse." Manny said, drapping an arm around Emma's shoulder reasuringly.

They were waiting outside the door to the automotive class where Sean had last period. Manny was on her way to play rehearsal, but wanted to stay with Emma until Sean got out of class, just to make sure she was all right.

"A month would ahve been worth it." Emma said. "But my mom is going to freak when she finds out. Then my grounding will most likely double."

"Oh yeah. I forgot about that." Manny said sheepishly. The class started streaming out and she said goodbye, heading off in the direction of the gym.

Sean came up behind her and slid his arms around her waist. "Hey."

She smiled. "Hey yourself. Think I could talk you into walking me home?"

"After you." They headed off, holding hands and drawig stares from every direction.

"I still can't believe you punched that guy. That was so not like you." he said.

"I know. I think you're beginning to rub off on me."

"I would have done it for you." he said playfully.

Emma's expression turned serious. "There was no way I was going to let him talk about you, and us, like that."

"I don't think he'll be doing it again any time soon. You've got some right hook Em."

She laughed. "Thanks. But I woudn't count Peter out just yet. He's very ... determined."

They reached her house and Sean kissed her before heading off to look for apartments, with a promise to call later that night.

Emma smiled as she watched him disappear from sight. It was the first time in a long time she wasn't devestated to see him walking away from her. Maybe because she knew he would still be there tomorrow.


	13. Chapter 13

…0...0...0...0...0...0...

"A week? What could you have possibly done to get a week's detention?"

Emma winced at the anger in her mother's voice. She had been home for almost two hours before her mom, and hadn't figured out a way to tell her yet. Naturally, Snake had beaten her to it when he'd come in right behind her and asked Spike not to be too hard on her. She hadn't understood, and Emma had been forced to fess up.

"I sort of ... hit someone."

"You hit someone? Why on Earth would you do that? And who was it?" her mother demanded.

"Um ... Peter." she said in a small voice.

"You hit Peter!"

"She did more than just hit him. She broke his nose." Manny said, walking through the kitchen door.

"Emma." Manny, realizing her mistake, made a hasty exit downstairs, throwing an apologetic look over her shoulder at Emma. Turning her attention back to her mother, she wished she could just escape to her room like Manny. The disappointment in Spike's voice was obvious, and for the first time that day Emma felt a twinge of guilt over what she had done. "Why did you hit Peter?"

With a deep breath, she began to tell the story or at least the parts that she could tell her mother about. "He was just saying this stuff about Sean, and about our relationship. I guess I just let my temper get the better of me. That's all. I'm sorry." She kept her eyes on the floor the entire time; she couldn't bear to see the disappointment in her Mom's eyes again.

Sinking down into the chair across the table, Spike reach over and took her daughter's hand. "Em, I'm sure Peter said some things he shouldn't have, but that doesn't give you the right to ..."

Emma's head shot up and she locked eyes with her mother. "It was way more than that Mom. He was way out of line. If you had heard what he said ..." she clamped her mouth shut. There was no way she was going to go into this.

But apparently Spike had gotten the impression that she did want to talk about it.

Eyebrows slightly raised, she asked "What exactly did he say?"

"It was nothing. Just ... stupid stuff."

Snake had been in the living room with Jack, listening carefully in case things began to get out of hand. Emma and Peter's scene had become the hot topic of the day, and he had overheard a few grade eights discussing it. He didn't blame one bit for hitting him. If he had been there, he wasn't so sure he wouldn't have done the same thing.

Spike's voice indicated that things were about o get a little heated. There was no way Emma would tell her what Peter had said, which would only infuriate her further. He found a toy to occupy Jack and headed off to run interference. "Spike, I think Ms. Hatzilakos is just blowing this whole thing out of proportion. Maybe we should just drop it."

"Fine." she agreed reluctantly, seeing that she would get no answers out of either of them.

"So Em," Snake said brightly, relieved to have the potentially volatile situation over with, "you must be pretty excited."

"About what?"

"Sean. Has he found a new place yet?"

Emma froze, sensing the impending explosion. Holding her breath, she watched her mother turn, torturously slow, to face her. "Sean's back?"

"Yeah." Spike's face began to turn red, never a good sign, and Emma barreled on. "Before you say anything, I didn't know. He just showed up at lunch today and announced that he was enrolled."

"Why didn't you tell me?" she demanded.

"You were already so upset that I had detention, I didn't want to make you angrier."

Emma told her, giving her the big puppy eyes that had gotten her out of trouble since she was two.

"And you didn't want me to extend your grounding so you could spend time with him." she finished for her.

It took all of Emma's self-control not to scream. Sometimes her mother knew her so well it scared her. "Sort of."

The sheepish look on her daughter's face was all it took to convince Spike that she had learned her lesson. The thought of losing more time with Sean was causing Emma more fear than an entire year's worth of grounding ever could.

"I understand."

"You do?" Emma's voice, mostly awe, hid an under layer of suspicion. It was almost as if she couldn't quite believe her luck that her mom would give in so easily.

"Of course. I was young once. But no more trouble. Or I'll be forced to reconsider."

"Saturday?" Emma asked hopefully.

"Saturday." Spike confirmed.

With a jubilant squeal, Emma threw her arms around her mother and made a mad dash for her bedroom.

"Hey, where are you going?" Snake called.

"I have to call Sean and let him know." she answered, without even a backwards glance.

Chuckling, Snake and Spike shared a look of sympathy. Life in their house was about to

get a whole lot crazier.

…0...0...0...0...0...0...

Emma paced anxiously in front of the living room window, checking her watch for the tenth time. Sean was due any second.

He had found a place in his old building the same night he began looking. His former landlord had also put his stuff into storage after Ellie had moved out. He said he had just had a feeling that either Sean or Tracker would eventually be back. But Sean had most of his things in Wasaga. After explaining that the idea to move back had been on impulse and that he just grabbed a bag and packed quickly, he asked her to come back with him to get the rest of his stuff.

Emma had agreed of course. But she was terrified at the thought of meeting Sean's parents. She had heard so much about them, and his relationship with them, that she had a pretty vivid picture in her mind of what they would be like. And it wasn't pretty.

Sean's car pulled up in front of her house. The same one he had used in the race. He'd confessed that it wasn't even his. He was borrowing it from a friend of Jay's. More good news.

The car ride was long and tense, Sean quiet and Emma fidgety. All too soon they pulled up in front of the white double wide that Emma recognized from their last trip here.

Looked like it was now or never.

…0...0...0...0...0...0...


	14. Chapter 14

…0...0...0...0...0...0...

"Emma, stop fidgeting."

Ceasing the twisting of the bracelet she was wearing around her wrist, Emma looked nervously at Sean. She couldn't remember a time when she was more nervous.

Sean had left his house keys in the haste to get to Toronto. They had already knocked on the door three times, but so far no one was answering.

"Maybe we should just go." she said. It was hard to keep the relief out of her voice. She knew Sean wanted her to meet his parents. If he didn't, then she wouldn't even have been there.

"I just don't get it. I called my mom earlier. She said they'd be here." Sean's expression was full of disappointment, the hurt evident in his eyes and the low pitch of his voice. His eyes were on the ground, no doubt to disguise the pain he was in. He looked like a lost little boy almost, and Emma felt a surge of protectiveness toward him.

Placing a hand on his shoulder, she moved in closer. "Hey." she whispered, "we can come back another time. It's all right."

"No, it's not." he said. "They were supposed to be here. I just ... I can't believe that I let myself think that they would keep their promise this time. I don't know why I expected …"

"Because you wanted it." she told him, wrapping her arms through the crook of his elbow, her chin propped on his shoulder. "And that's understandable."

"Let's just go. They can just send me my stuff or whatever." He took hold of her hand and began walking down the steps.

A pale blue car of a year and model that Emma couldn't distinguish pulled up in the driveway beside Sean's borrowed car. She felt more than saw Sean tense beside her. He was clenching and unclenching his jaw, a habit he always exhibited when he was nervous or scared.

The driver's side door opened, a blonde woman of around fifty emerging. Even from a distance Emma could tell she had Sean's eyes. His mother.

"Sean." The relief was evident in her voice. "I was afraid I'd missed you."

"You almost did." he said, a little coldly. "Where's Dad?"

"Your Uncle Jeff is sick. I just dropped him off at the train station." Her eyes, Sean's eyes, fell on Emma, still gripping Sean's hand like a life preserver.

Oblivious to his mother's gaze, Sean asked worriedly, "What's wrong with Uncle Jeff?"

"Looks like a heart attack. They don't know yet."

Sean nodded, taking the news in. "Okay. So, can we get in?"

"Sean." Emma said softly.

"Oh right." he replied. "Mom, this is my girlfriend Emma. Em, this is my mom."

Emma smiled warmly at her. Or as warmly as she could given her nerves and the things she'd heard about her from Sean. In return, she got an appraising look from head to toe. She shifted uncomfortably.

"Well, it's nice to meet you. Come on in." She walked right past them up the steps and unlocked the door.

Inside the double wide, Emma wasn't sure what to do. Sean had whispered that he'd be quick and walked down the hall to a room at the far end. His mother was opening the refrigerator, rummaging for something. She emerged, holding a large pitcher of what looked to be pink lemonade. It, and two glasses, were placed on the table beside a plate of cookies.

"Sit." she said. "We should get to know one another."

Reluctantly, Emma sat in the chair across the table from hers. She accepted the drink and let her eyes wander around. It reminded her very much of the apartment Sean and Tracker had shared before they left. Her eyes fell on a framed picture on the wall. A little boy with blonde curls sat in the sand as the surf crashed around him. He was laughing and splashing his hands in sheer delight.

"Is that Sean?" she asked, sipping the lemonade.

His mom turned and looked to see which picture she was looking at. "Yeah it is." she smiled fondly. He was almost three. Back then it took forever to get him out of the water. He loved it."

She looked at Emma as if something had just occurred to her. "Would you like to see some more pictures?"

"I'd love to." she said sincerely.

…0...0...0...0...0...0...

Sean packed his stuff as fast as he could. He had no idea what his mother might say to Emma and he wasn't willing to risk laving them alone for too long. At least his dad wasn't there. He would likely have said something off color that would have completely embarrassed Emma.

His duffel bag and backpack stuffed and zipped, he took one final look around the room he had grown up in. It was almost completely empty, but he had never really seen the need to keep a lot of junk lying around anyway. The one thing he had forgotten somehow on his way to Toronto. Stuck in the corner of the wooden framed mirror that had hung above his dresser for as long as he could remember, was the picture Emma's mother had taken of them on their first date. He had kept it in his wallet ever since, even during the numerous breakups. Taking it out would have felt ... wrong somehow. The only time he had ever removed it had been the day he was leaving and he had dropped it in the search for the spare house key he kept in his wallet to leave. He'd put it in the frame so he wouldn't forget it. Which he did anyway in his rush to get to her.

He grabbed it, sticking it in the front pocket of his backpack. A peel of laughter sounded from the other room. Grabbing his bags, he headed in to find Emma and his mom, side by side, looking at an old photo album over lemonade and peanut butter cookies.

"Oh my God, that is so adorable." Emma said, pointing to an image on the page. It was then that Sean realized just which album they had. His baby pictures.

"Mom! Emma doesn't want to see those." he complained.

"Yes, Emma does." She said. His mom smiled, suppressing laugh. "You were so cute." Emma cooed.

Sean felt a blush creeping up his neck. It made no sense at all. After everything he and Emma had been through, and the fact that they had slept together, there was no reason for him to ever be embarrassed of anything around her. His baby pictures in particular.

"Em, we better go if we're going to be back in time for dinner." he said.

"All right." she stood, accompanied by his mom. "Here." she handed a picture to Emma. It was a smaller copy of the one on the wall she had liked so much.

"I can't take this." she insisted.

"Yes, you can. I want you to have it."

"Thank you." Emma said sincerely, tears beginning to form in her eyes.

"Now don't cry. Just take good care of my baby." Sean flinched at her words.

"I promise."

"Em, could you give us a second?" he asked.

"Sure. I'll just wait in the car." He handed her the keys and she said her goodbyes, leaving quietly.

"She's not at all what I expected." his mother told him

"How so?"

"There's no need to get defensive Sean." She picked up the plate and glasses, carrying them back to the sink. He focused on the peeling wallpaper over the counter while he waited for her to answer.

"She's ... tougher ... than you implied." she said finally.

"I told you that she was the strongest person I'd ever met." His tone was accusatory, and she noticed.

"But the things you said, I just thought she'd be a little more reserved. She was so sweet.

A real survivor, that one. No wonder you like her so much."

Sean remained silent.

"Sean?" she prodded. "It's okay to admit that you care about her."

"I love her." he admitted, unnerved at the magnitude of the confession he was making.

"Have you told her?"

He nodded.

"Good. Something like that needs to be shared." She hugged him. "Don't you break her heart again. You hear me?"

"Yeah."

"I love you Sean."

"Love you, too."

…0...0...0...0...0...0...

Calm silence filled the car on the drive back. As soon as Sean had gotten in the car, he'd kissed her and thanked her for coming with him. But he hadn't said a word since.

"Sean?"

"Yeah?"

"Are you okay?" she asked, leaning over to run her fingers through his hair.

"Just thinking." he answered.

"What about?"

"How differently things could have gone today. It went a lot better than we expected."

Her brow creased in confusion. "We?"

"Admit it; you were expecting a disaster, right?"

"Guilty. I'm sorry; it's just with everything you've told me …"

"I get it. And I'm sorry for that." He held his arm out toward her, an invitation for her to snuggle against him. She scooted over, tucking her feet up underneath her, head against his chest.

The exit for Toronto was coming up and Emma was struck by an odd idea. Sean had just done something really hard by letting her meet his mom. Had his father been there as well it would have been that much more important, and difficult, to him. And even though she had told him all of her dark secrets, she still felt like there was something missing that would really make their relationship completely honest.

"Sean, take Exit 37." she told him.

"Why?" he asked, slanting a questioning glance down at her from the corner of his eye.

"We have another stop to make."

"Are you going to tell me where?" he asked.

"Stouffville." she said simply. "I want you to meet my dad."

…0...0...0...0...0...0...


	15. Chapter 15

…0...0...0...0...0...0...

It was Sean's idea for Emma to call the hospital ahead of time about their visit. The first time she had been there, the nurse had freaked when she went up to see her dad without an appointment. And the last thing she wanted was for him to get upset like the last time.

The same nurse was waiting for them at the front desk when they arrived. She had the same stern expression and air of disapproval about her that she'd had the first time Emma had met her.

"Emma. Nice to see you again." she said dryly.

"Likewise." Emma answered sweetly.

"Shane's been waiting for you. He's very excited to show you the afghan he knitted for you." she turned and began walking briskly toward the front door without waiting for a response. With a roll of her eyes, Emma followed, Sean right behind her.

At the top of the stairs Emma paused. She had been visiting her dad at least once a month since she had found him, but it never got any easier to see him like that. Sensing her hesitation, Sean squeezed her hand. She smiled weakly at him. He knew how hard coming here was on her, and having him meet her father must have been as huge to her as her meeting his mom had been to him. His parents weren't perfect, but they weren't sick. He could only imagine what she was feeling right then.

"Here we are, room 209." she said.

"Em, its okay." he assured her.

"You say that now. Just wait." She pushed the door open. Shane was sitting pacing around the floor, arranging and rearranging the items on his desk.

"Emma!" His voice was excited when he noticed her standing in the doorway. "You're

early. It's still this many," he held up eight fingers, "until you visit."

Emma smiled. "I know. And I'm still going to come next weekend, but we were driving

this way and decided to stop by."

"I'm happy. I wish I could see you more." he replied.

"I know." She turned to Sean and held her hand out for him to come over. "There's

somebody I'd like you to meet."

Shane looked Sean over. "He's not the same boy." His face creased in confusion. "I don't know him."

Emma could see him about to get upset. She hurriedly took his hands and sat him down on the edge of the bed. "It's okay. He's to going to hurt you."

"He's not the same boy." Shane repeated. Sean decided to stay by the door, not wanting to interrupt before Emma got him calmed down.

"No, he's not." Emma said. "That was my friend Craig. He's Joey's stepson. You remember Joey, don't you?"

Shane nodded, no longer looking like he was about to freak out. "I know Joey. Joey is

friend of Snake and Spike's."

"Right. This is Sean." Emma looked over her shoulder at Sean, waving at him to come over from the doorway.

"Hi Sean." Shane said happily. "Are you a friend of Emma's?"

"Um," Sean was unsure of how to answer that. Emma had told him that he had a tendency to get violent when he was upset, and he wasn't sure how he would react to his daughter having a boyfriend. "Sort of."

"Sean is my boyfriend." Emma said, hoping he would take it well.

"Like me and Spike?" Shane asked.

"Well, yeah." Emma told him.

Shane stood abruptly and hugged Emma. Releasing her, he walked a little further and hugged Sean, who looked completely baffled and terrified. Emma stifled a laugh.

"Are you two going to have a baby?" Shane asked after he had let Sean go.

"No!" Emma exclaimed, horrified.

Shane looked upset again. "Why not? Spike and I had a baby. We had you."

"I know you did." she said softly. "And I'm sorry I yelled. You just surprised me with that question. I didn't mean it."

"It's okay." he said. "Don't you want a baby?"

Sean didn't know whether to laugh or not. The whole conversation was a little absurd.

And Emma appeared to be having a similar reaction to her father's questions. "Someday." she told him.

They stayed for about an hour, until it was time for Shane to go down to his arts and crafts class. He had made Sean promise to come back with Emma to visit the next weekend. He said that he would.

"You don't really have to come back with me you know. I can explain it to him." she said softly.

"I want to come back. It's obvious your dad really loves you." he slung an arm around her shoulder and squeezed her against him.

"Yeah, he does. I'm glad you got to meet him." she replied. They were at the car by that point, and Sean held the door open so she could get in. She didn't know if she would ever get used to that.

"So, about that question your dad asked us ... " Sean grinned at her lecherously.

She laughed. "Sorry. No baby for me any time soon."

"Oh well." He revved the engine and pulled out onto the highway. "How about some practice then?"

"Sean!"

"What? You're finally ungrounded and we have," he looked at his watch, "nine hours until your curfew. Plus my apartment, with no roommates, no parents, no distractions."

Emma grinned at him. No doubt he had been thinking about this for a while. It made her feel loved and wanted and she loved him for it. Unbuckling her seat belt, she slid over next to him and placed her hand on his knee. "Sean, we're almost an hour away from home."

"I know." he replied, voice a little thicker than it had been a second ago. A sardonic sense of power washed over her. Sean was reacting to her hand and she knew it. Feeling a little wicked, she slid it up his thigh slowly.

"Emma ... " he said warningly.

"What?" She began kissing his neck, her other hand tangling in his hair.

"I'm driving." he stated, jaw clenching rhythmically.

"I can see that." she nibbled at his ear lobe and he swerved. "Sean!"

"It's your fault. You're the one coming on to me while I'm driving." he said defensively.

"You started it with all of your baby talk," She hand stopped kissing him, but she kept her hand on his leg just for the pure fun of tormenting him.

Sean turned serious despite her attempts to distract him. "Are you okay with all of this?

Me meeting your dad, you meeting my mom. I mean really okay?"

She nodded, nuzzling her face against his neck. Rain was beginning to fall outside, and it seemed cozier being nestled together inside the car. "I'm fine. I know I was nervous before, but I'm glad we did this. Now it feels like there are no more secrets or bad stuff between us. It's like we get a fresh start."

"I know what you mean." One hand came off the wheel and he slid it around her shoulders, fingers tangling in her long blonde hair. "I think it's all going to be all right this time."

"Would you mind stopping by the Dot on the way? I'm starving." she asked.

"Your wish is my command." he replied.

With a kiss on the cheek, she replied, "I'm going to hold you to that."

…0...0...0...0...0...0...

"Ugh. I'm soaked." Sean complained as the door of the Dot swung shut behind them.

"It's just water. You'll live." Emma said playfully, pulling him over to the counter. "Hey, Spin."

"Hey guys. What can I get you?" he asked.

"A veggie burger, fries, and a strawberry shake." Emma looked at Sean. "Feeling up to

trying it today?"

"No." he replied without missing a beat. "Add a cheeseburger, onion rings, and a chocolate shake to that. To go."

"You got it." Spinner said. He walked away to place the order and Emma raised her

eyebrows at Sean. "Onion rings? You better be planning to brush your teeth after you eat those."

"Why? Onion breath is so hot." He slid his arms around her waist, trying to pull her close enough to kiss. She squealed and made an attempt to escape, turning around in the process. Sean began peppering kisses down the back of her neck as she laughed, bending over to try and get him to release her.

"Sean, stop it." she gasped, out of breath from laughing so hard.

He let go finally and she kissed him sweetly. "I'm serious about the onions. If you don't, I may have to call your mother."

Sean narrowed his eyes. "You wouldn't."

"Try me. We really bonded. I did get a baby picture after all."

Sean shook his head in defeat. "Okay, I give. You win."

Smiling, she grabbed one of the to go bags Spinner had just sat on the counter. They turned to leave, and Emma's eyes fell on a back corner table. Jay and Alex had their eyes trained on them, and so did the other occupant of their table.

Ellie.

Sean's eyes followed hers, and he stiffened when he noticed his ex girlfriend. "Do you mind?"

Emma shook her head, taking the other bag from him. "I'll wait over here." She took a seat at the counter, beginning to sip at her milkshake.

A deep breath and clenched fists to calm his nerves was needed before Sean headed over to the table where Ellie and his former friends sat. "Hey." he said softly.

"Hey." Ellie replied. "I didn't know you were back."

"Yeah. Almost a week now. I'm back at Degrassi." he relied. This was way more awkward

than he had expected. And he had pictured this moment in his head more times than he could count.

"So you and Emma ... " her voice trailed off, "you guys are back together."

"Yeah. Since the summer." he confessed.

Alex snorted. Ellie glared at her, but didn't say anything. "Nice of you to let me know."

"What did you want me to say Ellie? Sorry I left you and everything, by the way, I'm back together with my ex girlfriend?"

"At least it would have been honest." she said. "She met your mother?"

Ellie's voice was cold and better. She had never used that type of tone with him before, and he felt his heart clench in sadness for what they had once had. It had been good, and now she hated him because he hadn't been able to let her in all the way. Because he had been able to let Emma in.

"I had to go back and get the reset of my stuff. I asked her to go with me."

"Well I hope you two had a fabulous time." Ellie snapped. She turned her back on him, making it all too clear that as far as she was concerned, the conversation was over.

"Whatever." he said. With a brief nod to Alex, he left.

"Hey man." Jay followed him to the counter. "I don't even get a 'hello?' What's that about?"

"It's about you neglecting to mention that you hooked up with Emma." Sean explained.

"But I guess it just slipped your mind, right?"

Jay shot an accusatory glance at Emma. "Look man, you guys were long over by then."

"Yeah, but you still shouldn't have done it. You don't date your friends' exes. It's called

loyalty. Look it up." Sean said. He took Emma's hand. "Let's get out of here."

"Whatever man. Have fun with all of those dorks you used to hang out with before." Jay called after him.

Sean slammed the door behind him. They made a mad dash for the car. Once inside, she looked at him, concerned. "Are you okay?"

"Yeah. I knew I'd run into them sooner or later. It just ... sucks." He leaned his head back against the seat, closing his eyes. "Guess I'm gonna have to give the car back. The guy only let me borrow it as a favor to Jay."

"You still have you motorcycle." she said, trying to be helpful.

"Yeah." he started the car and they drove to the apartment in silence.

They ate and unpacked everything, only saying what went where and pass the ketchup.

Sean wasn't in any better mood, and she wasn't having any luck trying to cheer him up.

"Sean, I think I'm just going to go home."

He looked genuinely confused. "What? Why?"

"Because you haven't said more than three words to me since we left the Dot. Why should I stay just so you can ignore me?" She slung her purse over her shoulder and headed for the door.

"Wait." Sean said. Her hand on the doorknob, Emma waited for him to finish. Silently, he came up behind her and wrapped his arms around her waist. "Emma, I'm sorry. It's just that ... after everything that happened today, I wasn't really prepared to see them."

"I understand that. But that's no reason for you to shut me out."

"I know. I'm sorry, I didn't mean to." Sean nuzzled his nose against her hair. "Forgive me?"

She sighed. Sean was sorry. She could tell by the tone of his voice. And she knew that he would never deliberately hurt her. Not anymore. But that didn't erase the cold shoulder routine he had been pulling for the past hour and a half.

"Emma, please." he asked. He placed a sweet kiss on the side of her neck and she felt her anger melting. If she held on to the animosity she was feeling right now, then they would just repeat the same old pattern that they always fell into. The one that led right down the path to breakups and anger and revenge. She didn't want to go there again.

"It's okay. I'm not angry." she turned in Sean's arm, wrapping her own around his neck.

"That had to be really hard on you. Jay was your beset friend. And you loved Ellie."

"Yeah, I did. But I love you now. And Jay ... I can't forgive him for what he did to you." Sean said, a hint of disgust in his voice when he said Jay's name.

"How can you not be able to forgive him, yet you forgave me?" she asked.

"Because it wasn't your fault." he stated simply.

She blanched. How could he say that? It wasn't as if he had been there.

"It's not like he forced me." Probably not the best thing to say, but with the way Sean was acting, it was like Jay had taken advantage of her and she hadn't been strong enough or smart enough to stop it. The way he said it, it was like she was too innocent to realize what a sleaze Jay had been at the time. Attitudes like that were part of the reason she had gone to the ravine in the first place.

"Like you would have ever been with him on your own. Tell me it wasn't him that came on to you first." Sean challenged.

"Fine. It was, but I still went to see him. And it was me that kept going back. I wasn't a victim Sean. And if you can forgive me, you should be able to forgive Jay."

"I can't." he insisted.

"Why not?" None of this was making any sense.

"First rule of the guy code. You don't date your friend's ex girlfriend. Even if he says it's okay. Especially if he loved her. You just don't do it. Any good friend knows that." he explained.

She nodded. "Okay. I get it. Jay stepped over the line. So, would you get upset if he dated Ellie?" she asked.

"Yeah. But you're different." His voice was soft, and she knew what he meant without him having to say it.

"I love you." Emma whispered in his ear. She kissed his cheek, hoping to get back to the mood they had been in before they ran into Jay and Ellie.

"I love you, too." Sean replied, beginning to kiss her neck. She giggled. "Am I forgiven?"

"Like you even have to ask."

"Good." He pulled back, and abruptly scooped her up in his arms. She squealed in surprise. "Sean!"

"Oh no. It's time to finish what you started in the car Ms. Nelson." he carried her toward

the bedroom, kicking the door shut with his foot.

They fell onto the bed in a tangle of limbs, laughing. Sean yanked his shirt over his head, tossing it into the corner.

"You're certainly in a hurry." she commented. Sean was removing her shoes and socks. He paused to tickle her feet to make her giggle.

"It's been over a month Em." came the response.

She held her arms out for him to come back up to her. "I know." She kissed him deeply, reveling in the feeling of just being able to be with him again.

"I love you Emma." he whispered against her lips.

She would never get tired of hearing that. "I love you, too Sean. Now can we please stop talking?"

He laughed at her surge of impatience as she began to unfasten his belt buckle. "Like I said earlier, your wish is my command."

…0...0...0...0...0...0...


	16. Chapter 16

...0...0...0...0...0...0...

The rain fell heavy against the window of Sean's bedroom. He and Emma were both dozing on and off, too sated and comfortable to even move. Sean's arm was draped casually across her stomach and she was idly playing with his fingers. She sighed contentedly.

"What's on your mind?" he asked.

"Nothing. Just wishing we could stay like this forever." she replied.

"Mmm. I know." he nuzzled his nose into her hair.

"Did you ever think, after the way we ended, that we would ever end up here?" she asked.

Sean was silent. She rolled over onto her other side to face him. He had a guilty look on his face and wouldn't meet her eyes. "Sean? What is it?"

"I don't want to say." he mumbled.

That had the potential to sound suspicious, but the tone of his voice wasn't as serious as it could have been under the circumstances so she knew it wasn't something that was going to upset her. "Sean," she repeated, a little more firmly this time, "you can tell me anything. You know that, don't you?"

He sighed deeply. "I know. It's just ... it kind of makes me feel like a creep."

Now she was beginning to get intrigued. "Tell me." He still didn't say anything. Emma thought for a minute. Then it hit her. If she really wanted to know, she would just have to fight dirty. She slid her arms slowly around his waist and up his back to curve around his shoulders. "Please." she whispered, peppering small kisses up and down his collarbone.

"That is so not fair." he whined, though he made no move to stop her.

"Tough." she responded.

"Fine." he agreed reluctantly. She released her hold just enough to pull back and look at him. "I feel like a creep because I did think, or just hoped that one day we would end up back together."

Emma's brow creased in confusion. "Why should that make you feel like a creep?"

"Because I hoped for it even when Ellie and I were still together." he admitted.

Emma was awestruck at his words. "You did?" she asked breathlessly. He nodded mutely. "I can't believe that." she rained tiny little kisses all over his face.

"Em." he complained.

"What? It was really sweet."

"You wouldn't say that if you in Ellie's shoes." he argued.

"I guess. But I'm confused about something. You and Ellie always acted like you had a perfect relationship. Why wouldn't you want to end up with her?"

"Because as much as I cared about her, and I did, there was just something there all the time between us."

Emma ran her hand up and down his arm soothingly. "What do you think it was?"

"I don't know. Now that I think back on it all, I'm not sure we really made any sense together."

"But you loved her?"

He nodded. "Yeah, I really did." Emma grimaced slightly, and he grinned. "I just knew it wasn't going to work out. We were too different."

"And we're not?" she asked.

"We're different in a good way." he replied, pulling her closer. She nestled her head underneath his chin. "How so?"

"Ellie and I were different in the simple ways. We're different in the big ways."

She pulled back and looked into his eyes as if she were looking for something he wasn't telling her. "You almost sound like a different person. What happened to you in Wasaga?"

"I read a lot. My mom always read anything she could get her hands on, and I began to read some of her philosophy ad religion stuff."

"Really?" The disbelief was evident in her voice, so much so that Sean frowned in annoyance.

"Yes, really. Why is that so hard to believe?"

The defensive tone was one that she recognized. It signaled the impending eruption. But by now, she had learned to read the signs and she was old enough to know how to avoid them rather than play to them.

"You always said that stuff like that was nonsense. In fact, I remember you saying as much to some kid who was reading a Deepak Chopra book once." That was good. It would let him know that she didn't think he wasn't smart enough to read about the deeper meanings of life, and reminded him of just how extensive their history was.

The tension visibly melted form his shoulders. The harshness in his eyes was replaced by the deep calm she had been seeing for the past few hours. "I know." he said, brushing a stray hair from her face. "But after the shooting, they helped. A lot. I even went to church a couple of times."

"If you go all Spinner Friendship Club weirdo on me …" she warned. He laughed. "I won't. It helped, but it's not for me."

"Okay. So explain the differences to me." she returned to her previous position. Sean stroked her hair as they talked. Ellie it seemed left the lid off the toothpaste. He hated that. He got yelled at frequently for somehow getting jelly in the peanut butter jar. They could never agree on what to watch on television. "But we're different." he said. They disagreed about things like the death penalty and nuclear war, but the

silly little things never managed to break through the surface and disrupt the little world they had created together. They could argue over the big things, and never loose sight if the big picture.

Sean stopped talking when he realized Emma had fallen asleep. He continued running his fingers through her hair, knowing it relaxed her and not wanting to wake her up by stopping. He began to drift off to, lulled into drowsiness by the constant patter of the rainfall and the soothing sound of Emma's quiet breathing.

...0...0...0...0...0...0...

Emma was ready to commit murder when the phone began ringing.

"Ugh." Sean complained. "Whoever that is, tell them they're lucky I can't get my hands on them right now." His voice was husky with sleep and he made no move to get up and get whatever phone it was. She realized it was hers, and jumped up to get it, throwing one of Sean's discarded shirts on that she grabbed from the floor. She found her purse lying where she had dropped it by the front door and fished it out. It was flashing 'Manny' in bright pink letters.

"Where are you?" Manny screamed.

"Manny, I need my eardrums." she complained.

"You do realize that you're supposed to be home in fifteen minutes right? Snake is standing at the window with a watch." Manny said.

"What! Oh my God." she hung up the phone and ran back into Sean's room, yanking her clothes on. "Sean! Get up."

"What?" he asked lazily from the bed.

"I have to be home in …" she looked at her phone, "twelve minutes."

"Are you kidding!" he exclaimed, jumping out of bed so quickly he nearly fell and grabbed his jeans off the floor.

They dressed in record time, both failing to notice that Emma had put her top on over Sean's tee shirt. Emma clutched her phone, staring intently at the time as they drew nearer to her house. As Manny had said, Snake was visible from the front window. She jumped out of the car and ran up the walk, unaware, or not even caring, that she had left the passenger side door open.

"I'm here." she announced, out of breath as she barreled into the living room. She had barely finished 'here' when the alarm buzzed on Snake's watch.

"Good." her mother said from the couch. "Good night."

They went upstairs and Emma looked outside, noticing Sean was closing the door. She waited for him to look at her and blew him a kiss. He returned it and she headed off to bed.

...0...0...0...0...0...0...

There was a faint tapping noise invading Emma's subconscious and she wasn't the least bit happy about it. First Manny had, thankfully, roused her from the best sleep she'd had in a while. And now she had been dreaming she was back there, curled up with Sean's heart beating next to her ear and the scent of him wafting off the sheets underneath her.

She looked around the room, but nothing seemed out of place. Yet the noise persisted. Raising up in her bed, she listened intently, trying to distinguish where it was coming from.

The window. Someone was tapping on her widow. The only ones who had ever used it besides her and Manny were Craig and Sean. And seeing that Craig was in Vancouver, she highly doubted it was him. That only left Sean.

She smiled. She would never tire of the fact that Sean wanted to be around her. That he couldn't wait to see her and came to wake her up in the middle of the night.

She was just opening the window when she realized something was wrong. The last time Sean had come to her window in the dead of night, he had been standing a few feet back, enough space to let her recognize him and still get out of the window. Now he was lying on the ground, close enough to touch the glass without really moving his hand that far. Why was he laying on the ground in front of her window?

Pushing it open enough to crawl out, she understood why. He was laying there because he had to.

"Sean." she whispered, taking in the sight of his ace, the face she loved so much, marred by bruises and blood. "Sean." she said again, louder with the panic that was beginning to overtake her body. She screamed for Manny, trying to wipe away the blood from Sean's eyes enough to get him to look at her. Manny came to the window, and with one look at Sean took off up the stairs, waking Spike and Snake

on her way to unlock the door.

Snake helped Emma hold Sean up so he could get in the house. Collapsing on the couch, he would have fallen over if Emma hadn't sat down beside him to hold him up. Spike opened the first aid kit from the bathroom and handed Emma an antibacterial wipe and a wet cloth. She gingerly touched the cloth to a large gash over his left eye. He hissed at the contact.

"Sorry." she whispered. "Sean, what happened? Who did this?"

"I don't know." His voice was raspy and hollow. Everyone in the room recognized the effort it was taking just for him to talk. "I was getting back in my car and these three guys just came up and jumped me. I

think there was another one. But he was further back, just ... watching."

"You've been out there all this time?" she asked, looking over his head to meet her parents' eyes. It had been nearly three hours since he'd dropped her off.

"Yeah. I blacked out sometime after they left. I got over to the window as soon as I came to." He flinched as Emma rubbed the antibiotic on the deep cut running across his chin.

The blood continued to flow from the wound. "Sean, this is going to need stitches. We need to get you to the hospital."

He shook his head. "I'm fine." He tried to straighten up his slouched posture to make his injuries appear less severe, but all the movement did was cause him to grab his side in pain.

"That's it." Emma declared, standing up. "Snake will you take us to the hospital?"

"Of course."

Sean tried to protest, but she refused to listen. "Sean, please. For me." He reluctantly agreed. She sighed. There was a sinking feeling that she couldn't explain, that this wasn't over, even though here wasn't much else that someone could do to him that would be worse than this.

...0...0...0...0...0...0...

Emma thought she would go crazy during the hour it took the doctors to examine Sean. The emergency nurse had taken one look at him, being held up and bleeding profusely, and sent him straight back to a room. Emma had filled out as much of his form as possible. Name, birthday, chicken pox, family history of heart disease. Other than that, she was at a loss.

Her heart broke in a million pieces when she finally saw the extent of what had been done to him. He was facing the opposite wall, sitting with his fists clenched, his back exposed to her. There was a large purple bruise behind his right shoulder, one on his lower back, and a cut high on his shoulder blade.

"I know you're there." he said without turning around.

She came around to stand in front of him, gasping when she finally saw the rest of his injuries. His ribs were bandaged, yet the large black and blue marks were still visible around the edges of the gauze. There

was a horrible mark over his sternum and a huge gas across his left forearm. The knuckles and palms of both hands were scratched and bandaged beyond recognition.

But the worst was his face. In addition to the large cut, now covered over his eye and the sutured gash on his chin, he was sporting a spilt lip, a black eye and a deep bruise tinged with yellow on his right cheek. "Oh Sean." she whispered, raising he hand to the bruise over his heart, but stopping before she touched it. The last thing she wanted was to cause him more pain.

"Six stitches, five cracked ribs, and a sprained wrist." he told her, showing off the injury in question with his bandaged hand.

She placed her hands tentatively on his cheeks. "I'm so sorry this happened to you."

"Sean Cameron?"

They turned to see a police officer enter the cubicle. Emma was asked to leave so he could get a statement.

"I hate seeing him in pain." she said when she felt rather than heard Snake walk up behind her.

"I know you do." he said. After a few seconds he added, "The doctors said he should be watched carefully for the nest 48 hours to make sure he doesn't have a concussion. I think he should come stay with us."

She thought so too. But Sean refused. "Then I'm staying with you."

"Emma." Snake began, in hopes of dissuading her.

"No. You said yourself he needs to be watched. I'm not leaving him alone."

He recognized the determined glint in his step daughter's eyes and knew it would take something much more powerful than him to change her mind. "Fine." he agreed. "I'll go call your mother."

...0...0...0...0...0...0...

Sean was up the entire night. Nothing could ease the pain he was in, and he refused to take the painkillers that he had been prescribed. Emma sat up, holding hi hand while he breathed through the pain of just

breathing.

"I have an idea." she announced.

"What?" he asked quickly. He was in such agony; he was desperate for anything to take his mind off of it.

She got the baby picture of him that was still in her purse and a ticket stub that she carried in her wallet with her spare house key that she had kept form their first date. "I have other stuff, but this is all I have on me."

"For what?" he asked, too miserable to guess.

"I think we should make a scrapbook."

"Why?"

"To give to our kids or grandkids someday." she said. He smiled warmly at her despite the pain. "Sounds like a great idea."

"I have more pictures at home, napkins from the dances we went to together. Flowers from my mom are wedding ... "she trailed off thinking about what else she had that would work.

"Hand me my wallet." he said. Confused, she retrieved it from the jeans she had helped him change out of.

He opened it and pulled out the worn, folded picture of the two of them on their first date that Spike had taken. "You kept it all this time?" Emma was touched by the gesture, and tears began to well up.

"Don't cry." he pleaded.

"They're happy tears."

He held a hand out to her. She took it, sitting beside him on his bed and looking deeply into the eyes she knew better than her own. He kissed her knuckles sweetly before he spoke. "Em, promise me something."

"Anything." she said, meaning it with her entire heart and soul.

"Whatever happens from here on out, remember this moment and know that I love you."

A cold, ominous feeling washed over her at the hidden emotions in his voice. "I don't think I like the sound of that."

"Promise?"

"Okay. I promise." she reluctantly agreed.

"Good. Because I love you. But I'm going to find out who did this. And why." he said.

"You'll be careful?" she asked.

Sean nodded. "You better be. Because I'm not losing you again." Emma said fiercely.

"You won't. You and me, we're in this together."

She smiled at him, leaning over to kiss him gently. "Forever."

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	17. Chapter 17

_**A/N: Complete? I don't know the meaning of the word. I reached my word goal which is why I ended it where I did, but I felt like it needed more and this is much easier than staring a sequel. I'm still revising it though, so things in the earlier chapters may change. And I noticed that I left out the end of chapter 12 before, so I fixed that. And a big thank you to everyone who has read and reviewed so far.**_

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When Emma missed her second day of school to take care of Sean, Spike showed up at Sean's door.

Emma answered, wearing a pair of Sean's boxers and one of his tee shirts. The long, disapproving look her mother gave when she saw her spoke volumes of the level of anger she was running at.

Without waiting for an invitation, Spike walked past Emma into the apartment. "One day Emma. I said you could miss ONE DAY to stay home and take care of Sean."

Sean was asleep in his room, or was supposed to be. Emma looked nervously toward his door, straining to hear any signs of movement from within to indicate if they had woken him up. In doing so, she pretty much ignored her mom, causing her already flared temper to soar even higher.

"Don't you have anything to say for yourself?" she demanded.

"Mom, Sean's asleep." Emma hissed.

This was apparently the wrong thing to say. One of the surefire signs that Spike's anger

was getting the best of her was the way her eyes would narrow into slits, which they were doing right then. She took a deep breath to collect herself before speaking again. "Emma, you can not skip school so you and your boyfriend can stay home and have sex all day."

"Are you serious? Mom, you are way off here." Emma said. She felt as if she were living in some alternate reality type of dream world. There was no way in actual life her mother would have just said that to her.

"Am I?" Spike asked, raking her eyes over her daughter's clothes again, this time a bit more obviously.

"Mom!" she exclaimed. "Just because I'm wearing Sean's clothes doesn't mean ..." she stop and took a breath, calming before she got herself seriously grounded. "Didn't you **see** Sean the other night? He can barely move even now. That's why I'm still here. To take care of him so he doesn't hurt himself even worse."

Emma could almost see the wheels in her mom's head turning, processing her words and

piecing everything together. "Okay." she said finally. "I believe you."

All the tension left Emma's body immediately. "Thank you."

"How is Sean doing?"

Emma sighed. "Not too good actually. He's still in a lot of pain, but he won't take the medication the doctor prescribed. He won't even let me get it filled. Just breathing is painful for him." She ran her hands through her hair in frustration. "I keep trying to get him to talk about it but he refuses. And he gets so angry whenever I have to do something for him." She sat on Sean's old tattered couch. She had been beyond happy when she had first come over and seen it right where it had been the first time she was there. She had a lot of good memories attached to that couch.

Spike sat and wrapped an arm around Emma's shoulders. "Men. They're all the same. It'll get easier."

"Promise?"

Spike laughed at the exasperation in her daughter's voice. "Promise. In a few days Sean will be good as new."

"Good. It'll be nice to have my boyfriend back."

"Well, since I know now that everything's okay, I'll head on home. But Manny will be by later with a change of clothes and your books for tomorrow." She stood, pulling her purse over her shoulder.

"But Mom..." Emma cried.

Spike held a hand up to silence her. "Em, you can't miss another day of school. Period."

"But Sean can't be by himself right now."

"Then you better think of something." With that, she left and Emma was left standing in the middle of the living room with her mouth hanging open.

...0...0...0...0...0...0...

"So you come up with a plan yet?" Manny asked.

Emma sighed and took her bag that Manny had brought over. "I think so. JT doesn't care if he misses class so he's gonna hang out with Sean tomorrow until lunch, then Toby's taking over until I get here. And believe me that was not easy to arrange."

"I bet." Manny sat on the couch and Emma got her a soda. "What about after that?"

"Well," Emma said slowly, dreading Manny's reaction to her idea, "I was kind of hoping that you and Liberty could take over. After that Sean should be okay to come back to school." She added the last part quickly, hoping it would make it all sound better.

Apparently it didn't.

"What? You want me and Liberty to baby-sit Sean?"

Emma frowned. 'It's not babysitting Manny. It's me hoping that two of my best friends would want to help a friend of theirs who's in a lot of pain at the moment and needs it."

"Geez, enough with the guilt trip. You convinced me. Liberty on the other hand ..." Manny trailed off.

Emma waved her hand dismissively. "Already taken care of. You know Liberty has always liked Sean, and she's happy to help. Gives her someone she thinks she can boss around."

"Am I morning or evening shift?"

"Evening."

"Kay. See you in school tomorrow. Tell Sean I said hi." She got up and left, leaving

Emma to the mountain of homework she had acquired in the two days she'd been gone. Whoever said senior year was easy lied.

It took almost three hours, but she finally finished and bleary eyed and exhausted, she crept into Sean's room to find him sound asleep in the same position he'd been in before her mom arrived. Breathing a sigh of relief, she set the alarm clock and crawled into bed next to him.

Instinctively, Sean rolled over and draped an arm around her waist, his nose buried in her hair. She smiled, pulling his arm tighter around her. Before sleep overtook her, Emma thought this would be a good way to go to sleep for the rest of her life.

...0...0...0...0...0...0...

Emma was on her way out of last period when her phone began to ring. Afraid it was

Toby telling her something was wrong with Sean, she answered quickly, the books in her

hands scattering all over the floor. "Toby?"

"No, it's your mother." Spike's voice said cheerfully. "Can you stop and get some milk on your way home?"

"I guess, but that may not be for a while. I'm on my way to see Sean."

"Em, I'd really appreciate it if you came here first." Spike said calmly. Emma hated when her mom tried so hard to be rational. It made her feel like a kid that couldn't understand the logic behind the arguments.

"Fine." Emma snapped and hung up the phone. She dialed Toby's phone without even taking a breath. He answered sounding a little worse for the wear.

"Toby, what's wrong?"

"Have you failed to notice your boyfriend's a real grouch?" he said sarcastically.

Emma smiled in relief. "He's in a lot of pain Toby. Whatever he's said or done, just ignore it okay?"

"Easier said than done." he muttered.

Suppressing a smile, Emma said her goodbyes, ignoring his complaints at the news that she was going to be late, and headed out the front doors. She knew Sean wouldn't be happy about her getting their friends to watch him while she was in school, but it made her feel better about leaving him so he'd given in. JT had shown up after lunch declaring that she owed him big for 'playing nanny to that surly, whining brat of an ex-con boyfriend of hers' and that he'd never do it again. She had tried to warn him about preventing Sean from watching Family Guy was a bad idea. It was his own fault Sean had thrown the remote at him.

...0...0...0...0...0...0...

"Mom, I'm here." Emma called, putting the milk in the fridge.

"Em?" Spike appeared in the kitchen doorway. "Good. I need to talk to you."

Uh-oh. Her mom wanting to talk was never a good thing.

"Okay." she sat down reluctantly at the kitchen table, her mother sitting down opposite

her, a baby monitor between them.

"I know we've talked about this before, but I really feel like this is a good time to really

discuss things we haven't gone into before." Spike began. Emma began to worry, confusion clouding her mind as to what they could be talking about here.

Her mother reach over and took her hand. "Honey, I know you care about Sean very much. And you might be beginning to think about taking that next step with him."

"Mom!" she cried. "We do not need to have another sex talk."

"I realize you may think that, but honey there are a lot of consequences about sex that you may not recognize yet."

"This is so not happening." Emma said, more to herself than to her mom.

"Now, it's only natural at your age when you think you love someone..." Spike began but

Emma cut her off. "Mom, there's no thinking involved. I do love Sean."

"Em," she said, a slight condescending lilt to her voice, "you're seventeen."

"And that means I can't possibly be mature enough to know my own feelings?" She jerked

her hand out of her mom's grasp, standing up from the table so fast she knocked the chair backwards.

"Of course not. I just think that maybe you're letting your hormones cloud your

judgment."

They were in the living room by then, Emma heading for the door and Spike trying to stop her from leaving. Emma stopped abruptly and whirled on her. "I love Sean Mom. I would die for him. He every nearly could have died for me. Doesn't that say anything to you?"

"It says that he obviously cares a lot about you." she answered, unsure of whether or not she could say what Emma wanted to hear.

"He loves me."

"So he says."

Emma recoiled as if her mother had slapped her. "You think Sean is just saying he loves me so I'll have sex with him, is that it? And you're afraid that I'll make some huge mistake and get pregnant just like you did? Is that it Mom?"

"It has crossed my mind." she admitted. "I want something more for you honey."

"Something more than having a guy that really loves me? Because he does. I can feel it every time he's around me. He **loves** me." she repeated.

Spike took hold of her hands. "I just don't want to see you get your heart broken again sweetheart."

"I won't." Emma said firmly, believing it that moment more than she ever had before.

...0...0...0...0...0...0...

"Em, promise me that you'll never leave me alone with JT or Toby ever again." Sean

pleaded as she snuggled down in the bed next to him.

"Well, if you're going to miss more school ..." she said playfully.

"Tomorrow is my last day off. After that I'm going back. Promise." he said.

"Okay. Cause tomorrow is Liberty and Manny." she told him. He groaned.

"Hey, there's no way that could be worse than what I just had to endure." she said.

"And what would that be?"

"My mom just tried to have 'the talk' with me." she explained. "It was horrible."

He laughed, then grabbed his side in pain. "Oh, don't make me laugh Em."

"It's not funny. I swear, if I hadn't left when I did she would have asked me point blank if you and I were having sex." she complained, rubbing his side tenderly where he had grabbed it.

Sean's expression turned serious. "What would you have said?"

She exhaled a long, deep breath. "I don't want to lie to her. You're a huge part of my life and I'm proud of that. There's no reason to hide anything about our relationship."

"But ..." he pressed.

"I just have this gut feeling that if she knew, she would do whatever she could to keep me from seeing you anymore." Emma confessed.

An odd look of amazement and disbelief passed over Sean's face. "Em, come on. Your mom has always wanted you to be independent and to make your own decisions."

"I know. But she thinks that I'm too wrapped up in you and my hormones to think clearly. She's terrified that I'm gonna get pregnant just like she did."

With much effort, Sean sat up, supporting his weight on his hands. "She said that?"

Emma scoffed, sitting up beside him and wrapping an arm around his waist to help support him. "Of course not. But I know my mom. Me getting pregnant is like her worst fear."

"You don't think ..." he struggled to find the right words. "You don't think she'd really try to keep us apart, do you?"

"I don't know." Emma admitted. "She's always been pretty protective. If she thinks she's protecting me, there's no way to know what she would do."

...0...0...0...0...0...0...

_**A/N: Yeah, not my best work. I just wanted to get it up before I really get into the revising. Remember, this is subject to change. Don't say you weren't warned. :)**_


	18. Chapter 18

_**A/N: Short one, not a lot of time for a lengthy update. Sorry.**_

...0...0...0...0...0...0...

Manny and Liberty's day with Sean went much smoother, mainly because, being girls, Sean wasn't about to throw things at them. Emma got there without any impromptu calls from her mother and helped Sean catch up on some of the work he had missed during his absence. And he was being less than easy going about it.

"They're trying to kill me." he said when he threw his pencil down in frustration during the

second hour of math.

"What do you say we just quit for the night? You have until Monday to finish this stuff." Emma offered.

"Sounds like a plan to me."

That morning before she had left for school, Emma had packed a bag with enough clothes to get her through the weekend and had told her mom she was going to stay with Sean until Monday. Spike hadn't been happy about it, but had reluctantly agreed only because she knew Sean had a doctor's appointment on Monday and was sure he would be given a clean bill of health.

"My eyes are so blurry." he complained as he flopped down onto his bed.

Emma sat beside him, running her fingers through his hair. "Are you sure you're up to going back to school tomorrow?"

"I don't really want to, but I know the sooner I do the better." he said.

"When did you get to be so …"

"Wise?" he tried.

"Sensible." she corrected.

"I resent that."

"Sorry." she leaned over and kissed his nose, her hair falling in a curtain around them.

Sean inhaled deeply. He had always loved the smell of her hair. Before she pulled away, he placed his hands on either side of her face, bringing her lips down to his. Before either of them knew it things had moved along, and Emma was tugging on the hem of Sean's shirt.

He raised his arms about halfway and grunted in pain. Emma pulled back abruptly.

"What's wrong?"

"Nothing." he said, trying to pull her back to him.

She resisted. "Sean. I heard you. You're obviously in pain, tell me."

He shook his head, teeth clenched in discomfort and aggravation. "It's just my ribs. No big deal."

"It is too a big deal. Why didn't you tell me they still hurt?" she demanded.

Sean shrugged. "No reason to."

That hurt. Emma looked down at her hands, refusing to let Sean see the wounded expression she knew was in her eyes. He didn't need it right then. All he needed from her was love and support so he could get well.

Sean knew the way Emma had interpreted his words and hated himself for hurting her once again, however unintentional it might have been. "Em, I didn't mean it like that."

"It's okay." she said, placing a hand on his cheek.

"No, it's not." he said. "I meant that I didn't want you to worry any more than you already are. It can't be good for you."

"What do mean for me? Sean, I'm not the one that was beaten up." she said.

"But you're recovering, too. You don't need any extra stress right now."

To say that Emma was surprised was an understatement. She had barely talked about her illness with Sean since that first night on the bench, mainly because she was embarrassed to admit to him that she had let herself fall apart like that. He had only brought it up twice, once when she couldn't finish a slice of pizza and when she had to go to an appointment with her shrink. The rest of the time they pretty much ignored the entire subject. So the idea that he thought about it even when they weren't discussing it pretty much made her melt completely.

"Sean, I'm doing okay. You don't need to worry about me."

His brow creased like it always did when he heard something he didn't like. "So basically

you're saying that you can worry about my injuries that'll be gone in a week, but I shouldn't worry about a condition that you could be fighting for possibly the rest of your life? Doesn't sound very fair to me."

Sean laughed when Emma's mouth dropped open at his comment. She closed it quickly at his chuckling. "Fine, worry all you want," she said, "but I can too."

"Deal." He let his eyes travel back over her frame. Her cheeks were still flushed from their earlier activities and her lips remained slightly swollen. Added to their conversation, he was flooded with some very ... affectionate feelings.

Emma noted the mischievous twinkle that popped up in Sean's eyes and narrowed her eyes at him. "What?"

"Before all of that, we were in the middle of something." he reminded her, sliding his hand

down her neck in that way he knew she couldn't resist.

"Yes, we were," she admitted as she pulled away, "but Sean, if you're in pain ..."

"I'm not." he insisted. Emma raised her eyebrows skeptically. "Okay, so certain things hurt a bit. I just won't do them."

"Like taking your shirt off?" she asked.

Pondering for a moment, Sean got up and dug around in a drawer for a minute before

returning with a pair of scissors. He handed them to her.

Emma looked from them to Sean, puzzled. "Just what am I supposed to do with these?"

"You don't want me to raise my arms, so we improvise." he explained, a smirk gracing his lips.

It finally dawned on her what he was suggesting. "Sean, I'm not cutting your shirt off."

...0...0...0...0...0...0...

Jay was so drunk he wasn't about to move from the comfy spot he'd staked out in front of the bonfire. But not so drunk that he wouldn't remember the events unfolding around him come morning. The same could not be said for those around him.

"It went better than expected."

The three guys to his left were bragging about a job they'd done the previous weekend.

Those guys were bad news. And coming form Jay that really meant something. They were hopped up on a dozen different kinds of steroids and were willing to do just about anything to make a quick buck.

"That guy, man he had no idea what was coming." One of the meatheads said. "He was just dropping his girlfriend off and then BAM!" The guy smacked his fist into his palm and the others laughed. "Don't know where that skinny little kid got two grand, but it was well worth it."

"But didn't you feel bad, beating up some kid just because his girlfriend dumped some little rich boy to go out with him?" The girl hanging on meathead number two's arm was renowned for her quote 'easiness' and also her lack of brightness. Jay usually tuned out everything she said on principle alone. It was one of the only principles he had. But something about the story caught his attention.

"Yeah," the final giant added, "if he hadn't been in some nice little neighborhood we would have jacked his car, too. Man it was sweet. Orange and all tricked out. Nice"

Jay hadn't wanted to move. But he did. Because he had someone he needed to talk to.

...0...0...0...0...0...0...


	19. Chapter 19

...0...0...0...0...0...0...

"Aren't you glad you listened to me?" Sean asked huskily.

"Mm-hm." Emma murmured, rubbing her hand down his face. "I should listen to you more often." Emma was sitting up in the bed wearing the button down denim shirt Sean had discarded while Sean himself was simply laying under the sheet while Emma ran her nimble fingers anywhere she took a notion to. "I didn't hurt you did I?" she asked, a slight blush creeping up her face.

Sean laughed. "Nope. And even if you had, I wouldn't have cared. I like it when you get all ... enthusiastic like that."

Groaning, She buried her face in her hands. "It was those darn scissors."

Sean glanced over at the shreds of his shirt tossed haphazardly on the floor. "Good thing it wasn't one of my favorites."

"You are so not funny."

"But I'm cute." he retorted. 'Come here" Reaching out for her arm, he pulled her back down on top of him. Giggling, Emma complied. Sean kissed her sweetly, tugging on her lower lip in that way she loved.

"I'm not hurting you, am I?" she asked worriedly.

"No. Now stop worrying."

"Can't help it." she told him as she buried her fingers in his hair. "Worrying about you is like second nature to me. Has been for quiet some time now."

"I love you." Sean said.

Emma raised her eyebrows. She adored hearing him say that, but it was kind of ... random. The mood had been light and playful, and he had changed it with his words and the serious tone that accompanied them.

"I love you, too." she said slowly.

"Sorry to spoil the mood, but what you said, it just kind of hit me hard." Sean apologized. He pushed a stray hair out of her face, running his finger down her cheek. She smiled softly as she thought about the first time he'd done that. They had been fourteen and watching television on her couch while her parents were out for the night. A tug of war for the remote had resulted in their first actual make out session and Sean had run his finger down her cheek just like he was doing right then. She melted just the same way she had almost four years earlier.

"Monday is going to suck." he said.

"That was out of nowhere."

Sean shook his head, sighing. "After the doctor says I'm okay, there's no way your mom is going to let you stay over here anymore."

Emma felt her good mood evaporate. He was right. Spike had gone into super strict mode ever since he had moved back; it was highly unlikely that she would even allow Emma to be over there at all after he was healed. Especially given her newfound fear that they were having sex. "You're right." She buried her head against his chest and his arms came around her naturally. He kissed the top of her head and she wished they could stay that way forever.

Sean sighed. "I wish you were eighteen already."

Emma raised her head up and looked at him. "Where did that come from?"

"If you were, then you could move in." he stated simply.

Emma pushed herself up and sat beside him once more. "Move in? As in living together?"

Sean sat up beside her. "Yeah. Think how great it would be. Going to sleep in the same bed together every night, no curfews, total privacy. We can just ... be together."

"It sounds amazing, but ..." she trailed off.

"But what?"

"Sean, I'm don't think I'm ready for that." she confessed.

"Em ..."

"I love being with you, don't get me wrong," she interjected hastily, "and I definitely see you as the biggest part of my future, but living together? Now?"

"Why not?" he asked, brow creased in confusion and maybe a touch of anger.

"We're too young. I know you lived with Ellie, but ..."

"This has nothing to do with Ellie." he said furiously. "Those were totally different circumstances. This is about my wanting to be with you as much as I can."

Emma took a deep breath. They seemed to have argued themselves into a corner, and there was only one way to get out of it. She had to try to reason with Sean-if he would listen.

"Sean, once I am eighteen I can do what I want. Meaning I can stay over when I want. But I think we should hold off on talk of cohabitation until we've got everything else out of the way. Maybe I'll be ready by then."

Whenever Sean got upset or angry his shoulders would tighten the way they had just been. At her words, they visibly relaxed. He looked down, away from her before speaking. "I didn't mean to get so upset."

"It's okay. I get it."

"Yeah." He looked uncomfortable for a minute. "Can we go to sleep now? Don't know about you, but I'm beat."

"Sounds good." She peeled the sheet back and slid under, pulling the blanket up over them. Sean hesitated briefly before snuggling up behind her. Reaching back, Emma grabbed his hand and pulled it around her, bringing his hand up over her heart. She felt him relax completely behind her and they settled down for the night…

... only to hear a loud banging at the front door.

Sean groaned and threw back the covers to go answer the door.

"Sean!"

He stopped. "What?"

"You can't answer the door." He looked at her blankly as if to say _'It's my place.'_

"You're naked." she clarified for him.

He looked down and realized she was right. Cursing under his breath, he began hunting for his clothes. With a roll of her eyes, Emma went to answer the door, ignoring Sean's protests that she was only wearing his shirt.

The pounding continued. Emma threw the door open causing Jay to stumble into the living room and almost fall down the steps. "Jeez Greenpeace, you could have killed me."

The smell of beer and cigarette smoke floated off him in waves, and it turned Emma's stomach. "Are you drunk?"

"No." he shook his head, causing him to nearly topple over once again. She eyed him skeptically and he sighed. "Fine. Maybe just a little, but I had to talk to Sean."

"Then talk." Sean said from behind them. He had found his jeans, but he wasn't wearing a shirt or shoes. Jay looked at with a huge smirk then studied Emma, taking his time raking his eyes over her bare legs and the stretch of skin exposed where her shirt was undone. "If I'm interrupting something I can just go."

"Say what you came to say and get out." Sean snapped. He had reached them by then and stepped protectively in front of Emma to shield her from Jay's lecherous gaze.

"Fine, fine. Continue with your little tryst. Just thought you'd want to know ..." he paused purposely, as if begging them to draw it out of them.

"Dude, are you so drunk you can't remember why you came here?" Sean asked the impatience evident in his voice.

"No." Jay said defensively. "I came here to tell you that I know who beat you up."

Emma's heart stopped. This was big. And from the look of worry on Jay's face as he took in Sean's expression, it was also going to get bad.

Very bad.

...0...0...0...0...0...0...


	20. Chapter 20

_**I admit it; the first part's not too great. Sorry.**_

...0...0...0...0...0...0...

Jay refused to tell Sean what he'd heard. And despite his injuries, he still managed to pin Jay against the door by the throat.

"Tell me." he gritted out between clenched teeth.

"Sean." Emma wrapped her hands around Sean's arm, trying in vain to pull him off of Jay. His grip tightened and Jay was beginning to turn red from the lack of oxygen. "Sean," she screamed again, "you're going to kill him."

The realization seemed to strike him and he let go abruptly, sending Jay falling to the floor gasping for breath.

"Sorry man." Sean said quietly.

"It's okay." Jay replied in a raspy voice. He cleared his throat before continuing. "Look, I'm not trying to be a jerk here. But if I tell you what I know, you're going to go out and do something stupid. If you just wait awhile, after you're all healed up and everyone's forgotten about this, then I'll tell you. And I'll help you get even."

Sean was silent for a moment, taking in Jay's offer. Emma prayed he accepted. There was no way he could fight anyone on the condition he was in. And she knew Sean, that's what he wanted to do. Finally, he nodded. "Okay."

Jay nodded in return. "Yeah. So I'll see you around?" The question in it was obvious, as was the intent. Could Sean forgive him?

Sean glanced over at Emma. She could almost see what was going through his head. She had been with Jay. Sort of. She had touched him and kissed him and Jay had, in his mind, taken advantage of her when she was vulnerable. But it was over and she was with him now. She didn't want Jay, and it was unlikely that Jay wanted her. Should he risk it? She smiled at him. His smile. The one she only gave him. And he knew that.

He turned back to Jay. "Yeah. Sure." he said.

Jay nodded silently, acknowledging the meaning and turned to leave. Emma wondered briefly if he'd even remember it the next day.

...0...0...0...0...0...0...

Monday morning came and Sean went to the doctor, receiving the news he expected. He was fine. He broke the news to her without the joy that should have accompanied it. Because they knew the

inevitable. Spike refusing to let her stay over anymore.

The week went by without any major news except for Manny suddenly deciding she wanted a huge birthday party. "I am turning 18 after all." she said sulkily when Emma complained that it was too short

notice for a party. "Your birthday is Saturday."

Manny won however and Emma and Liberty spent the next four days so absorbed in party plans that Emma failed to notice something pretty important. Something she should have noticed.

Sean called Friday night to say that he had to miss the party. Tracker was in Wasaga and wanted to see him before he left. She told him it was fine, and while she was disappointed that he would be gone a

whole day, a part of her was relieved.

She hadn't been able to get a minute alone all day. Manny and her mom had kept her so busy cleaning and decorating that she hadn't stopped once. Liberty's arrival had only added to it. The party had been going on for almost two hours when she finally found herself off to the side, with no one trying to talk to her. Everybody noticed she was distracted and figured she was just missing Sean. Unnoticed, she slipped downstairs.

Or she thought it had been unnoticed.

Coming out of her bathroom, she jumped when she saw JT sitting on her bed.

"What are you doing?" she demanded, heart racing at knowing he could have caught her.

"I could ask you the same thing." he replied.

"What are you talking about?"

"You, sneaking off to the bathroom after three bites of cake is what I'm talking about." he told her, his voice more harsh than normal.

Part of her anxiety melted away. He didn't know. But at the same time, her anger flared at JT's implications of her making herself sick again. "You think I'm down here throwing up?"

"Why else would you have snuck off down here like that?" he asked like it was the most natural thing in the world to assume your lifelong friend was lying to you.

"It's none of your business." she snapped.

He stood up and headed to the stairs. "I'm sure your mom will think it's her business."

She panicked. Her mom couldn't know. "JT wait." She grabbed his arm, stopping him right before he made it to the stairs. "I'm not making myself sick, but you can't tell my mom."

"Why not?"

She hesitated and he made to go for the stairs again. "Okay. I'll tell you, but you have to swear not to say a word to anyone. Even Manny."

JT noted the scared look in her eyes, and with her not wanting Manny to know whatever it was he knew he had no choice but to agree. "All right. I promise."

"I came down here because it's the only time today I've had free. And there's something I needed to do in private."

He waited for her to say what it was, but she didn't. "And that would be?" he prodded once he realized it was necessary.

She took a deep breath to calm her nerves. She couldn't believe she actually had to tell JT of all people about this. "I cam down here ..."

He nodded, trying to draw it out of her.

"I came down here to take a pregnancy test." she blurted out.

JT's mouth dropped open. Under other circumstances, she might have found it funny. Now, it just made her realize just how huge this actually was. "Y-you're pr-pregnant?" he stuttered.

Emma shrugged. "Don't know yet. I have to wait ten minutes."

Shaking his head, JT stepped off the stairs toward her. "Do you think there's a good chance you might be?"

Emma walked over and sat on her bed. "I don't know. I'm almost a week late, and I'm never late. Not once in almost five years have I ever been even a day off."

He exhaled deeply and sat beside her. "No wonder you're freaked."

"You have no idea."

"I think I may have an inkling. I mean, Liberty was three months along before she told me, but the idea of just waiting to find out ... you must be terrified." He wrapped an arm around her shoulders, pulling her against him. Her head on his shoulder, she whispered, "I don't know how I'm going to tell Sean. This ... this will kill him."

"He loves you Em." JT said reassuringly.

"I know. And I love him. But after everything he's been through, the news that he knocked up his teenage girlfriend ... it may just push him over the edge. I don't know what he'll do." she confessed.

"But you might not be." he offered, trying to be helpful.

"I hope I'm not."

"But what if you are? What are you going to do?"

She pulled away, rubbing her face with her hands. "There's only one thing I can do. Have the baby and raise it."

"You don't have to. Especially since you sound less than thrilled about it."

"I do have to." she told him. A defiant look came into her eyes. "If I'm pregnant, then I'm going to be a mom. I won't have an abortion. I could never give my baby to strangers, no offense; I would want to be with it every single day."

"Em, seventeen is too young to be a mother."

"It happens. Everyday. And to girls a lot younger than me. I could do it." she insisted.

"Okay. If that's what you want."

"It's not. But it might very well be what is." she said.

A few seconds of silence followed. Emma watched the second hand on her watch move achingly slow toward her fate. JT fidgeted nervously. Finally he said, "Do you want to go get someone for you? Your mom? Manny? Liberty?"

She shook her head. "My mom would kill me. She's been on this "you're too young for sex" kick ever since Sean came back, and Manny and Liberty, I know this sounds weird but, it kind of feels like it

would be bad luck."

"And I'm not?" he asked teasingly.

She smiled. "You're different. But then I always knew that."

The hands on her watch finally reached the right time. "Okay." she breathed, but made no move to get up. She just looked at her bathroom door in terror.

"Em?"

"My future is on the other side of that door." she whispered.

JT had been holding her hand, and he squeezed it reassuringly. "Want me to go look?"

She turned to him, relief written all over her face. "Would you?"

"What am I looking for?" he asked in lew of an answer. Like she really had to ask.

"A plus or minus sign."

Patting her hand, he got up. Ten seconds passed. Then twenty. After nearly forty-five, she couldn't take it anymore. "JT it's not exactly rocket science."

"Well, you hid it pretty well." he said, coming out with it in his hand.

"I didn't want to risk someone coming down here and seeing it. Sorry. What does it say?" she bit her nails nervously.

"You know how I always tell you that it's good how you're so positive?"

"You never say that." she said. Of all the times for him to try to be clever, he had to pick now?

"Well, I meant to. But the point is this is one time I'm absolutely thrilled to say you are so negative." He held the stick up for her to see. There it was, a hug red minus.

Shocked, she just stared at it. Minus. Negative. Not pregnant. Once it sank in, she jumped up and threw her arms around JT.

"Thank you so much for being here with me." she whispered in his ear.

"Of course." he said. "Now," he pulled back, grinning at her, "let's go party."

...0...0...0...0...0...0...

Sean opened his door that night with a huge smile on his face. He hadn't been away from Emma more than overnight since he'd moved back. He couldn't believe how much he had missed her. "Hey."

"Hey yourself." she replied, throwing her arms aroung his neck and kissing him passionately.

Sean pulled back. "Whoa. What is that for?"

"I just missed you. That's all." she replied, kissing him again. And agian he pulled away. "What?"

"What's wrong?"

"Nothing." she said.

"Emma, you can't lie to me. There's is too something wrong. You wouldn't be acting like this if there weren't.

"Acting like what?"

"You'd be talking to me, not trying to jump me." he stated bluntly.

"Sorry for wanting to be with my boyfriend. I won't be making that mistake again." She made to leave, but he stepped around her in front of the door. "Sean, let me out."

"No."

"Sean."

"No. I'll pick you up and hold you hostage if I have to. You're not leaving until you tell me what's wrong." he threatened, crossing his arms over his chest.

Emma sat down on the stairs leading into the living room. "Promise me you won't get upset."

He sat beside her. "Okay."

"No. promise me." she pleaded, a desperate look in her big brown eyes that he hadn't seen in a long time.

"I promise."

"I should have told you before I did it, but I ... I took a pregnancy test today." she whispered.

Sean felt all the breath leave his body at her words. There was no way she could have just said that. No way this could have happened to them.

"I'm sorry I didn't tell you as soon as I first suspected, but I wanted to be sure before I said anything." she confessed.

"But I could have been there with you." he said in disbelief. "I would have."

"I know." she said, taking his hand in hers, "but I didn't want to worry you in case there was nothing to worry about."

"And is there? Nothing to worry about that is?" he asked anxiously.

She shook her head. "No, there's not. The test was negative."

"You're not pregnant?" he asked.

"Nope."

He hugged her tightly, exhaling huge breaths of relief into her hair. Kissing her cheek, he whispered, "I'm so sorry you had to do it alone."

She hesitated. Should she tell him that she in fact hadn't been alone? Deciding it was safe, she told him softly, "I wasn't. JT was with me."

He pulled back abruptly. "JT?"

"Yeah. He saw me sneak away from the party and thought I was going to throw up so he came to try and talk me out of it." She said it in a way she hoped would make him realize that it wasn't a big deal. He

had been there for her as a friend, and nothing more.

"Well, I'm glad you had someone with you, even if ..." he trailed off; the hurt and disappointment in his voice making it crack a little.

She propped her chin on his shoulder, nuzzling against his cheek. "I wish it had been you, too."

"If you had been, would we have kept it?" he asked.

"We?"

"Of course we. There's no way I would desert you. I love you Em. I would ... I would marry you. I want to someday."

"You think about stuff like that?" she asked incredulously.

"Yeah. I kind of always imagined us living here in Toronto somewhere in a little house, maybe near your folks, with a dog and a couple kids." he told her.

"I can't believe you think of things like that." she smiled, wrapping her arms around him and cuddling closer. "Do we have boys or girls?"

"One of each." he told her. "And I always thought the girl would be exactly like you. Pigtails and all."

She groaned at the memory. "Don't remind me."

"What, you were adorable." he said.

"Okay then, the boy would have to be just like you. Oh, he'd be so cute." she cute, kissing his cheek and marveling at the sight of him blushing. She giggled.

His expression turned serious. "What was that about when you first got here?"

She sighed, not ready to admit everything, but knowing that he deserved it. "I'm relieved that I'm not pregnant. I am so not ready. But tiny part of me is a little disappointed that there's no baby. For a split

second I though about what it would be like, for us to be our own little family."

Kissing her temple, he replied, "I did too for a second. But we aren't ready to be parents yet. It's sad, but it's a good thing."

"You're right. I know you're right. But still, it would have been amazing."

He kissed her again. "Yeah, it would have. And someday it will be."

...0...0...0...0...0...0...

_**A/N: Yeah, lots of dialogue this chapter. Sorry if it was hard to follow.**_


	21. Chapter 21

...0...0...0...0...0...0...

Emma was really proud that she had gotten home that night without having a major meltdown. She and Sean had continued talking about kids and why she hadn't told him sooner about her suspicions, and they had managed to finally sort everything out. She smiled as she thought of their conversation. There had been a time when a discussion of that magnitude would have resulted in a full blown scream fest. Now, they could actually talk to each other. And more than that; they could listen.

Even though they were still awake, her mom and Snake were already in bed when she got home. And given that she was fifteen minutes early, she thought they were making some progress. Hopefully, it wouldn't be long before her mother actually accepted the idea that Sean was now a permanent fixture.

Manny was sitting on her bed doing her nails when Emma went downstairs. Upon hearing Emma's footsteps, Manny closed the bottle quickly and turned to her. "You so owe me."

"For what?" Emma asked confused, taking her jacket off and rummaging for her pajamas.

"For taking the rap for your pregnancy test," Manny said.

Emma dropped her clothes as she spun around. "My mom saw it?"

"Yeah. And she was about to storm over to Sean's to kill the both of you. So I told her it was mine."

Emma released a long breath in relief. At least her mom didn't know. Sinking down onto her bed, she looked over at Manny. "Thank you so much. If my mom knew ... she'd kill me. How can I ever repay you?"

"Well, you start by giving me all the juicy details," Manny said, hopping off her bed and hobbling over to Emma's as she tried desperately not to smudge her toes.

"Manny!"

"What? You can't blame me for being curious. With all the years of build up between you two, not to mention the fact that Sean is totally hot ... " she began, but Emma cut her off again, a blush creeping up her neck. "Well he is. The biceps, those abs ... You are one lucky girl Em."

"Yeah, I am," she agreed, a smile playing over her lips as she thought about the parts of Sean that Manny had just described.

"How did he take the news?" Manny asked, a serious edge coming into her voice.

"He was relieved ... but, he was hurt that I didn't tell him sooner," she whispered.

Manny frowned. "Why didn't you tell me? I've been there you know. I could have helped you through it."

Emma sighed deeply. "I didn't want anyone to know until I found out for sure."

"You shouldn't have taken that test alone." Manny's voice was raised slightly with emotion.

Emma shushed her.

"You're gonna wake my parents up."

"Sorry. I'm just upset."

"I get that," Emma told her. "I appreciate what you did for me, but I wasn't alone. JT was with me."

"JT? You told JT, but you didn't tell me?" she accused, her eyes taking on an angry glare.

"I didn't tell him. He sort of ... found me with the test."

"Oh." Manny absorbed the words, realizing that Emma never meant to hurt her. "Sorry."

"It's okay. But how did you take the blame for it? You and Craig broke up months ago."

"I said I was dating this guy named Nick."

"Nick?"

"Yeah. He's new and really hot." Manny laughed.

Emma laughed too, glad the tension was gone. "Never doubted it."

...0...0...0...0...0...0...

Manny finally managed to wheedle a few details out of Emma, but nothing she thought Sean would be embarrassed about her knowing. Yeah, Sean was a guy but he was also very private. Especially about things like sex. She had also made Manny swear not to tell Sean that she'd told her anything.

She found Sean the next day outside working on an old car up on blocks in his yard. It looked, for lack of a better word, like a piece of junk. The only positive thing she could say about it was that it looked like it would be a nice shade of red once all the dirt and dust was cleaned off. He was underneath the car, with only his legs sticking out. She went over and pulled on the thing he was laying on. He'd told her a million times what it was called, but she could never remember.

"Hey." she said, sitting on his lap.

"Hey." he replied. He kissed her quickly, not wanting to get grease on her.

"When did you get this?"

"This morning. Since Jay and I are ... whatever, I figured it was time for a new ride. It'll be too cold for the bike soon."

"I thought you were saving the money for your shop. How much did this cost?" she asked.

"Em, that wasn't the first race I won. I have enough in savings, and I got a great deal on this." He reached behind him and patted the car fondly.

"Really?"

"Yeah, the guy had no idea what he had. I got it for three hundred." He sounded ridiculously pleased with himself.

She laughed.

"Just what exactly did he have?"

"A '67 Impala. This thing is a classic," he told her.

"I'll take your word for it." She stood up and asked him if he wanted a drink. She came back with his soda a few minutes later, to find him buried under the now open hood, bent over the engine.

"Em?"

"Yeah?" She focused her attention. Sean had taken his shirt off while she was inside and she had been distracted by admiring him.

"My mom called me this morning. She and my dad are gonna be in the city next weekend and they want to have dinner with us," he said slowly.

"They do?" she asked. She had talked to his mom a few times when she had called, but she still hadn't had any sort of contact with his dad. She had to admit she was more than a bit nervous. What if he didn't like her?

"Yeah. But if you don't want to ... "

"No," she said quickly. "I mean yes." She took a deep breath. "I mean, I want to."

He gave her a half smile that she knew all too well. He was happy, but didn't want to appear too sappy. "Great. I'll call and tell them."

She nodded. She was glad that they were finally doing this. Emma planned on being with Sean for the rest of her life, as naive as that sounded for a high school girl. She knew that eventually she'd have to meet his whole family, like he would hers, but it didn't stop the butterflies swarming in her stomach.

...0...0...0...0...0...0...

"Are you sure I look okay?" Emma asked for the third time.

"Em, you look beautiful. Just relax," Sean told her.

Sean's parents were due any minute. They were going to be staying with him while they were in town and Emma thought it would be better to have dinner there than to go out somewhere. She had even cooked the dinner herself, and was relieved that it turned out so well. She wasn't the best cook in the world. She and Manny had come over early that morning and cleaned from top to bottom while Sean sat on the couch watching cartoons and grousing about them waking him up too early. Eventually, she'd told him to either help or go away. He'd chosen the latter, and spent the remainder of the day working on his car.

"I'm just nervous," she replied, fixing the bouquet of flowers she'd placed in the center of the table again.

Sean came up behind her and wrapped his arms around her waist to stop her fussing. Pulling her back against him, he leaned his chin on her shoulder and kissed her cheek. "There's no reason to be nervous. My mom loves you."

"But what if your dad doesn't?"

"He will," he assured her.

"Tracker didn't."

"Tracker's an idiot. And he came around."

A knock sounded on the door and he let his hands slip away as he went to answer it. He tossed a reassuring smile back over at her before opening the door. She smiled back weakly.

"Sean," his mother cried, flinging her arms around him. "Oh, it's so good to see you." She released him and he hugged his father. His mom came over and hugged Emma, which surprised her, but she returned it. At least she had one parent on her side.

"Dad, this is Emma," Sean said as he lead his father over to her.

He looked her up and down appraisingly. "So you're the one my son left home for."

"Ben!" Mrs. Cameron scolded.

"Dad, come on," Sean said in a low voice.

Emma swallowed the large lump that had formed in her throat. She couldn't seem to find her voice, even if she'd had an idea of what to say to that.

"Well, it's the truth. I didn't say anything bad. I just get it now." He looked Emma over again, and she felt the heat rise to her face. Like Sean, both of his parents were wearing jeans. But she had opted for a light blue dress that Sean had always said he liked. Now, she felt overdressed and showy.

"Let's just eat," Sean said, placing his hand on the small of Emma's back and leading her to the table. His parents joined them and Emma noted the way Sean's father's eyebrows went up when Sean pulled out her chair.

"Everything looks wonderful," Mrs. Cameron said.

"Emma did all of it," Sean said warmly, taking hold of her hand and squeezing it reassuringly. She smiled at him.

"You cook?" Mr. Cameron asked.

"Yes, sir." she said, finally finding her voice.

"Sir?" he scoffed. Then, "What is it?"

"Vegetarian moussaka. My stepdad's recipe," she said.

"Vegetarian?" The disapproval was evident in his voice and in his expression, though it was directed at Sean. Clearly, he was not happy about that particular bit of information. "You're a vegetarian?"

"Yes, sir." she said again, unsure if anything else would help the situation or not.

"No wonder you're so skinny," he muttered.

"Dad!" Sean exclaimed at the same time his mother said, "Stop it."

"Emma worked really hard on this dinner," Sean said angrily. "The least you can do is be civil."

"Civil?" his father asked in disbelief. "To the girl my son is ruining his life for?"

Sean stood abruptly, his chair falling backwards as he looked down at his father. "I'm not ruining my life!"

"You were doing good back home. Then you see her," he glanced over at Emma quickly, "and all of a sudden you want to come back here."

"I love her," Sean gritted out slowly.

"Sex isn't love, boy."

"That's enough!" Sean's mother stood up, anger written all over her face. She reach over and grabbed Emma's hand. "You two work this out, Emma and I are going for a walk."

She lead Emma outside and onto the sidewalk. "You okay?"

"Yeah," Emma said, fighting back tears. "I just wanted tonight to go well. For Sean."

"I know, sweetie," she wrapped her arm around Emma's shoulder as they turned the corner. "That's part of the reason I know how much you love my son."

"I do."

"Good. Cause I couldn't have let him go again for someone who didn't," she smiled warmly and Emma returned it.

Emma face turned serious. "Do you think it was a good idea to leave them alone?"

"I don't know," she shook her head. "But it was the only thing I could think of."

...0...0...0...0...0...0...

They returned to find both men sitting silently at the table, their food cold on their plates. They sat and ate quietly, the only noise coming from the scrape of the forks against the plates. Sean's mom and Emma did the dishes and Emma decided to go home after that. Sean walked her to the door while his parents went to unpack.

"I'm sorry, Em," he told her, shutting the door behind him.

"It's not your fault."

"I feel like it is." Sean looked down at the ground. "I knew he'd do something like this."

"He's no worse than my mom," she said.

"She doesn't insult me to my face. Or accuse me of ruining your life," Sean said.

"No, she accuses me of ruining my own by focusing too much on you," Emma clarified. Then she smiled at him. "But who cares what they think."

"Right," he smirked, pulling her into a tight hug. "I'll see you tomorrow."

With a quick kiss, she headed home.

...0...0...0...0...0...0...

"Sean, I'm glad you're still up."

He looked up at his mom over the glass of milk he was drinking. After the way she had screamed at his dad, there was no way he could have gone to sleep.

"I want to give you something," she said, picking her purse up from the kitchen table. She rummaged around for a minute before handing him a small box.

"What is it?" he asked suspiciously.

"Open it."

He did. And he was floored by what he saw.

"It was my grandmother's. It's the only thing I have that's really valuable and means something to me. That's why I want you to have it," she said warmly.

"Mom, I ..."

"Don't. I don't feel like your father. I can see how much you love Emma. And that girl, she adores you. What more can I ask for my baby?" She kissed his forehead and went back to Sean's room.

He stared after her in disbelief. Then he looked down at the box in his hand, slightly amazed by what was inside. Yeah, they'd discussed it, but seeing that in his hand made it all too real. Were they ready for such a huge step?

He thought of Emma's face when she'd left that night. She was hurt and sad, but it was for him. She could handle his father not liking her, but it hurt her for his sake. She'd always wanted to make things better for him. That was part of the reason he loved her so much. He looked down again. It was almost like he could see her in the smooth surface, the little girl he met when he was thirteen and the girl he'd kissed goodbye just a few short hours ago. A sudden burst of clarity struck him and he just knew that it was meant for her.

Someday, maybe someday very soon, he was going to give Emma the engagement ring he held in his hands.


	22. Chapter 22

_**A/N: Mini update. The rest coming later.**_

...0...0...0...0...0...0...

The weeks wore on and, before anyone knew it, the days began to end sooner, and there was a slight chill in the air that caused everyone to wear jackets and scarves.

It had been almost six months since Sean had come to town for the race, and so far there hadn't been any more major problems. School was fine, he and Jay were getting back on track despite Jay's persistent refusal to tell him what he knew, and even things on the family front were alright.

So it was almost laughable when two days before Christmas Sean told Emma that his neighbor had left food out and now the whole building was crawling with ants. This prompted Emma to ask Spike if Sean could stay with them until the fumigation was over. At first she resisted, but the impending holiday persuaded her.

Sean showed up with one small suitcase and one large frown.

"Why the frown?" Emma asked him.

"No reason. I just have a bad feeling is all," he answered cryptically.

Emma frowned. "What kind of bad feeling?"

Sean shrugged then proceeded to flop onto the couch. "You're sure your parents are okay with me staying here?"

She sat down, her arms going naturally around his shoulders. "For the millionth time, yes."

He placed a hand on her knee absentmindedly. With a deep sigh he said, "At least it'll only be for a few days."

"It won't be that bad, will it?" she asked defensively.

Sean turned to face her completely, knowing she had gotten the wrong idea.

"Em, I didn't mean it that way. It's just going to be hard to be around you and not be able to ..." he trailed off, unsure of how to finish.

"To what?"

"With the way your parents feel, I won't even be able to kiss you while I'm here. I doubt they'll even like me holding your hand."

"It's just for a few days," she said soothingly.

Just then, Spike and Snake walked in with Jack and several large bags. Sean jumped up to help with the groceries and Spike raised her eyebrows in amusement. "Sean, relax," she said.

"Just want to help." he said hurriedly.

"You can help," Snake said, "by occupying Jack." With that, he placed Jack in Sean's arms, and he instantly began pulling on Sean's collar. Although Sean was still a bit uneasy around him, Jack had become very fond of Sean over the past few months.

Sean sat back down in his vacated seat on the couch next to Emma, and she instantly began playing peek-a-boo with Jack. He was still young enough to like the game, and he buried his head against Sean's chest in giggles. Spike and Snake looked at the scene in fondly.

"You guys get everything for the party?" Emma called to her parents while Sean and Jack began playing with Jack's toy cars on the floor. She stretched out and watched him and her brother. She didn't think she'd ever seen anything so cute.

"Yeah." Snake said. "We had to get the best to top Joey's party last year. Sean, you want to help with the lights?"

Sean shrugged, but got up to get his jacket and followed Snake outside. Emma walked into the kitchen where her mom was beginning to bake the cakes and cookies for the party.

"Wanna help?" Spike asked.

Emma nodded and began rolling out the dough for the sugar cookies.

"So," Spike began, "that looked like a pretty intense conversation we walked in on."

"Not really," Emma said, placing the first batch of cookies on the cookie sheet. "Sean's just a little ... nervous I guess."

"About what?"

"About you guys and how you feel about us," Emma said bluntly. "He thinks you don't like him."

Spike sighed deeply, setting the bowl containing her cake mix down on the counter. "It's not that I don't like Sean, honey. I do. And I'm always going to be grateful to him for saving your life ... "

"But?" Emma prodded.

"I just think you're both too young to be getting so serious."

"Mom ..."

"I know how you feel about Sean." Spike covered Emma's flour splattered hand with her own. "And anyone can see he's crazy about you. But I've seen it before. And both times ended with you heartbroken and crying for weeks. I just don't want to see you go through that again, sweetheart."

"I won't. Sean and I have grown up, Mom. We can actually talk to each other now. Without fighting," Emma insisted. "I get what you're saying. I just want you to be nicer to him. For me."

"I'll try." Spike said.

"Thank you."

...0...0...0...0...0...0...


	23. Chapter 23

_"Glad I found you Emma. You made my list."_

Sean tossed in his sleep, whimpering at the images running through his subconscious.

_Blood. So much blood. Everywhere. Eyes, blue and vacant, gazing unseeing up at the ceiling._

_Water. Closing in around him, pulling him under. Surrounding him._

_Tears swelling up in two very different pairs of brown eyes._

_"Freeze! Hands up."_

_Lights swirling red and blue and sirens tearing through the silent night._

_"I ... I had a ... thing ... with Jay, and we ... oh God, I can't say it."_

Sean turned over, trying to run ... escape ... get away from all the images beating against his brain.

Emma walked up the stairs, having been roused from a fitful sleep by the feeling that something wasn't right.

_Fists and legs coming at him, harder, faster every time._

_Tears and pain and sympathy in the eyes he'd sought refuge in since he was thirteen years old._

Emma heard Sean making noise in his sleep. And they weren't the kind of noises he usually made. It hadn't been long, but already she could tell how he was sleeping by whether he snored or sighed or mumbled. This was different. This was wrong.

"Sean." She crouched next to te couch, placing her hand gently on his shoulder. He whimpered again and her heart broke a little.

She said his name again, firmer and shook his arm slightly. He jerked and his eyes flew open. He bolted upwards, gasping for breath and sweating.

She was beside him on the couch in less than a second, her arms going tightly around him almost of their own free will. "Sean, what's wrong?" She wiped the hair from his forehead that was stuck to his clammy skin. He leaned into her touch.

"Just, just a nightmare," he said.

"What about?"

"I don't remember," he answered quickly. Too quickly.

"Sean, please don't lie to me." Emma whispered against his ear.

He couldn't look at her. Couldn't bear to see her face right then. He was still too ... raw.

"Em, I ... " He starts, breaking off when his voice cracks. "There's stuff you don't know."

"What kind of stuff?" She asked, her fingers slipping through the curly strands at the back of his neck.

"Stuff I don't ever want you to know."

Emma felt her heart cracking again, just a little bit more than it already was at seeing the pain he was in. Because he was shutting her out again.

"I thought we had an understanding Sean," Emma said bitterly, an angry edge clipping the end of her words. "No more bad stuff between us. I've told you the worst things that have happened to me. Things I'm more ashamed of than you can ever know ..."

"Yeah, I know what that's like," he said, eyes fixed on the carpet in front of him.

Sean had his hands clasped together on his knees, and at his words Emma placed her own over them. "Then tell me."

"I got arrested," he blurted out.

"What?" she asked, doubting she'd heard him right.

"Three months after I went back to Wasaga. Things were going so good, you know?" He stood up and began pacing around the living room. "My parents and I were getting along pretty good, school was fine. I had some decent people to hang with. I thought."

He looked over at her, hating the sympathy he saw in her eyes but craving the acceptance that was also there. He just wished it would be there when he was finished.

"I wrote you a letter," he told her, taking in the widening of her eyes and hating himself for hurting her once again. "And one to Ellie, and Jay. Hell, I even started one to Rick's parents."

Emma was shocked that he would do something like that. He had felt so guilty about what had happened to Rick ... but it showed that he had been right in going home to heal.

"But after ... I couldn't send them. I couldn't bear the thought of you knowing about it."

Sean walked close enough to the couch for her to grab his hand, forcing him to look at her.

"Sean, what happened?"

Her voice, so soft and tender, finally broke him.

The tear spilled over, cascading down his cheeks.

"I went to a convenience store with this guy, Neal, that I used to hang with. I was still so messed up ... he pulled a gun. Shot the clerk, dead. Took the money and left me and the gun behind. I was on my way out when the police showed up."

"Oh, Sean ..."

"My prints weren't on it. But the security tape wasn't working, so they booked me. God," he sank back down onto the couch beside her, "that was the worst moment of my life. Sitting there in that squad car. All I could think was what would happen if you could see me. If Ellie could, even Jay."

Emma linked her arms through his elbow, snuggling against his neck.

"They held me until I agreed to testify against Nick. I didn't want to, he was my friend. Then they played me this tape ... they caught him and he was trying to pin the whole thing on me." He lowered his head, laughing bitterly at the irony. "I don't ever want to go through that again," he said, looking into her eyes with a defiant expression she recognized from so long ago.

"I want more, Em. Jail ... guys like that, they lead to trouble. And I've had enough of it to last me a lifetime. That's when I got into racing. It was something I could be proud of."

Emma ran her fingers up and down his arm. "I'm glad you told me."

"I just, the thought of you, knowing I had been handcuffed ... fingerprinted ... I never wanted that."

She heard the self-loating and shame in his voice, and recognized the path he was about to go down. The one so full of regret and hurt the only way he could forget was to do something bigger just to make it all seem like not such a big deal.

"I'm glad you told me. I want to know you Sean. All of you," she whispered against his neck.

"You do. Nobody has ever known me the way you do. I've never ... I've never wanted anyone to."

She knew the strength it must have taken for him to confess something like that and wanted him to know she got it. But she couldn't think of a way to express it. She loved Sean with her whole heart and just prayed that he knew that.

But there was still something else. Still something between them she had to get rid of.

"Sean?"

"Yeah?" He was sitting back on the couch now, arm around her, holding her against his chest. Both of them pretended they didn't realize they were breaking the one rule Spike had given them for the duration of Sean's stay; they weren't allowed to be alone together in any room. Especially if everyone else was asleep.

"I have to ask you something."

He felt his stomach clench at the seriousness in her voice, but he needed to know. "What?"

"When Rick ... when you saved me ... " she struggled for the right words. "Afterwards, when I hugged you in Snake's classroom, you pushed me away. Why?"

Sean gulped. This was one thing he had hoped he'd never have to talk about again. "I was ashamed," he whispered.

Emma's brow wrinkled in confusion. "Of what?"

"You came in, and you were crying and then when you hugged me ... it just felt like ... you wanted me to make it all better," he said.

His words sank in and she realized he was right. "I did."

"I felt so guilty about what I did, what I **thought** I did to Rick," he explained, "just to save you, that I freaked when I realized you were grateful."

"I **was** grateful," She declared passionately. "You saved my life, Sean."

"He died Emma. And even though he didn't deserve it, I would do it all again to save you. That scared the hell out of me."

Not knowing what else to do, Emma turned her body so she was facing him completely, and wrapped her arms around his neck, clinging to him almost identical to the way she had that day two years earlier. Sean's own arms came up to wrap themselves around her back, rubbing soothingly across her skin.

"I lied to you, Emma," He whispered, refusing to let her go. He wouldn't be able to take it if he had to look into her eyes right then.

"When? You wouldn't do it again ..."

"No," He cut her off abruptly. "I would. Without a thought. I lied to you that day at the track. About the reason I didn't tell you I was coming to town."

She nodded, encouraging him to continue without wanting to pressure him.

"When Jay told me you had been sick ... all I wanted to do was run to be with you. But I was sick at myself for not having contacted you at all. I didn't think I had the right. And I thought if I saw you again, you would feel the same way."

Without words, Emma pulled back and kissed him hard, pouring everything she had into it. Hoping it would seep into him and let him know what she was feeling. Because there was no way she could say it.

However misguided, Sean had loved her at a time she thought he considered her a reminder of the most tragic part of his past. And even though they were screwed up, with their fights and misunderstandings and their twisted past, they were still Sean and Emma and things could only get better from there.

...0...0...0...0...0...0...


	24. Chapter 24

...0...0...0...0...0...0...

Emma waited until Sean had fallen back asleep before she went back down to her room. As much as she wanted to stay with Sean, the idea of her mom catching them would be very, very bad.

Like they would engage in, as Snake put it, 'hanky panky' on the couch with them just feet away. They did have some control.

Dawn was just breaking over the clouds, highlighting the fresh snow that had fallen during the night. The gauzy curtains her mother loved filtered the light just enough to cast a dim glow on Sean's face while he slept. Emma stopped at the entryway to the kitchen and stared back at him. A soft smile formed its way onto her lips, despite the lingering sadness she was still feeling. Sean looked so peaceful and almost innocent when he was sleeping. Emma could still see the vestiges of the boy she had first met all those years ago, and the angry young man who had so callously broken her heart.

But Sean was neither of those people anymore. He still had traces of both left in him, just as she still carried around the girl hoisting protest signs, but he had managed to fuse them together into the person she was so desperately trying to hold on to now.

Sean murmured in his sleep. Her instincts automatically kicked in and she tiptoed closer to see if he was okay.

His brow was furrowed just enough to make creases across his skin. His lips were pursed a bit, but not to the point where he looked upset. Most importantly, his eyes were not moving, which meant he wasn't dreaming. She sighed in relief. No nightmares.

It must have just been the lingering emotional affects that was causing it. He'd confessed he'd been having the nightmares ever since the shooting, before he even went back to Wasaga. Then told her they had gotten less graphic, and far more infrequent, since coming back to Toronto.

Sean settled down and resumed sleeping soundly, if still not peacefully. As quiet as she could, Emma crept back downstairs into her bed. But sleep never came. She just laid there thinking about what had happened earlier.

Every time she thought she and Sean had resolved all of their issues, new ones would crop up and throw them into a tailspin.

Honesty was something Emma valued very highly, even in the moments she had been less than honest herself. And of all the problems she and Sean had dealt with through the years, honesty had even shown up on the radar. Never once had she questioned his sincerity, even about Snake's laptop. He had lied to her about taking it yes, but she had believed him until she found out otherwise. But now ...

She understood Sean's desire to keep his arrest secret. She was even a little bit touched that he hadn't wanted to diminish her opinion of him. But the fact of the matter was that he had deliberately kept something from her after they had both sworn no more secrets.

She just wondered if there was anything else he was keeping from her.

...0...0...0...0...0...0...

The party was a huge success, and even Joey had reluctantly agreed he'd been outdone. The Simpson-Nelson house was swarming with people, half of whom Sean didn't even recognize, but he was only focused on one.

Emma had been moody and distant all day, but only with him. Around Manny and her family she seemed exactly the same. Each time he tried to touch her hand, or even just stand near her, she bolted like his skin scorched her.

He found her about three hours into the party, after escaping the tenth relative Snake had introduced him to. She was sitting halfway down the basement stairs, idly plucking at the bracelet around her wrist.

"Hey," he said softly.

"Hey," she replied.

He sat down on the step above her, not wanting to make things more awkward by getting too close and forcing her to bolt. "So ... " he began, unsure of how to start. Finally, he decided to just ease into it. "Just so you know, JT is upstairs hitting on your aunt."

"I told Diane not to let him have any eggnog," Emma said dully. It was a robotic answer, technical and devoid of emotion.

"Maybe he needs someone to watch him," Sean said slowly and the meaning behind it was not lost on her.

"Sean, I just need to think, okay?"

Sean took a deep breath, steeling his courage for what he said next. "About anything in particular?"

"Last night really scared me, Sean. What else are you keeping from me?"

Emma turned to look up at him, anger making her eyes glitter an angry brown. A deep flush rose high in her cheeks as Sean's features began to harden.

"I'm not keeping anything from you," he gritted out slowly.

"And the arrest? That just slipped your mind I guess," she said, sarcasm dripping from her words that would have made even Ellie proud.

"I thought you got it," he stated simply. "I thought you knew why I waited to tell you."

Emma scoffed bitterly. "Waited? Admit it Sean, you were never going to tell me. The only reason you did is because you were having a nightmare. You never would have told me otherwise and you know it."

Sean stood slowly, the anger radiating off him in waves. "If you think I could lie to you so easily, then why are you even with me?"

"Because I love you," she replied quickly. It was an automatic response and required no thinking. The sky is blue, fish swim, Emma loves Sean. Simple as that.

"Yeah, you sound really sincere."

Sean headed back up the stairs and Emma made no move to stop him even as she heard Spike repeatedly call his name and the thunderous slam of the front door.

"Em?" Manny appeared at the top of the stairs, concern filling her big eyes. "Sean just stormed out of here like some paratrooper on a secret mission. What happened?"

Tears flowing over, Emma whispered, "I don't know."

...0...0...0...0...0...0...


	25. Chapter 25

…0...0...0...0...0...0...

"I thought I'd find you here."

Emma looked up at Sean from her seat on the sidewalk. She had been there almost two hours. After Sean had stormed out of the party, she had left also to get way from the barrage of questions Manny and her mother had begun to hurl at her.

Sean sat down beside her and looked straight ahead through the same window she had been gazing in for over an hour and a half she had been sitting there.

"How did you find me?" she asked softly.

"Had a hunch." he answered. "Ever since you thought you were pregnant, I don't know, you've been different. Every time we pass by here you stop and look in. And when I got back to your house and Simpson said you took off, I just thought it was a good place to start."

Emma glanced back to the store. It was a little boutique that specialized in clothing and furniture for kids. The front window was decorated with the theme of 'Baby's First Christmas.' She had felt a pull toward it ever since she realized that she wasn't pregnant.

"It just makes me feel better I guess." she told him, looking in the darkened window. The store was closed, but the display was still partially illuminated, showing the white crib furnished with holiday themed linens.

"Em, I know you were upset when you found out you weren't pregnant, but you said yourself you weren't ready."

Tears started to well up in Emma's eyes. "I know. And I'm not, but Sean, for a while there I thought that there was this life inside of me. A real little person." She looked up at him and his heart broke at the heartache he saw in her face.

Sean took her hand slowly so she would have time to stop him if she wanted to. Given the rather volatile nature of their last conversation, he didn't want to chance upsetting her.

She let him take hold of her hand and he entwined his fingers around hers.

"What's this really about?"

She sighed deeply, trying to let the sadness out. "Sean, if I ask you something do you promise to tell me the truth?"

"Like you even have to ask." he said.

"Sorry, but I just don't want you to get angry."

Sean nodded. He had given up trying to figure out Emma's logic, but if she wanted him to promise, he would. "Okay, I promise."

Emma began rubbing her left hand over Sean's that was still holding her right. "Sean, you know I love you, don't you?"

"Yeah."

She ignored his abrupt answer. Sean wasn't big into talking about his feelings, so she accepted it.

"And I know you love me," she said, "but we're still so young. Do you ever worry that there's a chance we won't make it?"

"Honestly? No, I don't." he told her.

"Never?" she stared at him with just a touch of disbelief in her eyes.

"Nope. I love you Emma. I've lived my life without you, and it's not as good as it is when you're in it. I don't plan on letting you go if I can help it."

She snuggled closer to him and laid her head on his shoulder, letting some of his warmth seep into her to help fight the chilly December air.

"Do you ever think that?" he asked quietly after a few moments.

"Not really. I mean, I know the odds are against us, with our age and everything … but I can't imagine a future without you."

Sean removed his hand from hers and wrapped his arms around her, bringing her body closer against his. Her forehead was now pressed against his neck and she breathed in the familiar Sean scent that she loved so much.

"Okay then. That's a good thing." he whispered. "So what's wrong?"

"Every now and then," she confessed, "I imagine what if something happens to tear us apart. And when I thought I was pregnant, it just made it not seem as terrible."

"Did you think the baby would keep us together if something happened?"

"No, I just thought it would be easier if I had a little piece of you with me. In case the of the worst." she said.

"Oh."

"I know it's stupid," she started, but he cut her off.

"No, it's not stupid," he said. "It just shows me again how much you want us to stay together. And that's amazing to me." He kissed her forehead tenderly and she snuggled further into his embrace.

"So what was that little freak out about?" Sean asked, thinking back o the party.

"I hate the fact that you kept something as big as getting arrested from me." she replied. "I get why you did it, but it still hurts."

"I'm sorry. I just didn't want you to think any less of me."

Emma pulled away and looked him in the eyes, raising her hands to cup his cheeks. "Nothing could ever do that."

"Then why were you so angry?" he asked doubtfully. "And you avoided me all day. Are you having second thoughts?" Sean looked down at the ground, not wanting to see her face if it turned out he was right.

Emma jerked backwards, staring at him in disbelief before standing up in front of him. "How could you ever think that?"

Sean stood to face her. His face had taken on an hard expression that she recognized immediately. And just as she thought, Sean's words were angry, bitter.

"I think that because of the way you're reacting."

"Did I say anything to you last night that would make you think I was having second thoughts?" she demanded.

"You were upset." he said.

"Because you kept something really huge from me." she defended.

"And now you're acting like I was trying to hurt you on purpose." Sean accused.

She realized he was right, and threw her arms around him. "I'm sorry."

Sean wrapped his arms around her waist, rubbing her back and burying his nose in her hair. "I love you." he whispered, pulling back to kiss her nose to make her giggle.

"Me too." She stepped back and held a hand out to him. "Now that that's settled, it's preset time."

…0...0...0...0...0...0...

Spike began to rush over to Emma when she and Sean walked in the door, but Emma shook her head, trying to convey that everything was okay. Spike took one look at Sean's arm around Emma's shoulder and both of their hands tightly clasped, she knew they had managed to work through whatever they had been fighting over.

"Okay, me first." Emma said, going over to the tree and pulling Sean's present out. Taking his hand, she pulled him over to the staircase and sat down.

Sean eyed the box warily. Emma laughed at his expression. "Just open it.'

He peeled the paper off and lifted the lid off the box inside. She had knitted him a sweater, dark blue to ring out the almost gray like color of his eyes. She knew he was more a tee shirt kind of guy, but she wanted him to have something she had made especially for him.

"I love it." he told her, kissing her on the forehead.

"Hang on," she began rustling around in the tissue paper it had been wrapped in. She extracted another box, much smaller and held it out to him.

"Em, one is enough."

"Humor me here." she said.

He shook his head and opened it. "Tickets to the car show next month?"

She laughed at his shocked expression. "I knew you'd like it. And I'll go with you if you want to take me, but if not it's okay."

"How selfless of you." he said, an peeped around the wall to see if Spike was watching them. Once he saw that she wasn't, he kissed her sweetly. "Thank you."

She smiled at him warmly.

"And I would like you to go with me." he said, suppressing a laugh when her mouth dropped open slightly.

She clamped it shut quickly. "Fine. But I want major points for this."

"Deal. Now," he reached into the pocket of his jeans, "open yours."

Feeling like a little girl, Emma tore the silver paper away. There was a velvet jewelry box inside. Surprised, she glanced up at Sean to see him watching her impatiently. She opened the lid. Inside was a silver locket, heart shaped, and engraved with tiny roses.

"Sean, it's beautiful." she breathed. Throwing her arms around his neck, she placed sloppy kisses all over his face. "I love it."

He laughed as she hugged her back. "Manny deserves some of the credit. She helped me pick it out."

"I'll thank her later." she said, and opened the locket. She laughed.

"What?" he asked.

She held it up for him to see. On either side were tiny pictures of him, one from when they first started dating back in grade seven and what looked to be a very recent one.

"I didn't put those in there." he said, his face contorted in confusion.

Manny sauntered by the stairs, and hearing the conversation, spoke up. "I did. Figured I saved Em the trouble."

Emma laughed and Sean blushed.

"That's what you get for having me wrap it." Manny said as she walked away.

Still blushing, Sean put the necklace on her.

"You know, if you want to change those, I won't mind."

She shook her head emphatically. "Nope. They're staying."

"Okay."

He still sounded a bit embarrassed, and she wrapped her arms around him, nuzzling against his cheek. "Did I ever tell you that you're awfully cute when you get all flustered."

"Em …" The blush that had begun to subside flared up again and she giggled.

"About earlier," she said reluctantly, "do you forgive me?"

"There's nothing to forgive." he said and kissed her forehead.

"Well don't you two look cozy." Spike observed as she rounded the corner on her way to take Jack upstairs.

Sean tried to pull away, but Emma retained her hold on him.

"The party's about to break up," Spike told them. She made a distinct point of not mentioning the cuddling, per Emma's request. Spike genuinely liked Sean, and loved her daughter enough to stop interfering. Seeing them being able to work through the fight they'd had earlier showed that just may make it this time.

She adjusted Jack in her arms. "Will you two help Snake clean up and get everybody's coats?"

"Sure Mom." Emma said. She let go of Sean only to take hold of his hand and pull him toward the living room with her.

"What was that about?" Sean hissed.

"My mom's not going to pretend that we're not serious about each other anymore. She promised to respect what we have."

"Serious?"

She nodded, and kissed him just to show that no one was going to object.

…0...0...0...0...0...0...

After everything was cleaned up, Emma sat down to watch a marathon of classic Christmas movies on television and insisted everybody join her. Manny escaped with the excuse that she was going to go see her parents. Sean and her parents weren't as fortunate.

"Okay, it's time for the aged to head up to bed." Snake announced when the second movie began. He and Spike went upstairs, making sure to tell Emma not to be upstairs too long.

Sean handed Emma a tissue. On screen George Bailey was contemplating jumping off a bridge and it always made her cry. He didn't understand why she would watch a movie that made her sad.

Emma sniffled and snuggled closer to Sean, her hand going to his knee.

He cleared his throat, adjusting in his seat and causing her hand to fall away.

"Sean?"

"Em, your parents are right upstairs." he said.

"They're in bed Sean."

"But they aren't asleep. And your mom made it very clear that she didn't want us to be alone together. It was rule number one, remember?"

"Sean," she took his hands in hers. "If they didn't trust us, they wouldn't have left us alone down here together. They know we're not going to have sex on the couch the second they leave the room."

"Emma." he hissed, looking over his shoulder at her mention of sex to make sure they hadn't been overheard.

"You're being paranoid." she groused, settling back against the couch to watch Mary attempt to get George to notice her.

"I just don't want to give them any reason not to trust us." he explained.

"Us?" she asked, her eyebrow raised, not looking away from the TV.

"Okay, me. I don't want them to think that I'm only after one thing, or that I'm trying to corrupt you or something like that.'

"Corrupt me?" she laughed.

His cheeks reddened. "I'm not exactly a parents' idea of the perfect boyfriend."

"But you're mine." she said sincerely.

He smiled at her, letting the mushiness of her words get the best of him.

"Come here." He held his arms out to her, and she snuggled against his chest. Dropping a kiss on top of her head, they settled in to watch the rest of the movie.

…0...0...0...0...0...0...

_**A/N: Next chapter should be up tomorrow or the nest day.**_


	26. Chapter 26

…0...0...0...0...0...0...

Spike and Snake walked into the living room the next morning to find Sean and Emma asleep on the couch, so entangled it was hard to tell where one ended and the other began.

As quiet as possible, Spike got her camera from the shelf and snapped a picture of the two of them.

The flash woke Sean, and when he opened his eyes to see Emma's parents staring at him, he realized that Emma was still asleep next him and panicked.

"Em," he hissed, attempting to detangle himself from her.

Emma felt him trying to pull away, and in her half-awake state, she tightened her hold on him to prevent his moving. "Uh-uh." she mumbled and buried her head into his chest.

Sean's entire face was beat red from the embarrassment of Emma's parents catching them in such a tender moment. He attempted again to get loose, shaking her shoulder to rouse her from her sleep.

"What?" she demanded grumpily, her lips forming a pout. It was then that she saw her parents in front of them, both trying desperately to suppress their laughter.

"Oh my … I am so sorry … we fell asleep and …" Emma began to explain, her words becoming jumbled as she too tried to extricate herself from the lock she and Sean were in.

"Em, it's okay. Breath." Spike told her, chuckling a little at her awkwardness.

"Merry Christmas." Snake added, his laughter finally getting the better of him.

By then, both Sean and Emma were crimson and Spike and Snake were out of breath in laughter. Jack calling for his mother from upstairs was the only thing that broke the moment. She headed up to get him, leaving Snake to head off to make breakfast.

Sean groaned in embarrassment, his face still red.

Emma wrapped her arms around him, burying her face in his neck. "It wasn't that bad."

"Easy for you to say." he muttered.

She laughed at his expression. Just then his phone rang from inside his jacket pocket. He answered quickly to get out of the current situation.

"Who was it?" she asked once he'd hung up.

"My super. He said the ants are gone, and I can be back in my apartment by tomorrow night."

Emma pouted. "Aw, I was getting used to you being here."

He kissed her softly. "You can still stay over whenever you want."

"I plan to take you up on that." she said teasingly, leaning in closer, just enough to barely brush her lips against his but not enough to actually kiss him.

"You're a bit of a tease, you know that?" he asked huskily.

"You know you love it." she whispered.

"That I do." he said, grasping her shoulders to pull her close enough to finally capture her lips with his own.

"Ahem."

The pair sprang apart, both once again a deep crimson. Snake raised a skeptical eyebrow at them, a grin flitting over his mouth.

"Breakfast." he said.

They were unsure if he had heard what they had said, but wouldn't risk asking him. Instead, they stood up and headed into the kitchen.

…0...0...0...0...0...0...

The day before Sean was to spend at the Simpson-Nelson residence was spent helping Snake take down the Christmas lights and repeatedly being roped into playing trucks with Jack. There seemed to be a family conspiracy to keep him away from Emma as much as possible.

The morning Sean was supposed to go back to his place, he ran into Emma in front of the upstairs bathroom.

"Somebody call the cops, we're actually alone." Sean joked, putting his arms around her waist to pull her closer.

In return, Emma placed her hands on his shoulders. "I believe you're right."

He kissed her, letting his hands slide up to tangle in her hair. She moaned in response and tightened her grip on his shoulders.

They pulled apart when breathing became an issue. Sean leaned his forehead against hers.

"I can not wait until you get your place back. We are in serious need of some privacy." she said, and kissed him again, harder this time, forcing him to lean back up against the wall.

Sean laughed against her mouth. "Does that mean I can count on a house guest tonight?"

"I think it's only fair that I return the favor." she said. Feeling a little daring, she let her hands slide underneath his shirt and over his stomach.

Sean groaned and pulled her flush against him. They stayed that way until they heard they heard the sound of footsteps coming up the stairs.

Seeing no other option, Emma ducked into the bathroom, pulling Sean in behind her.

"The bathroom? Em, I had no idea you were into this kind of stuff." he joked.

Turning pink, she shushed him. "If we get caught in here we're so dead."

"Hey," he held up his hands in defense, "you attacked me."

She stuck her tongue out at him and pressed her ear to the door to listen if whoever was in the hall was still there or not. A knock sounded against her ear and she jumped. Sean clapped a hand over his mouth to stifle his laughter.

"Em, honey, are you in there?" her mother's voice sounded.

"Um, yeah." she said once she recovered. "Manny's in our shower."

"Okay. Have you seen Sean? Snake wants him to help him take the rest of the decorations out back."

"Nope, not since this morning." she said. "But he said something last night about needing to go to the store."

"Alright." Spike's footsteps headed off down the hall.

Emma sighed in relief. She slumped against the door and saw Sean giving her an inquiring look.

"Don't look at me like that Sean. I hate lying to her, but if she knew we were in here together, you know she would assume the worst."

"That we're in here having a little 'hanky panky.'" he added finger quotes on the words and she laughed.

"Well, yeah."

"That **was** sort of your intention Miss Nelson." he said, walking over slowly and wrapping his arm around her waist.

"Uh-uh." she scolded playfully. She turned her face when he tried to kiss her, and he exhaled heavily against her cheek. "You need to go find Manny and talk her into covering for me tonight."

"Cover?"

"I can't go up to my mom and say "I'm staying over at Sean's tonight.' Her head would probably explode."

Sean sighed. "Going."

…0...0...0...0...0...0...

Manny had arranged a sleepover with Darcy at Chante's in record time, with the story that Sean was driving them over.

But no sooner than they pulled up in front of Sean's apartment, then Emma's phone rang. It was Manny finalizing the details.

"I'll just be a sec." Emma said, flipping her phone open.

Sean headed inside, leaving the door open. He flopped onto the couch, exhaling a deep breath at being back.

"Hey man, have you ever heard of grocery shopping?"

Sean jumped up at the sound of the voice to see none other than his brother walking from his bedroom in nothing but a pair of boxers.

"What are you doing here?" he demanded.

"Nice little bro. Just passing through town and thought I'd stop by to see how you've been." Tracker answered.

"How did you even know I was here?"

Tracker shrugged. "I was in Barrie a few weeks ago, stopped to see Uncle Bill. He said that Mom mentioned you were back in Toronto. I had a hunch you'd be back in this building."

"So the super just let you in?" Sean asked.

"What can I say, the guy always liked me," he began smirking, "and by the way, you really need to clean up every once and awhile."

"Like you're one to talk." Sean muttered.

Tracker laughed. "I am because you never found anything like this," he threw something at Sean, "when we lived together."

Sean looked at the object his brother had thrown at him. A pair of panties. He flushed a bright red and Tracker cracked up.

"Those were under your pillow," he laughed. "Imagine my surprise."

"Who the hell said you could sleep in my bed?" Sean demanded to hide his embarrassment.

"You weren't here." Tracker justified.

Just then Emma walked inside, having heard Sean talking to someone. When she noticed Tracker standing there in his underwear she averted her eyes.

"Emma." Tracker said in surprise. "Nice to see you again."

"You too." she replied, her hand over her eyes.

"If you guys need me, I'll be in the shower." Tracker told them. He walked off chuckling.

"What was with all the yelling?" she asked. Then her eyes fell on Sean's hand, and she noticed that he was clutching something pink.

"What is that?"

"Nothing." he answered quickly, stuffing them into his pocket.

"What? Let me see." she made a grab or his pocket and he sidestepped around her hand.

"Sean!"

She made a grab again, and once more he dodged her. That continued until Sean ducked so far back he lost his balance and tumbled onto the couch, pulling her with him when he grabbed her to try and steady himself.

They landed with Sean on his back and Emma on top of him, her legs on either side of his thighs. Sean was so thrown off, that Emma managed to grab his hand and extricate what he'd been hiding from her.

Her face froze in an expression of disbelief. "Sean?!"

"Well," Tracker had walked out of the shower to find them on the couch and burst out laughing, "I guess I can't leave you two alone for too long."

Emma made a disgusted sound in the back of her throat and pushed herself off Sean. "You don't have to worry," she told him, grabbing her bag off the floor, "I'm leaving."

"Emma." Sean jumped up and grabbed her hand. "Please stay. I'm sorry about the … you know. Tracker found them and …"

"What?!" she hissed. "Oh my God."

"Uh, I heard my name." Tracker walked over to them. "Look Emma, if you're upset about the … you know," he gestured to the underwear in her hand, "I'm sorry. I didn't know they were yours. I was just messing with Sean."

She was still slightly pink, but nodded, unable to look him in the eye. "Thanks."

"Listen," he said to Sean, "I gotta be in Halifax by tomorrow night, so I'm gonna get on the road."

Sean realized that his brother was just trying to make the situation easier for Emma, and he gave him a look that said he got it, and was grateful. He hugged him goodbye briefly.

"Emma." Tracker said in way of a farewell.

"Tracker."

The silence echoed painfully throughout the apartment after Tracker shut the door. Emma was still standing completely still, arms wrapped around herself, staring at the floor.

'_Typical Tracker.'_ Sean thought. _'Shows up just enough to ruin my night with Emma then takes off. Hope the ant dust makes him itch for a year.'_

"Em," he says quietly. Expressing his opinion of his brother at that point would have been pointless and he knew it. "Are you alright?"

"Oh I'm fantastic." she spat sarcastically. "I walk in here expecting a romantic night with you, but instead I find your brother, in his underwear, and you tell me he found my panties. Yeah Sean, I'm just peachy."

Her face was the epitome of rage, and Sean knew that she was likely to stay plenty mad for quite awhile. Because this wasn't just any little thing that had happened. Emma was especially private and silent when it came to sex. After her mom's feelings and the pregnancy scare, he could understand. And given that he was the only person she'd ever been with, he understood her hesitancy better. He even respected her all the more for it. Guys talked about sex, it was a universal truth. And he had done his fair share of bragging about Amy, and even about Ellie to a point. But only to Jay and nothing too intimate. But he was already set on spending the rest of his life with Emma. That made what happened between them physically off limits. So his brother's actions upsetting her so badly wasn't a surprise. If anything, he'd expected a bigger outburst.

He sighed. "I'm sorry about that. Tracker's an idiot."

"No, it's not entirely his fault." she said.

Sean raised his eyebrows. "It's not?"

"No. We were the ones that left them there." she held her hand up slightly.

"It's not like we knew he would turn up and sleep in my bed. And if the bug gas was so dangerous, why'd the super even let him in?" Sean wondered.

"Still, he clearly didn't think we'd still be together." she said, finally setting her bag down on the floor. She looked at Sean with her eyes huge and full of fear. "What does that say?"

"Nothing. Just that he's never dated the same girl for more than two weeks and that none of them were dumb enough to date him a second, let alone a third time. He doesn't know anything." he told her, pulling her to him in a tight hug.

"Or maybe," he added mischievously, "he didn't think you were the kind of girl to leave her panties under a guy's pillow."

She made an outraged noise and punched him in the arm. "It's not funny. I may never recover from the emotional scars of knowing your **brother** touched my **underwear**. Ew."

Sean made a face. "You're right. It is gross."

"Okay, new subject." she said. "We have exactly twelve hours of alone time." She wound her arms around his neck. "And if you apologize really nicely, I may let you use it to make that very embarrassing moment up to me."

"I think I can manage that." he told her, swinging her over his shoulder and carrying her over to the couch.

…0...0...0...0...0...0...


	27. Chapter 27

_**A/N: Anybody wonder what the title means? This chapter finally gives a clue. : )**_

…0...0...0...0...0...0...

"Jay's coming over tonight."

Emma looked up at Sean over the spaghetti her mom had sent over. They had a huge test in history the next day and she had managed to talk Spike into relinquishing curfew for one night so they could study. But she made sure to tell them that if they didn't both get A's she would never let them study at Sean's place again.

"Sean, we have to study." she protested.

"Em, we've been studying all weekend. We know this stuff cold." he assured her.

He got up and put the plates in the sink. He had been using paper plates and cups until Emma finally got fed up and made him buy some actual dishes and liquid detergent to wash them. He didn't say anything, but he still used the paper ones when she wasn't around.

"Sean," she began again.

He cut her off with a look. "Jay and I need to talk about something."

Emma crossed her arms over her chest. "Does this have anything to do with him knowing who beat you up?"

He nodded and she got up from the table abruptly, sitting on the couch in the midst of a full fledged pout. He shook his head. Dealing with Emma when she got like this was never fun. She had to be one of the most stubborn people he had ever met. And considering whom he was, that was really saying something.

He sat beside her and wrapped an arm around her shoulder. "Em," he said softly, "I know you're worried, but I need to know. If for no other reason than just to find out why they did it."

"I get that." she told him. "But Sean, look what's already happened. If you cross these guys it could get worse."

Sean pulled her against him, her head falling onto his shoulder, and kissed her temple. He hated making her fret like this, but once it was over it would be so much better for the both of them.

"I just want this over with. Once and for all."

She sighed. There was no way Sean was just going to let this go. "Okay. Just be careful. Please."

Sean's hand found its way under her chin and tilted her face up to look her in the eye. "I promise."

A knock sounded on the door, and Sean went to answer it. It was Jay, just as suspected. He nodded in Emma's direction by way of a greeting. After all that time, he was still wary to act too friendly toward her, not wanting Sean to think he was after her. Their friendship was still shaky, and it made Emma realize just how much it would actually mean to Jay to fix things with his best friend.

Sean gave her a look over Jay's shoulder. He wanted to talk to Jay in private, so she excused herself and went to clean up the kitchen.

She snuck glances at them while she was in the kitchen, feeling a bit like a fifties housewife, while they talked. Emma knew Sean wasn't trying to keep things from her, he just preferred to do stuff like this in private and then tell her what he thought was least likely to upset her. She didn't like it, but it was his way of trying to protect her so she dealt with it.

She heard Sean curse loudly, and he started pacing around the room. She made to come back into the living room, but Jay caught her eye, and in realizing her worry, directed Sean outside.

It was close to an hour before Sean came back inside. Emma had been sitting on the couch chewing her nails, a habit she had given up years earlier, lost in horrible thoughts that they had gone out looking for the guys. The sight of him coming through the door, sans blood and bruises, made her heart leap into her throat in relief.

"Sean, what's going on?"

He came over and sat beside her, taking her hands in his. "Em, it was Peter."

Her face scrunched in confusion. "What was Peter?" Then she remembered just what the whole thing with Jay had been about. "Sean, there's no way Peter could beat you up. He's, well, kinda wimpy."

Sean shook his head. "He is, but his checkbook isn't."

"He … he paid someone to beat you up?" she asked in disbelief. She knew Peter was angry that she had broken up with him for Sean, but this … it was despicable.

"Why would he do something like that?" she whispered.

"If I lost you, I might do something horrible too." he said, pulling her against him. Peter wasn't Emma's favorite person, but the idea that she had cared about someone that was capable of doing something so underhanded was no doubt going to tough on her, and he hated Peter even more for putting her through that.

"You don't have that kind of hate in you." Emma told him sincerely.

Sean cleared his throat in discomfort. He still didn't handle compliments or praise that well. It was one of the most endearing things about him in her mind. "Jay and I had an idea. About how to get even with him."

"What kind of idea?" she asked uncertainly. If Sean wouldn't look her in the eye, like he was doing right then, he knew it was because she wouldn't approve.

"Something we need your help with. But I don't think you're going to like it." he answered.

Butterflies fluttering in her stomach, she agreed. And Sean began to fill her in on the details.

"Well?" he asked once he was finished, "Will you do it?"

"Okay. But only on one condition."

"Name it." he told her sincerely.

"You watch the meteor shower with me tonight."

"Huh?" he asked, confusion spreading over his face.

"If we're going to do this, we need one more night of just plain fun." she explained.

Sean grimaced. Meteor showers weren't his idea of a good time, but for Emma he'd do almost anything. "Fine."

…0...0...0...0...0...0...

Emma fixed a blanket on the hood of Sean's car. He hadn't been too happy with the idea, but it had been raining sporadically all weekend and she wasn't about to sit in the wet grass.

"It looks like its raining fire." Sean said in awe. They had been watching for forty-five minutes before anything happened. Then all at once it look like the sky had exploded in sparks.

"I knew you'd like it," Emma said smugly.

Sean looked over at her, her face upturned toward the sky, aglow by the lights falling in the sky.

"God, its beautiful." she breathed.

"Yeah," he said, still focused on her, "it is."

She glanced over at him and laughed at the sappy expression on his face. "I meant the stars, Sean."

"Yeah, well, those too." he said.

Emma looked back up at the sky, still chuckling. Sean continued to watch her, gazing up into the big black night alit with streaks of red and yellow and suddenly his heart began to thud against his chest. His breathing became rapid and there was a rushing noise in his ears.

He felt a burning rising up from his toes, but he wasn't scared. He knew exactly what was going on. There he was, watching one of the greatest natural events of the century, and he couldn't keep his eyes off the girl lying in the grass next to him. It could only mean one thing.

Emma was the one.

He had known that for a while. But lying there under the shooting stars, it was as if the universe was sending him a message. Emma meant more to him than his own life, and there was no way he could ignore the fact that he wanted her to be his always.

Emma felt Sean's eyes still fixed on her, but there was a change. She glanced back over at him, expecting to see a brooding, intense gaze. Instead, he appeared as if he had just had some sort of epiphany.

"Sean," she sat up and put a hand on his arm, "are you alright?"

He didn't answer, merely sat up as well and placed his hands on her face.

"Okay, Sean, you're kind of scaring me here." she told him.

He kissed her, but she pulled back and asked again what was wrong. Sean simply brushed an errant strand of hair behind her ear, putting all thoughts of Jay and Peter and their crazy plan out of his hand. All that mattered was sitting there in front of him.

"Marry me."

…0...0...0...0...0...0...

_**A/N: Oh, do you hate me yet? What can I say, I enjoy being evil.**_


	28. Chapter 28

…0...0...0...0...0...0...

Emma sat in shocked silence, waiting for Sean to correct himself. There was no way he had actually just said that.

When she didn't say anything, Sean snapped out of the trance like state he was in. He took in Emma's stunned expression and knew instantly that he had just made a huge mistake. "I'm sorry, Em," he told her hastily, "I have no idea what came over me."

"You mean you didn't intend to propose?" she asked, half relieved, half disappointed.

"It's only … I just …" he stammered. Sean licked his lips anxiously. Yeah, he wanted to marry Emma someday. But he'd never meant to just blurt it out like that.

He took a deep breath. "I didn't mean to just…say it like that."

Emma smiled at him, her hand finding its way to his cheek. "It's okay."

"You're not mad?" he asked. He had been certain that Emma would be freaking out, not just because he had asked her, but that he hadn't even been planning to do it. Her reaction was more than a little surprising.

"Why would I be mad? You want to marry me." She leaned in closer and kissed him softly. "That's amazing."

Sean blushed. "Of course I do," he mumbled.

Emma giggled at his embarrassment. He may not think so, but to her it was adorable. She scooted closer to him, wrapping her arms around his neck, burying her face against his cheek. She was feeling really sappy in the way only Sean could make her feel; usually when he wasn't even trying.

Sean continued to blush a little, but wrapped an arm around her waist. "So, can we pretend that didn't happen?"

Emma shook her head emphatically. "No way. I love that you love me that much. I'm never gonna forget that you asked me."

Sean squirmed a bit. "But it was…"

"It was sweet," she interjected. "And it came from your heart. That's all that matters."

Sean was clearly uncomfortable still talking about this. He just wanted to pretend that it never happened. "Okay, then let's just change the subject. What about tomorrow? Are you really sure you want to do this?"

Emma sighed, disgruntled at the startling loss of tenderness in the moment. "Sean, I wouldn't have agreed if I didn't."

"You agreed to help me, not because you're dying to do this," he said.

Emma pulled away from him a bit and glanced up at the remaining pink streaks in the sky. "Honestly," she said, "it isn't something I'm particularly thrilled about, but you asked me and it's important to you, so I'm going to do it."

Sean tangled his hand in her hair, pushing it away from her face so he could see her expression, and causing her to look over at him. He gave her a small smile. "Do you have any idea how much I love you?"

She lost the battle to keep her face neutral and returned his smile. "I think so."

…0...0...0...0...0...0...

Sean peeped around the corner the next day at school. "Okay. Here comes Peter. Ready?"

"As I'll ever be," she said.

Emma took a deep breath and went around the corner, setting her face in an expression of anger. "I can't believe you, Sean."

Sean's face was a mirror of her own forced outrage as she yelled at him. "Me? I'm not the cheater," he retorted.

The entirety of the Degrassi hallway had stopped to watch the spectacle at Emma's first words, but Sean's comments sent the crowd into a fury of whispers.

Emma felt a real flush creep up her face just from being the center of attention. "For the last time, I did not cheat. He kissed me."

"And you stopped him? I saw you, Emma. You were just as into it as he was."

Emma was at her locker and slammed it open, turning her face away from her boyfriend. "I'm not doing this here, Sean."

"Why not?" he demanded, catching sight of Peter inching his way to the front of the crowd. "If you really do have nothing to hide, why not declare it in front of everybody?" Sean spread his arms out to indicate the crowd gathered around them.

She whirled, her entire face red with anger and embarrassment. "Because I'm not interested in the whole school knowing my business."

By this time, all the classes had been dismissed and the flow of students passing through that particular hallway on the way to their next classes got caught up in the crowd. Manny and JT were coming from English and noticed the large gathering, and Sean and Emma at the center of it. They forced their way through the throng to their friends.

"Em, what's going on?" Manny asked, coming up to and placing a hand on Emma's arm.

"Go ahead, Emma. Tell them," Sean prodded, crossing his arms over his chest.

JT reached Emma's other side and glared at Sean, thinking back to the time when he really couldn't stand him because of what he always did to Emma. Looking at him right then, he could have been the exact same guy who had broken her heart before with his callous actions.

"There's nothing to tell," Emma replied.

"Really? What about you making out with Jay?" Sean demanded.

Manny's mouth dropped open and she looked over at Emma. Her best friend was glaring daggers at Sean, her eyes full of tears and something else. Something that looked a lot like guilt.

"He kissed me," Emma whispered.

Sean walked closer to her, noting the way Manny and JT tensed at his approach. "And you stopped him, right?"

"Sean, I love you. Jay doesn't mean anything to me," she told him, her voice louder now but still quavering.

Sean snorted. "He meant enough for you to get into that van."

There was a collective intake of breath from the crowd. Emma and Jay weren't a secret, but nobody ever mentioned it to Emma's face.

Sean had come up with the idea for Emma to punch him, like she had with Peter, but Emma had refused from the start. Sean had never once reproached her for what had happened between her and Jay. But now that he had actually thrown it back in her face in their mock fight, she let herself get so carried away that she lost control and before she even realize it was happening, her hand flew up and struck him as hard as she could across his cheek.

Sean's eyes stung from the contact with Emma's hand. He glanced at her, her chest heaving with the ragged breathing from her mock rage. "Go to hell, Sean," she spat and stormed off down the hall.

She stopped outside the atrium, waiting for Peter. Emma knew him well enough to know he'd be there in three…two…one…

"Emma!" Peter yelled down the hallway.

"Not now, Peter," she pleaded, making her voice sound as pitiful as possible.

"What was all that about?" he asked, ignoring her plea.

Emma took a deep breath. This was it. "Sean and I were hanging out at his place last night when Jay came over. Sean went out to get a pizza, and Jay kissed me right as Sean was walking back inside. He accused me of cheating," She looked up at Peter, surprised to see him looking sympathetic instead of gloating. "Go ahead; I'm sure you're dying to rub it in. Turnabout's fair play, right?"

"I would never say that, Emma. Honest. I'm just sorry he hurt you again." Peter replied. His voice actually sounded honest for a change. It took everything she had not to call him out on it.

"You know," he began, "I'm here if you ever want to talk." He placed a hand on her arm and she resisted the urge to smack it away.

She smiled weakly. "Thanks. I better get to class."

Peter nodded and she walked off, fighting the urge to shudder as she headed toward the MI lab. She knew Manny and JT would have told Snake everything by now and that he would be waiting for her.

Out of nowhere a strong arm reached out and ensnared her by the waist, pulling her into the janitor's closet just outside the lab.

Sean removed his hand from Emma's mouth and grinned at her devilishly. He hadn't wanted her to scream, but hoped she wouldn't be angry about it.

"That wasn't very nice," She pushed her lips out in pout and gave him the big puppy eyes she knew he couldn't resist. It pretty much guaranteed her anything she wanted out of him.

Sean knew what she was trying to do, but gave in anyway. "Anything I can do to make it up to you?" he asked, skimming his hands up her bare arms.

Emma smirked, leaning in to kiss him. "Maybe," she said and twisted her fingers in his long curls. She noticed that Sean's cheek was red and appeared to have finger like marks on his skin. She kissed the place where her hand had landed gingerly. "I'm sorry."

Sean shook his head. "Don't be. It worked, and I had it coming from way back."

"No, you didn't," Emma protested. She didn't want to get into their complicated past right now. It wouldn't help anything.

Emma looked around the dark space skeptically. "I had no idea that it was so big in here."

Sean followed her gaze. "Yeah, no wonder I had to wait ten minutes to get in here," He smirked at the recollection of the looks on the faces of the grade nines when they saw him upon their exit.

"You locked the door, right?" Emma asked.

Sean nodded.

Emma slid her hands down Sean's back and up under his shirt. "Good. Because until this thing is over, we're stuck in here if we want to be alone."

Sean let his hands take place on Emma's hips, pulling her closer to him. "Hmm, sneaking around to make out with my girlfriend on school ground. Tough job, but somebody's gotta do it."

She shook her head, chuckling. "You're a bit of a perv. You know that, don't you?"

"That's why you love me," Sean quipped, kissing her deeply and cutting off her reply. Emma let her comment go, figuring it could wait for later.

…0...0...0...0...0...0...


End file.
